The Next Event
by kolyaaa
Summary: Long lost sibling story! with naked women, feats of strength, a big fight, McKay punched in the face, cute fluffy creatures, beautiful fantastic beasts, blood! guts! GORE! Quicksand! SINK HOLES! Team fic w Beckett and best OFC ever!
1. 1:The Distracted

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

Disclaimer: Okay, so the Stargate: Atlantis and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. No copyright infringement is intended. If I owned 'em, I'd probably sell 'em to buy Julie that better hay she's been wanting. Sadly, I don't, so I hope I won't be sued because, then, how would I buy Julie her hay at all? Or keep her barn warm? Or keep that deadbeat Yak lover of hers off the premises (damn Yak!)? Seriously! Do you really want to put her through that kind of pain? Think of the trauma! Think of the angst! Don't hurt JULIE! Touch my cow and you'll lose a few fingers. I don't kid about things like that...

Characters: Shepard, McKay, Ronon, Teyla and Beckett

Season: 2 - shortly after Trinity

Status/Parts: 20-ish

Description: You will adore this one. You will eat it up like soup and crackers and come back begging for more. It involves a long lost sibling, a revived Satedan festival, and a journey to a fantastic place. The story has everything you could want: naked women, feats of strength, one hell of a fight, and McKay gets popped in the face (he's been begging for that for a while). Then there's cute fluffy creatures, beautiful fantastic creatures, blood! guts! GORE! CAVE-INS! DESTRUCTION and things blow up. Yeah. This is such a good story, you're going to be leaving me feedback with every chapter. You won't be able to help yourself so get started now.

Author's Note: Okay, it's been a while since my last story. There's good reason for this. It involves watching too much curling during the Olympics, a horrible horse shaving incident, a problematic hatch door, too many Girl Scout Cookies and a lizard that got into the underground bunker. I have named him Sydney

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**CHAPTER ONE: THE DISTRACTED **

Bouncing on the balls of his feet, Sheppard ducked and shifted, successfully avoiding Ronon's fist. He smirked and waggled his head, taunting the giant warrior as he ducked another attempt.

This was getting too easy, John thought as he outmaneuvered the big man. There was a time when Ronon could lay him flat on his back inside a minute of sparring – but today, Sheppard almost had an advantage. Dex seemed a little – off, and John was doing his best to exploit the distracted man at every turn.

With a little grin, Sheppard realized that he might actually win this one. He turned, and struck, landing a blow on Ronon's side, sending the man back a step or two. Yeah, Sheppard thought, this was going good.

"You're slow today," the colonel teased, feeling brash as he bounced. He ducked again as Ronon came at him, sure of what Dex's next move would be, only to suddenly feel something smack into his ankles, and his feet left the floor as Ronon swept his leg out and around.

John landed flat on his back with a solid thud, the air leaving his lungs with an audible 'whoosh'. He lay gasping as the Satedan hovered above him. Ow, he thought, chiding himself for getting cocky. Served him right, he supposed. Slowly, Sheppard pushed up and flipped over; one arm wagged lazily at Ronon as he had yet to recover enough to speak.

"You were saying?" Ronon asked, leaning over and placing his hands on his knees as he took a moment to catch his breath as well.

"See," John accused with a gasp. "I'm gaining on you. I almost had you." He frowned as Ronon shrugged and reached out a hand to help him up. "Or…" Sheppard drew out the word and grasped Dex's hand, allowing the taller man to assist him up. "…You're distracted."

Sheppard watched closely as Ronon paused before moving toward the window-seat. The gym was deserted and silence fell heavily around them as John waited for Ronon to decide whether to respond or not.

Ronon plunked himself down on the seat as if, uncharacteristically, all his energy was gone. He leaned forward, resting his arms on his thighs and focused on the floor. For a moment he said nothing, working his jaw as if he was chewing on something. Finally, after letting out a breath, he spoke in a low voice, "Teyla brought a message for me from Belka."

John grabbed his towel from the top of his duffle bag and wiped the sweat from his head and neck before sitting beside Dex. Sheppard was aware that Teyla had just returned from a scheduled trade meeting on the planet. "From?"

"Solen."

John turned and leaned back against the sidewall so he could see Ronon better. "He your friend from Sateda?"

Ronon nodded.

"What's the problem?" John didn't know much about Ronon and Teyla's earlier encounter on Belka with Solen—he only knew that Ronon had finally discovered that several hundred of his people had survived the Wraith attack on Sateda by escaping through the stargate. That news alone should have left Dex elated, but when he and Teyla returned from Belka, there was an unspoken tension underlying their report about the news. John never had asked about it; he'd been too distracted with Rodney and the catastrophic events on Doranda.

"Every fourth season, on Sateda, we used to have a festival, the Festival of Yedeenorog." Ronon looked up. "It's a competition of sorts," he went on. "Warriors compete against warriors in displays of strength."

"Okay," John tried to hide the wariness in his voice, but was certain his trepidation was obvious. For some reason, the image coming to his mind was of roman gladiators fighting to the death.

Ronon read him easily and smiled. "It was a grand festival, the biggest we had," he assured. "We would have parades to honor the warriors. Our Storytellers would recount the year's events through song. There were presents and sweets for the warriors," he paused, his smile growing. "The old women prepare great feasts to honor those that are found worthy - every kind of food imaginable."

"And the younger women?"

"They found their own ways to honor the warriors."

If it was possible for Dex to show embarrassment, John could have sworn Ronon was blushing. "I'll bet."

John relaxed as he watched Ronon's posture. From the way the younger man suddenly became at ease with describing his people's tradition, John could tell that this festival had been an important part of Satedan life, it reminded the colonel of Christmas back on Earth.

"I'm guessing the annual festival came to an end when the Wraith destroyed the place?"

Ronon nodded, his eyes clouding briefly with anger. "But...Solen has informed me that a small number of my people have decided to try to have the festival this season."

"Where?" John asked. "Are they going back to Sateda?"

"No." Dex shook his head, his thick dreads falling about his face, hiding the sadness that John knew was there. He remembered the scenes that the MALP had sent back of Ronon's world. No one would be returning there for a long time. "They have arranged for the festival to be held on another planet."

"Belka?"

"No, it is not one that I'm familiar with, but Solen sent the ring address."

"You want to go," John stated firmly.

Shrugging, Ronon pushed himself to his feet. "It has been so long." He shook his head, obviously torn about his choices.

"All the more reason to go, isn't it?" John grinned.

"I am not the same man." Ronon's voice filled with bitterness.

John nodded. "No, I can't imagine anyone is the same after all this time." Slowly, grimacing, Sheppard stood. "When is the festival? How long does it last?"

"It is a three day festivity and has already begun. The second day is ending, but the contests between the greatest of the warriors occur on the final day - tomorrow." A longing seemed to pull at the Satedan's face as he concluded quietly, "It is the best of all days to attend."

John grabbed his bag and shoved his towel into it before flipping the strap over his shoulder. "Want company?"

Ronon's eyes widened with surprise. "I didn't say that I would go," he muttered.

With a shrug, Sheppard asked, "Yeah, but if I went, you'd come too, wouldn't you?"

"You would come with me?"

"Sure. You're part of my team right?" John turned for the door. "I think we all could use a chance to get away and check out something new. Of course now we just need to convince Elizabeth that it's a good idea."

**TBC**

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It's been a long time since I had a story posting so I am desiring comments. Give them to me.


	2. 2:The Tacticians

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER TWO: THE TACTICIANS**

Elizabeth sat at her desk and listened with amusement as John tried a series of different persuasion tactics on her as he made his case to visit the festival. The colonel presented his case, moving from respectful chain-of-command verbiage to carefully doled out charm and back again.

"Besides offering us the prospect of aligning with additional allies, this is a prime opportunity to practice some of that…" he gestured casually with one hand while trying to remember the correct buzz word, "team-building stuff." He inwardly winced. "And by 'stuff' I, of course, mean those valid exercises that Dr. Heightmeyer says are so important to…you know…team-building. And… stress relief."

Elizabeth bit down sharply on the inside of her lower lip to prevent a smile from revealing itself. She saw right through him. John knew this. Elizabeth was also aware that John knew that she knew that he knew she saw right through him. The colonel was looking for some good, old-fashioned R-'n-R for himself and his team. Elizabeth didn't mind.

Truth be told, she was enjoying watching him work. This was the least demanding negotiation session she'd participated in since that Ukrainian assembly in 2001. Though in that instance, the vodka was a major factor.

"And this festival lasts three days?" she asked.

"Yeah, but only one day is left by this point. We'd be gone for the day. Might stay the night if the mood takes us."

Elizabeth didn't give her answer right away. She had to make him sweat at least a little. The seconds of silence were taken up as she reflected on the dynamics she'd observed between John and Rodney over the previous few weeks. A subtle, awkward tension existed between the two men. What happened on Doranda was part of it, but it had been there before then...Doranda only seemed to exacerbate it. If she were being honest, it had been there since the P3M-736 - the planet where they had found Ronon...and truly lost Ford. The unease she sensed troubled her.

Fact was, the entire team's dynamic had shown signs of strain. Teyla had grown more aloof – always friendly, but never showing her true feelings for any of them. When they had first met her, she laughed more. She seemed to do that less and less. Ronon was still obviously unsure of his place here – the only people he seemed truly comfortable with were Sheppard and Teyla. Rodney...was still obviously a question mark to the Satedan.

She wondered if Sheppard was aware of just how true his words were - that his team really did need a team-building experience. Even more - they needed a vacation.

What was it that Twain said? she thought to herself, there's no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them.

She finally let a smile lighten her contemplative expression. "I think it's quiet enough around here. Atlantis should be able to operate securely enough while you and your team are…team-building."

John returned the grin, but only nodded in thanks before turning and heading out to inform Ronon and the others.

[{O}]

Rodney settled in to the co-pilot's seat as John finished the flight initiation sequence, but the fingertips of the scientist's left hand drummed a light, quick rhythm across the heavy fabric of his pants.

"What exactly did Elizabeth say were the scientific exploratory aspects of this mission?" The colonel had told them all where they were headed, yet Rodney felt like he was missing out on some great secret.

John focused more intently on the control panel and answered in a distracted tone. "You know…science stuff."

"I'm only asking because Dr. Simpson gets to go with Wu's team to P2C-115 to investigate the evidence of coronal mass ejection in relation to the planet's atmospheric radiocarbon levels. And honestly, if there isn't going to be anything on Manaria that really warrants my being there, my knowledge and experience would be of much more use on P2C–115."

John exchanged a quick look with Teyla, sitting behind Rodney. She and Ronon both had been present for Rodney's three previous discourses on why he would be better suited for the P2C-115 trip.

The colonel studied Rodney briefly before replying, "How much coffee have you had today?"

The puddle jumper vibrated as it responded to John's commands and powered up fully. "Look, Rodney, you're here. We're going. You're coming. I'm sure there will be all kinds of fascinating… aspects for you to explore on Manaria. Relax, you'll have a great time. Trust me." He shot a glance at the man beside him. "Can ya just do that?"

The look that flashed across Rodney's face made John instantly regret his choice of words. Trust wasn't exactly the best topic as of late. He hoped McKay didn't take the question as some kind of dig. He quickly turned his attention to the event horizon shimmering in front of them.

"This'll be just what we all need. We're all gonna have a great time."

**TBC - I'm just getting started**

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A/N: I am giving you two chapters today so you must give me at least one review. Two would be better.


	3. 3:The Yedeenorog

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER THREE: THE YEDEENOROG**

A/N: Ha ha ha ha! I bask in the glow of your feedback! It feeds me like food! Give me more!

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"Somehow I expected the festival to be a bit more...festive," McKay muttered, peering down the deserted streets of the Satedan settlement.

Sheppard cocked a disapproving eyebrow at the physicist, but privately had to agree. The refugee encampment was located far from the larger cities of the planet's native population. The houses here had a flimsy, temporary feel to them, as if they'd been thrown together by people who never expected to live in them this long.

Here and there, the drab shelters were livened up with garlands of flowers around the door lintels. Bright scraps of fabric fluttered from streamers that had been strung between buildings. Colorful flags snapped in the breeze.

But any cheer they might have brought to the scene was offset by the fact that the village - Set, Ronon had called it - was completely, eerily empty.

"Hellooo?" McKay called through an open window. He scowled back at his teammates. "Where is everybody? What is this? Brigadoon?" he asked. "What say we ditch the festival of the damned and head back before Simpson completely botches-?"

Sheppard and Teyla exchanged an eye-roll and kept walking, following Dex as he marched purposefully down the empty streets of Set, heading for the hillside beyond. McKay trundled after them, keeping up the running commentary of complaints the team had come to expect whenever they dragged the Canadian cross-country.

As they crested the hill, Dex pulled to a sudden halt. McKay, who had turned to complain because all the trees on this planet had purple leaves, collided with his shoulder.

"Would you watch where you're...Oh." McKay edged around the Satedan and stared at the sight below. "Oh my. That's...that looks..."

"Cool," Sheppard breathed, a loopy grin plastered on his face.

Below them, Yedeenorog was in full swing. The broad grassy valley was dotted with colorful striped tents, interspersed with smaller booths, crackling bonfires and the marked-off squares of playing fields where several competitions seemed to be underway. Laughter, music and the distant cheer of crowds floated up to their ears. Looking down on the festival, Sheppard half-expected to hear calliope music or see a Ferris wheel spinning slowly over the scene. He glanced over and saw McKay and Teyla grinning down at the festival, looking more relaxed than he'd seen them in weeks.

This, he decided, had been a great idea.

"This was a bad idea," Dex muttered softly.

Slowly, the others pivoted to stare at the Satedan.

Dex took a hesitant step back, looking very young and lost all of a sudden. "It's been a long time. I don't know these people anymore. I don't belong here."

Teyla caught his arm. "These are your people," she insisted. "You will always have a place among them."

But there was an odd note in her voice; one that Sheppard probably would have tried to analyze in more depth if he hadn't been distracted by a group of children on the hillside, shrieking and cheering at a cluster of bright shapes that were swooping and diving over their heads. Kites. He leaned forward longingly. Weird-shaped kites of alien construction, but kites nonetheless. He loved kites.

Dex was still trying to talk himself out of it. "Maybe we should just go back-"

This time, it was McKay who cut him off. "Whoa-whoa-whoa," he said, flapping a hand to silence the debate. He took a step closer to the festivities, sniffing the air like bloodhound. "What's that I smell?"

Intriguing scents were wafting to them on the breeze - sweet, salty, deep-fried smells familiar to anyone who spent any amount of time at carnivals or county fairs. And John Sheppard, connoisseur of Ferris wheels, had spent a lot of time at a lot of carnivals.

"Colonel?" Teyla's amused voice penetrated the haze of memory and snapped Sheppard back to the present.

He clapped Dex on the shoulder and gave him an encouraging shove downhill. "I don't suppose you people have gotten around to inventing Ferris wheels?"

[{O}]

"So how does this work?" McKay asked, bouncing on the balls of his feet as he eyed a concession stand larded with gooey pastries that gave off an intoxicating chocolaty aroma. "How much do those cost? What sort of currency do you people use? Didn't anybody think to bring some glass beads or trinkets to barter with the natives?"

Dex shrugged. "This is a warriors' festival," he said, as if that explained everything. He nodded to the pastry vendor, who was waving encouraging at them, a sweet cake in each hand. "I suppose the items have a price, but I've never had to pay. The vendors fall over themselves to offer their wares to the warriors. It's their way of honoring those who protect the weak and defenseless."

McKay's face fell.

Sheppard, however, was looking around at the crowd with new appreciation. There must be thousands of people here - far more than the few hundred who survived the culling of Sateda. Now that he was looking for them, the off-world warriors were easy to spot, strutting through the crowd, bristling with weapons and armor - and all but staggering under the gifts that had been pressed upon them.

"They just give stuff away?" Sheppard asked.

"To the warriors," Dex confirmed.

"And how do your people recognize a true warrior?" Teyla asked, watching as a group of young men swaggered up to the pastry vendor, then meekly handed over payment when the chef snatched back the treats they were reaching for.

"They know."

McKay crossed his arms and huffed in disgust. "Well that's just great. Meanwhile, what am I supposed to do? Wait for the Science Fair before I get something to eat?" He shot an annoyed glance at a snickering Sheppard.

"Here." Dex held something out to him. McKay blinked, recognizing the Wraith-bone charm the former Runner always wore.

"What? Why?" The scientist was obviously confused, not understanding the meaning.

When McKay made no move to put it on, Dex dropped the necklace over his head. "You wear that, you won't starve."

McKay stared down at the finger-bone dangling around his neck - clearly torn between disgust with the trophy and the lure of free food. He poked at it with a finger. "Please! It's going to take more than ugly jewelry to fool anyone into believing I'm a great warrior."

Dex shrugged and turned away. "From what these two have told me, you've killed more Wraith than half the soldiers here. That just makes sure everybody knows it." He started to walk away, tossing over his shoulder, "Just make sure you don't lose it."

He headed off into the crowd as McKay stared after him, dumbstruck. Teyla gave Sheppard a nod and McKay an encouraging smile, then strolled after him.

"Come on, mighty warrior," Sheppard clouted the scientist on the shoulder. "Let's get something to eat."

McKay followed, sneaking an occasional peek at the symbol of valor on his chest. He grimaced, strongly aware of just how "borrowed" it felt. Surely, the vendors were going to see right through it...

[{O}]

"Yours is an interesting culture, Ronon," Teyla said, graciously waving off an elderly man who was trying to press a beaded bracelet into her hands.

Dex peered out at her from under two garlands of flowers that had been draped over his hair. "How so?" he asked, accepting a loaf of crusty, warm bread from a giggling young girl. He ripped off a hunk and offered the rest of the loaf to Teyla.

By mutual consent, they leaned against a rough fence to share the bread and watch the competition underway in a nearby field.

"Well, for instance..." Teyla waved to the field. "What test of skill and strength might this be?"

In the center of the field stood a massive old tree; its trunk split with age and disease, its purple leaves withered and sparse. A line of young warriors - boys, mostly, with a few young women here and there - waited impatiently in a line for a chance to get close to the tree. Up against the trunk, a young man stood pressed against the cracked bark, trying to wedge himself into the cleft and split the tree in half entirely.

Dex let out a bark of laughter - the first real laugh Teyla had ever heard from him.

"It's an object lesson," he snorted. "From an ancient legend - about a warrior by the name of Kroton who had more muscles than brains. He was walking through the woods one day and decided to test his strength against the oldest tree in the forest. He wedged himself into a crack in the trunk and did his best to tear the tree to pieces. But the wood just snapped back into place, trapping him half-in, half-out of the tree."

Teyla eyed the young warriors as they contorted themselves into the narrow cleft in the trunk, straining mightily. "What happened then?"

"Then," Dex said blandly. "Wild beasts of the forest came upon him, trapped and helpless, and devoured him."

Teyla blinked.

"Come," Dex tossed away the heel of the bread loaf and caught her arm, tugging her away from the crowd around the tree. "You must come see the next event."

[{O}]

"That bone necklace really works, huh?" Sheppard grumbled, watching sourly as McKay collected another armload of treats from a smiling vendor.

The merchant turned to Sheppard, taking in his weapon and uniform but clearly undecided whether he fell into the category of warrior or wannabe. Sheppard made a face at him. "Never mind." He snagged a pastry out of McKay's fingers.

Rodney bit into the treat in his left hand instead. "For food like this? I'd wear that bone through my nose." Magnanimously, he offered another tidbit to the colonel - a savory meat pasty of some sort. Sheppard ate it in two bites and looked around for someplace new to wave McKay's miraculous bone necklace.

They walked in amiable silence for a while, pausing now and then to gape at the sights - a tall poll that shot out a continuous cascade of multicolored sparks, a livestock display crammed with a bizarre collection of creatures. And, to McKay's delight, a booth hawking an odd assortment of rubbish that included a few items of clearly Ancient origin.

Sheppard managed to drag Rodney away only after they both pawed every object to see if any would turn on. None did, although McKay did pocket a device that looked something like an Atlantis-issue data pad.

"Play with your toys later, Rodney," Sheppard chided, leading the way toward one of the competition fields. This one looked like an improvised racetrack. "What say we watch some of these feats of strength Ronon was talking ab-awk!" The sentence ended with a yelp as he finally caught sight of the athletes.

They stared with identical expressions of slack-jawed shock. McKay recovered first. "Why..." His voice came out as a squeak. He cleared his throat and tried again. "Why…are they naked?"

If Sheppard could have collected his scattered wits, he might have been able to answer that question. As it was, all his dazed brain could do was agree that yes, all the athletes on the field were indeed naked. "Quite naked," he mumbled. "Very nude."

"Naked...ladies," McKay croaked beside him, eyes bulging at the footrace before them. The runners were rounding the curve in the track and heading straight for them.

They moved closer to the edge of the track, jostling for the best view.

One runner was lengths ahead of the rest of the pack, running with an easy, loose-limbed stride that ate the ground. Head and shoulders taller than the other women, her tawny hair streamed over her golden shoulders as she sprinted forward effortlessly.

They drew closer, bare feet pounding the earth, each runner grinning fiercely at the crowd as she darted by. McKay felt his heart skip a beat as the lead runner whipped around the track and her dark blue gaze locked with his.

Suddenly, those flashing eyes narrowed.

The next thing McKay knew, he was flying backward.

He landed with a painful thump, with a furious naked woman kneeling on his chest.

"Ow," McKay wheezed, rolling his eyes toward Sheppard in silent appeal. But the colonel stood frozen, clearly not sure how to help, or even if McKay needed rescuing.

Was this what Dex had in mind when he mentioned that the young women had their own ways of "honoring" the warriors?

McKay glanced at his attacker again, then quickly screwed his eyes shut, blushing furiously. He felt a finger trace a line from his chin, down his chin and come to rest against his chest, where the bone necklace rested. Her long, strong fingers curled in a fist, twisting the hide cord until it tightened around his neck like a garrote

"Tell me," the young woman purred in a low, husky voice. "Where you stole this..." She flexed her knees and McKay felt his ribs creak. "Before I snap you in half."

**TBC**

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A/N: You liked this chapter, didn't you? Well, how could you not! There's a carnival and naked women! Leave me feedback and let me know how it changed your life. If you didn't like this chapter then there is something wrong with you. Now excuse me while I look for my lizard.


	4. 4:The Reunion

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER FOUR: THE REUNION**

A/N: Your feedback continues to make me happy. And when I am happy everyone in the farmyard is happy. Don't make that change.

[{O}]

"Hey," John called, schooling his simple word. He reached out one hand, and considered resting it on the large and perfectly-formed woman's shoulder, but something about her nudity made him hesitate. Honestly, he didn't want to tussle with her – one never really wanted to restrain a naked person in a fight. It was so hard to find something to hang onto that didn't – well – cause great embarrassment for everyone involved. And then there was the 'slippery' factor.

So John said, "Hey," again. "I think we have a little misunderstanding going on here, so if you'd just get off my friend and…"

"Where did you get this!" she spat out, clearly ignoring the man who hovered just behind her. John tried not to stare at her sculpted ass – it was a lovely one.

McKay squeezed his eyes shut so that he didn't have to gaze directly at the pert breasts just above him. "I… I…" he got out, his mouth dry as the cord remained tight at his throat. "I just…" and he gasped as she ground her knees into his ribs and hardly let him breathe. Oh crap! He was certain that she was going to stave in his ribcage, or at least shatter one of the bones. Yeah, one on the right – just below his nipple…. nipple.

McKay allowed himself to squint up at the woman – finding the breasts still there – so close – so close. Other things too – not so far away. The pretty face twisted in rage. Her luscious lips twisted in a snarl. Oh yes, she was going to kill him. "Ergh," was all he got out.

"Now, look," Sheppard stated, unable to stop himself from smiling at McKay's predicament. "Look, we can work this out. Just…"

The Amazon seemed to anger even further. "I asked you where you stole this from!" she shouted, then yanked on the necklace, as if she might be able to bust it right off Rodney's neck, but the cord holding it was strong and it didn't give.

McKay just made a pathetic sound and squeezed his eyes shut again. So this was how he was going to die – squashed by a giant warrior woman. All things considered, it wasn't the worst way to go. The story about dying while saving all those kids was a good one – but this one would work well in the right circles.

Around them, the crowd had drawn back to give them room – watching intensely. The other racers had moved on. Apparently, seeing their biggest competition drop out of the race was a boon for their own chances and the runners weren't about to give it up. They continued, their bare feet tramping the dirt as they went.

The gorgeous athlete yanked again on the cord, jerking up McKay's head. Her vicious attempt to remove the necklace was enough to put Sheppard in motion. Not that he actually 'wanted' to get involved in this, but he couldn't let a giant naked woman break the neck of the head of their science department. All things being equal, he'd rather they worked it out without him. Girding his loins, the colonel stepped forward, and reached for her (naked) shoulders to throw her off the trapped man.

But she was too quick for him. In one smooth moment, she rolled off of the scientist, and got to her feet, hoisting McKay along with her – one hand twisted into his jacket, the other still clenching the necklace.

McKay went, "Gah!" as he stumbled for footing.

She was as striking as she was statuesque, her beauty unmatched. The men in the crowd around her sighed with their admiration, instantly falling in love for her, willing to give up their lives and their property just for the chance to be with her. Even a few of the women fell under the spell.

Her lovely dark-blonde hair cascaded over her bare shoulders and shone like gold in the sunlight. Her eyes were an unmatchable shade of blue – deeper than a pure azure lake, clearer than a cerulean sky, more cobalt than cobalt. Every inch of her was perfection. She stood, a masterpiece, just begging to be set in marble so that generations might appreciate her beauty.

Flawless and awe-inspiring, she didn't even appear to be sweating from her run, as her gorgeous hand, with nails that naturally looked fresh from the manicurist (but of course weren't), clutched the length of cord that was attached to the sputtering, red-faced scientist.

Sheppard shook his head. Of course, this couldn't be easy. Why couldn't they just go to a fair and have fun for a change? Seeing an opening, he stepped in, shouldering in between McKay and the big woman. He managed to put some space between them by inserting himself, but she never let loose her grip on the necklace.

Nose to nose – chest to … breast, John dropped a hand to his gun. "Let him go," he stated, his voice low and impossible to resist.

The tawny-haired woman, strangely enough, smiled at him, delightfully, looking pretty as all hell – and resisted. Giving the boney necklace a yank, she pulled McKay from his semi-protected position behind Sheppard and tugged him onto the now vacant running track.

"Hey! Hey! Hey!" McKay got out, staggering as she led him, hands grappling at the binding around his neck.

The crowd around them moved uneasily, watching, waiting. A glance to them, and Sheppard knew exactly where their favor lay. The beautiful blonde was bewitching – there was no doubting that. Heck, if she wasn't currently trying to pop the head off his friend, John might have been on their side.

He sighed, wanting out of this. "Okay, enough is enough!" he shouted, his hand still ready on his weapon. They were here for a festival, and he had no intention on drawing on these people - but he didn't want this to escalate any further.

"Attention, noble people of Sateda!" she called, her voice booming. "I have discovered a traitor, a cowering thief! A man who has stolen glory from those more deserving." She kept her fierce grip on the bone necklace, pulling McKay to his tiptoes. "Here stands a pariah, impersonating one of our warriors, just so that he might partake in what he does not deserve!"

She glared at the remnants of their little feast – squashed pastries were scattered where McKay had been ambushed. "He pretended to be a soldier to deceive our fair people." She lowered her voice and growled at her captive, "And you believed your deceit wouldn't be discovered?"

It was all going to hell in a hand-basket, and it was time to end this. "Let him go," Sheppard demanded, resisting the urge to pull his weapon. He understood that warriors, who obviously sided with the magnificent blonde, surrounded him. A display of a weapon might be a very bad choice at this moment. If he could just 'talk her down' before she strangled McKay, everything would be fine.

"Thief, where did you get this?" she snarled.

"He said I could wear it," McKay squeaked out. "I didn't…"

She scowled, but managed to still look beautiful. She flicked her head to one side, letting her locks snap around her head. "The man who owned this would never give it to such a mealy creature as you, and you would never have been able to take it from him - not while he still lived. And, if you had murdered him, it could only have been through treachery. How did you get this?"

Before Sheppard could make another attempt to pull them apart, a form stepped in and did exactly that.

"I gave it to him." Ronon shoved McKay back and broke the woman's grip on the necklace.

McKay stumbled away, nearly falling into Teyla who caught him, steadying him. He gave her a grateful nod, rubbing at his neck and wheezing.

"A loan," Dex stated, holding out one hand, open palmed, toward McKay, while his eyes stayed on the nude warrior. Without hesitation, McKay pulled the necklace over his head and gave it to Ronon. Dex closed his fingers over the cord and let it hang at his side.

They stared at each other - the former Runner and the woman racer. Sheppard wasn't sure what he saw in their eyes - surprise, shock, apprehension, love? He glanced to McKay and found the scientist glaring the woman, but apparently unable to find a comfortable place to keep his gaze.

"Ronon?" the woman spoke his name hesitantly. "Ronon? I never… I never believed it could be true." Her brilliant eyes became moist in emotion.

At that statement, Dex made a little grunt. "I'm surprised as well," he returned.

With that, she surged forward, leaping, wrapping her arms around Ronon's neck, strapping legs around his waist, and giving him a full-body hug. As Ronon embraced the naked woman, Sheppard couldn't help but think he looked a little uncomfortable - okay, more than a little.

Teyla left McKay and came alongside Sheppard, her brow furrowed at the sight. McKay judiciously kept some space between himself and the woman, muttering disconsolately as he turned his head this way and that.

"Ronon?" Sheppard prompted. "Care to introduce us to …"

Looking a little beleaguered, Dex let out a sigh, and spoke over the top of her head, "Colonel Sheppard, Teyla Emmagan, Doctor McKay." He paused as if it pained him. "This is my sister, Nonor Dex."

Teyla and Sheppard exchanged started glances. McKay blinked furiously, saying in a pitched tone, "Your sister? She almost broke my neck!"

[{O}]

Nonor had excitedly led them to her private tent, and donned what might be considered 'appropriate garb'. "We shall see to a feast!" she told the Athosian. "A feast befitting a warrior such as my brother!" And she kissed Ronon, sweetly, on the cheek before she exited the tent, tugging Teyla along with her. She giggled, holding onto the Athosian's arm as if they were the closest of friends.

And once they had gone, the three men sat in silence, in the dimness of the tent.

"Well," McKay finally voiced, rubbing at his neck, which had begun to show the first signs of bruising. "That was your sister."

"Yeah, sister…" Sheppard trailed off. "You never said anything about having a sister. Can't remember you ever mentioning your family."

Ronon sat with his arms crossed over his chest. "I can't remember you ever speaking of family either," he pointedly told Sheppard and then fixed McKay with the same look. "I had no intention of speaking of mine."

"Oh," McKay answered, stepping away from Ronon's glance. "I can understand that, thoroughly. Some things…" and he trailed off. He said nothing further, rubbing his neck as he paced and looking unsettled. And the three men were silent again for a moment. Outside, the festive sounds of Yedeenorog filtered through.

Ronon let out a breath, appreciating the lack of conversation, the lack of questioning. He felt rather proud of himself for silencing the pair. Maybe this wouldn't be as painful as he had thought. But Sheppard kept a scrutinizing watch on him, as McKay wandered close to the tent flap and gazed out at the activity.

Finally, McKay seemed to snap out of the silence when he turned suddenly and stated, "You, Ronon have one HELL of a sister."

Ronon grimaced, realizing he wasn't going to escape. "Yes, I do," he agreed.

"I mean, first off, she was naked. Nakedness – you know is something…" McKay fluttered his hands at the thought. "…something different. I'm not used to seeing naked ladies run down the road and leaping on me. That sort of thing doesn't happen every day!"

Sheppard smirked at this comment, and allowed himself a curt laugh.

For that, McKay fixed him with a stare and muttered, "Okay, might be different for you – but for me – it was a shock. Then she ALMOST BROKE MY NECK!" McKay cried. "Really, she could have killed me. If she didn't kill me outright, she could have paralyzed me - or … crushed me." He shook his head, wincing at the movement. "My neck's going to hurt for weeks."

"It's not that bad," Sheppard tried to assure.

"Easy for you to say!" McKay went on, "Really, if I hadn't had it all displayed in front of me like that, I would have wondered whether she was a really woman at all. She's built like a bear. Well, not a bear, because she's pretty good looking. I probably just said bear because she was… bare. Okay, got that, but she's huge! Like some sort of animal that's really big and powerful and … big. Did I mention that she's big?"

"McKay," Sheppard said under his breath. "Need I remind you that you're talking about Ronon's sister?"

"And bare. That's the naked sort of 'bare' not the 'Grrrargh' sort of bear." McKay still tenderly moved his head back and forth. "You shouldn't let your sister run around like that, Ronon. Naked and all. People will talk."

Ronon didn't respond. Instead he just growled softly, rather like a bruin in hyperphasia.

"McKay, let it go," Sheppard said, noting the strange, sober mood Dex seemed to be in.

"Someone should really talk to her about that," McKay continued, oblivious. "You think Teyla and your sister will bring back some more of those little _pasties_?" McKay held out both hands like little cups, indicating the size and shape of the preferred cakes. "The ones with all the sugar and that cherry-like thing on top?"

Sheppard ignored McKay's latest comments, and regarded the Specialist, wondering what was going on.

McKay's expression changed, as, chagrinned, he added, "Okay, I meant to say '_pastries'_!" He let his hands drop when it appeared no pastries or pasties were forthcoming. "Man...you know, my neck really hurts..."

[{O}]

Teyla hurried to keep up with Nonor. The Athosian was nimble, and used to quick movement, but the long stride of Ronon's sister kept her hopping.

They careened through the festival village, past tents and booths that displayed their wares for those that deserved them. The sellers fawned over Nonor as the two scurried by. The vendors were eager to give the tall warrior just about anything she wanted – but Nonor was intent on reaching only certain destinations.

They stopped at one booth that looked rather like all the others, offering the same sorts of things, and Nonor spoke excitedly to the man within, ordering this and that, shaking her head at other offerings - and they were off again - searching out a feast befitting of a warrior such as Ronon. They stopped here - but not there - onward to a booth three doors down, then again to an opening four windows further.

Everywhere they went, the vendors looked at her with great love and admiration.

"My brother has always been a great warrior, possibly the greatest male Sateda has had in ten generations," Nonor said proudly. "He nearly reaches my level of excellence. There are so few who can match my skill in everything." And her proud look increased. "But my brother, of course, is special."

"You must have been very close," Teyla commented.

With an eager nod, Nonor explained, "He was my wonderful companion when we were children. I was his shadow, more interesting in playing the games of warriors than the games of those that are not." She smiled sweetly at a memory. "I was with him when he killed his first Wraith. I helped." Her eyes blazed with satisfaction. "He became a man at that moment and has worn the talisman at his neck ever since. It was great when I last laid eyes on it, but he has added to it since then." And she blew out a breath, looking proud and pleased. "I have a similar one myself, perhaps it is even grander, but I thought it would be too showy to wear at the competitions. I wouldn't want to make my fellow athletes realize their inferiority so soon."

"Has it been long?" Teyla asked as she hurried alongside Nonor. "Since you last saw your brother?"

"So many years," Nonor stated as she kept the quick clip. "We had thought him culled. Gone. Forever." She paused, her full lips quivering and her sapphire eyes welling as she took a moment to compose herself in mid-stride. "Life was so difficult after the Wraith took him. I suffered greatly."

With a sniff, Nonor seemed to pulled herself together. "But I am strong. I persevered. I am a Dex! It is a great joy to my heart to find him alive."

"They why are you not with him now?" Teyla asked. "If I were to find one who was lost to me, I would be unable to leave his side."

Nonor laughed. "But he will be hungry."

"He has eaten," Teyla responded.

"But he must have a feast," Nonor insisted. "He is a warrior and they are always hungry. And, I know my brother. It is what he would want. Later, we will talk." And she made a little gasp of delight as she found another booth. They stopped - she ordered - and they went onward - madly pounding through the carnival city. The dash only stopped when they came to a crowd of people, surrounding a little arena. She came to a halt – watching and listening as a dog might, upon hearing a whistle in the distance.

"Oh!" Nonor exclaimed, her voice high and overjoyed. She stretched her considerable height to see over the crowd. "Oh yes!" she cried. "It's what I thought! Come! Come see! This will be my favorite event. The best of them all." She shoved her way into the crowd. People gave way, some begrudgingly – but they all gave way. "I was to participate against an able opponent, but she has resigned from the competition when she heard that she would be facing me. She knew she couldn't best me. It is a pity. I won by default. I will have no final competition." Soon Teyla and Nonor were against the rope that was strung along poles at thigh level, surrounded the grassy area.

The arena itself was empty except for a tent at one end, and one man, who stood at the opening to the tent. Nonor looked on, enraptured, excitedly tugging on Teyla's arm. "It's about to start," she confided eagerly.

Then, two women came out of the crowd, stepping over the fence at the far side. With purposeful strides, they made their way into the arena.

A cheer went up, as the women warriors, garbed in simple form-fitting clothing, met at the center. They lowered their heads, bowing to each other. The man came to them – an official of some sort. And the three spoke together for a moment. The man presented them with their weapons.

Teyla cocked her head, seeing the fighting sticks that she was so familiar with. The women chose from what was offered to them, and stepped back. They moved into position, and following a shout from the man officiating, the fight commenced.

For all their previous hurrying, Nonor seemed perfectly content to stand still and watch, her gaze fastened on the battle. Teyla split her attention between the fight and Ronon's sister. Nonor leaned on the fence, making the rope creak. She watched the spectacle, enraptured.

It went on for several moments, wood cracking against wood, the grunting of the women, the sound of a tussle, someone took a fall and got back to her feet - then the other tumbled. And then, with a shout from the official it was over. A winner was declared and Nonor made a disappointed sound. "A poor match," she muttered as the official brought a trinket from the tent and presented it to the victor. "Hardly spirited. We shall stay for the next one."

And they stayed as two men came to the field. They were surer fighters. Teyla appreciated their speed and intensity. One, she decided, was more experienced than the other. She smiled slightly, anticipating the moves of the less-skilled one, knowing exactly how he'd move and how he should be countered. In the end, it was a good fight that could have been better.

Nonor let out a sigh, sounding disappointed when the fight ended and another prize awarded. She turned her head swiftly to meet Teyla's gaze, seeing something in her glance. "You are familiar with this style of fighting?" she asked.

Teyla lifted her head assuredly. "Yes," she proclaimed. "I have participated."

"And you are … good?"

"Yes," Teyla assured. "I am… good."

Narrowing her pretty blue eyes, Nonor asked, "How good?"

Drawing up to her full height, Teyla said, "Very."

Nonor beamed. "Great!" she cried. She raised a hand and flailed it at the official. "Then, I have found an able competitor! We will be next!"

**TBC** – CHICK FIGHT!

[{O}]

A/N: This story continues to be outstanding. If you have read this far, then you must agree. Leave me feedback to let me know how much you adore me. To do otherwise would be wrong and would make me unhappy. You don't want a bitter Genii to be unhappy.


	5. 5:The Thrashing

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER FIVE: THE THRASHING**

_A/N: To you who write me feedback - you are good citizens and I applaud your commitment to me. Reading my story is a good and noble cause, and leaving me comments is even better. To flah7 - I have heard your cries and your beloved Beckett will poke his head into this chapter. He shall appear more prominently later, I promise you._

_A/N: To you who do not write feedback to me - you know who you are. I have caught a chicken that was scratching in the yard and have put it in a box. If I do not get more feedback I will cut the head off the chicken - and I will cook it (maybe with a little rosemary) and I will eat it. Peggy's life is in your hands. _

_A/N: My OFC is NOT a Mary Sue. Sure, she's beautiful beyond words, and perfect in every way, but her name is Nonor. She belongs solely to me, but if the folks who write for the television program want to borrow her, they will have to wrestle me for her. And just a warning - I fight dirty._

[{O}]

A warm sun beat down on the grass playing fields. A soft breeze kept the heat at bay and dried sweat as it beaded on skin and soaked the clothing of some participants.

In one small section, with a single small rope delineating the boundaries of the playing field, two women warriors stood facing one another ready to do battle.

One was a tall robust woman, her golden hair pulled back into a tight pony tail exposing sharp features, full lips and large, startling, diamond-blue eyes which seemed to sparkle in the light. She moved heavily. Her footfalls were solid, bending grass and leaving imprints. Taut muscles bunched and knotted over unmarred skin, protecting a heavy skeleton. Thick boned wrists twirled her fighting sticks with blinding speed. A grim thin-lined smile hardened her features, highlighting her fierce concentration.

The second woman was much smaller, finer-boned and elegantly toned. She moved with the sophistication and grace of a hunting cat. Her bare feet seemed to glide over the grass without bending a blade. Her dark eyes warily watched her much larger opponent. A small smile curled the edges of her delicate mouth, giving an added softness and openness to a friendly face. Her hair too was pulled back into a ponytail, though loose strands seemed to pull free at a whim and dance unrestrained in the breeze as if matching the spirit within the body. Her beauty was unmatched.

Her skill was yet to be tested.

Teyla sidestepped confidently, twirling her stick around her hand with such speed it made the air sing. She held her other stick before her as she circled Nonor.

The Athosian kept her eyes on the taller woman's chest, knowing that a head could feint left or right or could mime an attack and spring a trap. The head was flexible and deceiving. It could move without the rest of the body and force a lesser opponent into moving foolishly.

Teyla continued to circle, careful never to cross her bare feet on the short grass. She felt constricted in the tight confines of her SGA issued pants but could do nothing to change it. She had sparred in such constricting clothing before and would do so again.

She would adapt. She had to.

She continued to twirl her back right hand, her power stick, while her left remained out front, on guard, waiting like a sentry.

Teyla looked forward to testing her skill against Ronon's sister. Nonor appeared a worthy opponent.

The Athosian stared straight ahead, making her challenger match her moves, circling to the right, which somehow felt unnatural on this planet. She focused solely on the towering Nonor.

The sounds of the crowd faded as Teyla became more focused. The feel of the hundreds of grass blades tickling her ankles disappeared.

The swirl of the stick in her power hand whispered in the air, comforting the twitter of butterflies that patted within her stomach. Teyla watched Nonor's chest. The torso would not move unless the body was committed to movement. The torso did not deceive in stick fighting, not like the head or eyes of an opponent.

Nonor attacked.

Her attack was fast and furious. The warrior leaped in, brandishing her sticks before her like twin blades rotating in opposite directions. Teyla's guard stick was caught and whipped to the side, clearing the way for the flashing of Nonor's left stick. It came crashing down toward the Athosian's skull.

Teyla snapped her head to the side escaping the blow as she leaped to the right and slightly back. She was careful to avoid backing in a straight line thus allowing her attacker to continue her assault at the same angle.

The ferocity and brutal power of the attack surprised Teyla.

This was to be a friendly bout. One trained with friends, practiced with comrades, sparred with fellow athletes.

One fought only with the true enemy.

Teyla leaped right, feeling the motion unnatural, confusing her and causing her to think.

Thinking paused instinct.

Nonor stick lashed out and connected solidly with the side of Teyla's neck. Shocking pain lanced up and down Teyla's neck blinding her momentarily and numbing her side.

This was no sparring match. Nonor fought to inflict pain.

The Athosian immediately snapped an arm up, rolling Nonor's stick away and attacked the extended forearm with her second stick, her power arm.

Nonor pivoted easily, her long hairless arms outstretched, twirling and swinging her sticks with the repetitive speed of hummingbird wings.

Teyla dove to the ground and shoulder-rolled to the left, seamlessly gaining her feet. Pain was blocked and smothered. There would be time to lick one's wounds and tend deep bruises when the fighting was done. One could only heal if they survived. To survive, one must stay in the fight and be victorious.

This was not a training session amongst friends or acquaintances.

Teyla settled down in her stance, lowering her center of gravity. She held her guard stick forward and continued to twirl her power stick just low behind her hip. The movement was comforting, soothing. Her heartbeat slowed and breathing evened out as her stick spun effortlessly behind her.

The Athosian circled the larger woman, knowing that in a match between evenly skilled combatants, strength, weight and reach would favor the bigger person. Speed and agility did not often garner enough of an advantage for the smaller quicker fighter.

Nonor was truly of mythical proportions. She rivaled her brother in height, weight and reach.

Teyla circled, keeping herself from Nonor's reach, which unfortunately cut herself from her own form of attacking.

The Athosian stared at Nonor's chest and realized her opponent did not gasp or fight for breath. She was not winded.

Teyla ignored the free strings of hair that clung to her forehead. She did not feel the sweat that beaded her skin and glistened in the sunlight.

Teyla swung her sticks, taking comfort in the hiss as they cut cleanly through the air with no hint of a warble. She attacked. Teyla came in low, feinting with her guard stick as her power stick whistled through the air on a horizontal plain aiming for Nonor's knee.

Teyla would apologize to Ronon later. Doctor Beckett could fix just about anything, Nonor would not be permanently injured. She needed to end this now before someone got truly hurt.

Nonor fought too much like her brother, and where Teyla trusted Ronon, she did not know or trust his sister yet.

Teyla's stick sliced in cleanly, blindly cutting through the air with a blurring speed.

A stick shot down and connected with Teyla's power swing, easily deflecting it outward in a wider arc forcing it outside its circumference of maximum damage. Teyla's strike finishing strike was deflected.

With the stick redirected wide, Teyla's right side was exposed. She tried to twist away to avoid the devastating blow that was sure to fall.

Had she been sparring with a friend, training with one of the Atlantians, she would welcome the slight bruise as a learning aid - a reminder that she had become careless, overconfident in her own prowess.

Her carelessness here earned her a punishing blow that snapped her lower right ribs and tore intercostals muscles from their origins and insertions. Veins broke, tiny arterioles tore and nerves screamed.

Teyla pirouetted around on the ball of her foot, bringing her left arm up to protect herself as her right side flared in crushing pain. Nonor was there, knocking her left stick to the side and closed in flailing her sticks like a club hunter.

Teyla felt the first set of blows crash across her right shoulder blade. The second strike swung up from the ground like a vicious uppercut hoping to stand up a failing fighter for one more solid blow.

The stick cracked under Teyla's mandible snapping her head back arching it brutally revealing the soft underside of her neck, exposing the stretched tracheal rings hidden under ineffectual thin muscle and skin. Her collarbones became prominent and unprotected as she was flung backward, the back of her head nearly touching between her shoulder blades.

Teyla saw the blur of a stick heading for her. She twirled on her faltering balance. Her inner ear sent conflicting data to her brain as her eyes only caught rotary movements. She twisted away on a collapsing leg as the whirling stick came crashing down on her exposed extended collarbone.

She heard a plaintive cry somewhere amongst the hazy grey world. She lost feeling in one of her hands but couldn't fathom which one.

Teyla hit the ground and rolled. Instinct and a life of fighting kept her from giving up. She still held her sticks. She still breathed, could still move. She would continue to fight. This was a fight with the enemy.

Teyla rolled again, somersaulting at an angle, working on instinct, listening only to the feeling of her feet on the grass, her brain ignored the sensory input of the inner ear. Teyla felt the whistling air of a near miss. She pivoted, rotating from her hip to her feet and attacked before her opponent could adjust to the new angle.

The Athosian attacked swiftly, brutally. Teyla stormed in on her larger, stronger opponent swinging her sticks in controlled powerful arcs. The soft curve of a gentle smile was replaced by the snarl of a predator not used to being cornered.

The clickity-click of sticks resounded through the area. Teyla pressed onward. She swung her sticks, lashed out in controlled fury with her damaged lower jaw tucked in tight to her sternum. She struck blow after blow, connected repeatedly with sticks that deflected her attacks, and still she pressed forward, refusing to give ground. She took no pleasure when her sticks hit solid tissue. Through muscle memory, her body moved with the assurance and grace only witnessed with a lifetime of training and fighting.

Teyla would not lose this fight because she would not quit. She would not lose this fight because she was tired or beaten. The Wraith did not care for such things and thus Teyla and her people trained accordingly.

The Athosian continued swinging and attacking, using her arms and calling strength from damaged muscles and protesting joints. She defied nay-sayers that believed in only the physical strength of the body, that dismissed the spirit that raged deep within the body.

Teyla continued to attack in a controlled efficient frenzy.

[{O}]

Nonor deflected most strikes. She took a blow to her ribs that caused her to blink. She took a solid hit to her elbow that numbed her fingers.

Nonor was forced to back away from the wild Athosian that pressed her swirling sticks and revealed a raging spirit.

Nonor had known many opponents but none fought with the deadly intensity or endurance of Ronon's pretty little friend.

Nonor felt herself tire, felt her shoulders ache, her hands were sweaty, the grips on her sticks were waning. She felt short of breath. Her heart raced. The fight was becoming too much of an effort.

Still this little woman continued to attack her. She was like a stinging insect on a hot humid day. Nonor continued to swat at her, but the nimble little creature continued onward, attacking, attacking, attacking.

Nonor Dex began to worry. She could not lose before her people, not in front of her brother, though her brother was in the tent with the little funny men. He would find out and he would be disappointed - she could not disappoint her brother.

Nonor could not lose to this diminutive, primitive woman. She was sure she had already broken some of tiny woman's fragile bones.

When would this nuisance quit?

Nonor continued to back in a straight line. She was forced to block blow after hand-numbing blow. Nonor heard the crowd cheer for the little woman in the funny dress.

The spectators cheered for the small alien with tiny laughable sticks that should not carry the bite and sting that they did. Nonor felt her face grow red with the heat of exertion and embarrassment. This was no nuisance - she was actually being outmatched! She had never been outmatched. That could not happen! Not here, not now, not with her brother back with her and so near. It was time to end this now.

Nonor felt herself backed into a corner. If she was forced from the ring, then she lost.

A corner flag flapped at the nape of her neck. The little Athosian stung at her from the front, her flying sticks leaving angry welts, one or two strong enough to break Nonor's fine skin.

Nonor made a desperate lunge for the flag.

[{O}]

Teyla attacked and attacked. She was oblivious to her pain. She fought the enemy. With directed energy and no wasted movement, Teyla attacked the Satedan. She would win this contest and then go the jumper and wait for the others. She would tend her wounds in private and apologize to Ronon later.

Teyla swung her power stick up from behind her hip and found it suddenly foiled in red and white cloth.

The cloth billowed in one section while another knotted and blunted her power stick. Her arm faltered. She struck out with her left, seamlessly switching from right-handed to left-handed as her father had taught her a lifetime ago. He had made her practice everyday, three times a day. Left and right should make no difference in a master fighter.

The cloth came down tight, trapping her other stick and then covering her head.

Teyla dropped her head and charged forward into her opponent, uncaring of the reason behind the deceitfulness, but recognizing it for what it was…treachery.

Teyla never saw the sticks that pummeled her head and shoulders. She was forced to her knees, folding to her hands as blow after blow landed on her body from outside the red suffocating cloth.

Through the frantic beat of her heart and heaving rasping of her breath, she thought she heard the familiar voice of Doctor McKay shouting frantically and furiously for someone to stop, and calling for Colonel Sheppard. She heard his heavy steps running towards her, coming to save her, and she focused on them, needing to know he was coming...

A fierce blow snapped the back of Teyla's cloth shrouded neck. Pain exploded in her skull.

Then all went dark.

[{O}]

Teyla became aware of the pain first. Lancing fiery pain seared the back of her head and felt as if the bones of her neck were shoved too far into her skull. Her shoulders burned.

She moaned and rolled her head but stopped abruptly as something grated within her neck. It felt strangely numb. She tried opening her eyes. They felt swollen and tacky. She attempted to work moisture back into her parched mouth. Teyla attempted to manipulate her lower jaw but unmatched agony exploded forth.

She cried out, sparking a vicious cyclone of paralyzing pain that forced her to tense muscles that in turn shifted bones. She cried out again, fisting a hand tightly, not recognizing the returning grip of Dr. McKay.

"Oh God, Oh God."

Teyla heard the words repeated over and over and wondered if Rodney knew what was wrong with her.

She tried to open her eyes again. The upper and lower lid of one unpeeled and she stared through a blurry film at the inside of a red and white striped tent.

The world pitched and rolled.

Her stomach rebelled. Vomit erupted and spewed forth, forcing her to open her mouth wide. Her lower jaw shifted, her back arched and something shifted unnaturally in her neck.

Teyla screamed, choking on her partially digested stomach contents.

"Oh God, oh God -Teyla, don't do this; hold on, Teyla. The Colonel's getting Beckett -we couldn't risk moving you far…your neck…" McKay's voice sounded far off. He sounded scared.

Teyla had trust in Dr. McKay, more trust than the man had in himself when it came to things not connected with his laptop.

She felt a set of hands roll her onto her sore ribs.

She whimpered. It was a plaintive sound that had her wishing she would succumb to unconsciousness before making such a pitiful noise again.

"Oh God, a little help in here! Sheppard? Where the hell is Sheppard with Beckett? They've been gone long enough. How long does it take? Damn them!"

Teyla heard McKay's panicked shouts and wished he would holler a little more quietly. She felt hands rubbing her back and hoped they would soon stop touching her. Her back hurt. Her skinned burned and tingled as if hypersensitive.

She moaned.

Vomit strung heavily from her bloodied lips.

"Hold on, Teyla, Sheppard's getting Beckett. They'll be here any moment."

Teyla heard footsteps and then she heard a voice. She had only ever wished to hear two voices in all her lifetime. She had always wanted to hear her mother sing to her one last time as her mother put her to bed. The second voice Teyla longed to hear had been her father's. She had always wished to hear his strong confident voice of reason when dealing with difficult trade agreements or trying problems with her own people. She always wished to hear her parents again and feel the safety and comfort that had been snatched from her so long ago.

Never had she ever thought that she would wish to hear a third voice. However, when the thick accent, "Dear God, what happened?" whispered steadily from a far off distance she felt her fear spark and rise in parallel with her relief.

When a gentle hand gingerly touched the side of her head and lay there for just a moment she found great comfort and felt her misery abate just a little. She strained to hear the voice again, to feel the warmth and reassuring comfort it so often granted without much effort. The voice quietly whispered, "Ahh, lass, it'll be okay. I prom-," the soothing voice faltered, paused. The rhythm interrupted and then picked back up, soft and with a sad cadence, "Ah, Teyla…I'll not let the pain stay."

Teyla's fear spiked. A rebellious tear rolled down her marred face.

She knew it wasn't going to be okay. She was not going to be all right.

Dr. Beckett's voice had hitched. He couldn't promise her she'd be fine.

Perhaps she would get to hear her mother and father a little earlier than she had planned.

[{O}]

A/N: I meant it about the chicken!


	6. 6:The Salve

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER SIX: THE SALVE**

_A/N: Your feedback has been refreshing and good. You should all give me more. I appreciate the poetry and the alliteration. It proves that people who read my stories are of a higher order of intelligence. You should join the Genii. Can any of you fight with sticks?_

_A/N: The chicken is still in the box. I have poked holes in the box and have pushed some corn in there. Peggy pecked me a couple times when I tried to hand feed her so there will be no more of that. If she thinks she's clever, she's only making me angrier and hungrier for fried chicken. Leave me reviews or the chicken is going into the Fry Daddy!_

_A/N: Something is in the ventilation system. I thought it was the lizard, but Sydney is now living in my coffee pot. I heard something slithering over my head a moment ago. It gave me the heebie jeebies! Read this story and make me happy by leaving many reviews._

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McKay paced outside the tent, rubbing his hands together feverishly, ignoring the looks he was getting from the festival-goers. Sheppard and Beckett were inside, tending to Teyla, while he and Ronon were outside, waiting to hear.

How the hell could this have happened?

If Sheppard hadn't asked him to leave the tent, so he and Ronon could talk, McKay would never have seen the fight...would never have seen Teyla defeating Ronon's sister in a blur of masterful skill...right up until the Satedan woman had cheated.

And the crowd had cheered when it happened! They had CHEERED! What sort of people cheered on the beating to death of another person?

Bile rose in his throat as the scene ran through his mind for what felt like the hundredth time...

_Still annoyed at having nearly been strangled, and painfully aware of the dark looks he was getting from the crowd now because he was a "fake," he had pushed his way through the people in a half-hearted attempt to find Teyla. Not that he wanted to find her if she was still with that Amazon woman, but being alone on a strange planet where the half the population looked ready to knock him down was not his idea of fun. _

_It was the sound of the stick fighting that had turned him in the direction of where the largest crowd had gathered. He'd come across the bright idea that she might have been attracted to the familiar noise. After all, it was her favorite sport. So, he'd wandered over...and pushed through the crowd when he recognized the golden hair of Nonor in the middle of the ring, the Satedan woman taller than most of the crowd. _

_As he reached the fence, he grinned. Teyla was whipping the snot out of the taller woman—a one-Athosian wrecking crew. The sticks in her hands flew with a speed the other woman couldn't match, hitting and smacking and biting and whipping, and it was easy to see the astonished look on Nonor's face as she was forced back towards the rope fence. Teyla looked driven, relentless, and Rodney could see why. There was blood on her face, and he recognized that she wasn't moving as fluidly as she normally did—Nonor must have done her some serious damage before Teyla decided to go to town. This wasn't a friendly fight—Teyla looked like she was fighting for her life. _

_He cheered when Nonor hit the rope fence with her back, barely deflecting half the blows rained on her...then, before he even had a chance to see how, Nonor had grabbed a large red and white flag and trapped one of Teyla's sticks...and then her head. _

_"NO!" he'd shouted, "No! That's cheating! Stop!" But his words were drowned out by the cheering around him, as the Satedan people cheered on one of their own. _

_ Nonor was already taking advantage of her treachery, beating down on Teyla as the Athosian vainly tried to escape the heavy fabric, her struggling movements growing increasingly slower. _

_"STOP!" McKay didn't even think, jumping over the fence and running for the two combatants. He heard yelling behind him, but he wasn't sure who it was for. Probably him, but he didn't care. He tapped the radio on his head, "SHEPPARD! I NEED YOU! TEYLA'S DOWN!" _

_And then he was by her side, shoving Nonor back, paying no attention to the look on the other woman's face as he worked feverishly to get the tightly wrapped red and white flag off of Teyla, to get her out of there. When Nonor tried to step in again, he raged up, shoving her back with a force that actually sent the taller woman stumbling to the ground and pointing his gun at her head. He didn't even realize he'd drawn it. _

_"You get the hell out of here! You come near her again, and I will kill you!" he yelled, still holding the weapon on her. When Nonor made no attempt to move again, he quickly put the gun away and returned to Teyla. _

_He was still unwrapping her, peeling fabric away from bleeding wounds, when he felt Sheppard at his side, helping. Then Sheppard was gone, racing back to the gate to get Beckett, and he was sitting at Teyla's side as Ronon stood over them, the warrior obviously frozen in shock. And Nonor had disappeared, lost in the crowd. _

After that, everything had become a blur - someone supplied a backboard and Teyla was carried into the shelter of the tent, that much he knew, and he tried to keep hold of her hand the whole time, even when she was unconscious, afraid to let go. Then, Beckett had arrived with Sheppard and ordered him and Ronon to leave the tent.

He stopped his pacing, wiping a hand down his sweating face, looking towards the closed tent flap, wishing he was in there...and thankful he wasn't. Teyla's face had been badly beaten, blood and bruises covering most of the side of her face and down her neck. Her arm had been at a sickly looking angle, and her torn purple top had revealed a flaming red bruise covering most of her ribs, abdomen and back, a bruise that was rapidly turning the darkest and ugliest shade of blue-black he had ever seen. And nothing he did seemed to help ease her pain.

He wasn't a fool.

He looked up when he heard desperate whispering, and turned to see Nonor talking with her brother a few yards away. Nonor wore her share of bruises, up and down her arms, along with a nice number of cuts where the skin had broken under Teyla's onslaught. Her tawny hair was gathered up on her head, around which it looked like a laurel wreath had been placed. She was talking rapidly, her eyes wide and worried, pointing every so often at the tent and at McKay and then at herself.

Ronon, for his part, simply listened, his arms crossed. His expression was shuttered, unreadable.

Finally, Nonor backed off, her bottom lip trembling a little, and McKay watched as a tear tracked down her lovely, dirty face.

How could something so beautiful be so deadly?

Ronon said something finally, and Nonor nodded, backing up and wiping at her face to get rid of the tear. She glanced once more at McKay, her expression showing a level of confusion, and then she turned and limped off, headed somewhere.

McKay's jaw set, his barely quelled anger rising once more to the surface. She had almost killed Teyla! Hell, for all they knew, she had! And, what? She was going to get away with it?

He made a move to go after her, so angry he could spit, but a heavy hand slapped against his chest, stopping him.

"Let me go," he hissed, glaring up at the Satedan.

"She said you pulled a gun on her," Ronon growled, pressing a little harder. "Said she thought you were going to kill her, but Sheppard stopped you."

"What?" McKay was flabbergasted. "I...what?"

"How could you?" Ronon spat, shoving McKay hard, sending him back a few steps.

"How...she...No! Damn it! She was trying to kill Teyla! I stopped her!"

"She wasn't trying to kill her."

"Oh, no, you're right," McKay snapped back, his acidic tongue in full force. He pointed at the tent. "Teyla's dying in there because she tripped. Did it to herself, did she?"

"It was a fair fight," Ronon growled back, stepping threateningly towards the smaller man. "Teyla knew what she was doing."

"Fair fight? Is that what that Valkyrie told you? Nonor cheated, Ronon! She—"

A hand shoved hard at the scientist's chest, sending McKay stumbling backwards again, and then Ronon was suddenly right in Rodney's face, staring down at him.

"My sister...doesn't cheat. She's a lot of things, but she doesn't cheat. She doesn't need to."

McKay drew up to his full height, almost standing on his toes as he met glare for glare, "You didn't see what I saw. Teyla was winning, but your sister—"

"No! Nonor doesn't cheat! My sister fought only to match her opponent. She told me it was the heat of battle that caused it to go as far as it did, and I believe her." He stepped even closer to McKay, chest to chest. "And so do the officials. They awarded her the winner of the contest."

"They're blind! They wanted her to win! They were cheering when she tried to beat Teyla to death!"

"Shut up!" Ronon yelled, shoving at McKay again. McKay staggered back again, then rushed forward, shoving hard at Ronon. Amazingly, it took the Satedan enough by surprise that he was forced back a step or two. McKay jabbed an accusing finger at him, his face bright red.

"I will NOT shut up! Your sister cheated! She nearly killed—"

The punch sent McKay flying, landing hard on his side, his jaw on fire where Ronon's fist had impacted.

"She's my sister!" Ronon yelled at him, fisted hand shaking. McKay just stared up at him from his position on the ground, breathing hard and touching his chin with a shaking hand. When he pulled it back, he saw blood on his fingers.

"And Teyla's my friend," McKay replied stubbornly, his voice trembling slightly as he stared up darkly at the man standing over him.

Ronon stared down at him for a moment, his expression moving from anger to confusion...and finally to sadness. Closing his eyes, the Satedan turned away, moving to stand several feet away from the scientist, his back to him.

Slowly, McKay got back to his feet, blinking dazedly a little and looking again at the blood on his hands.

The sound of the tent flap lifting turned his head in that direction, and he found Ronon by his side again, both of them barely breathing as first Sheppard, then Beckett emerged from the tent.

Sheppard didn't look at either of them. He just pushed past and walked as far as he could without being out of earshot, keeping his back to them.

McKay stared after his friend, his eyes widening. Then he turned back to Beckett, and the knot in his stomach nearly stopped his breath.

Beckett's eyes were downcast.

"There's...there's nothing I can do," the Scot said, his voice deep with misery. "Her wounds...even if I got her back to Atlantis right now, I couldn't..." he trailed off, and shook his head.

"Oh God," McKay whispered, staring past the Scot to the tent. Ronon seemed frozen to the spot next to him, completely unmoving.

"You...you might want to say your goodbyes now," Beckett added softly. "She doesn't have much time."

Rodney felt like he was choking. Couldn't breathe. This couldn't be happening. _This_ _could not be happening!_

Beckett's blue eyes lifted, meeting Rodney's shocked ones, then shifted to Ronon's misery-filled ones.

"I am so sorry," he whispered, the pain in his voice plain.

"Wait!" Nonor's voice shouted, causing them all to turn. "Wait! Ronon!"

She was pushing through the milling crowd, her golden hair flying behind her. She was holding something in her hand—it appeared to be a small jar of salve. As a group, they turned to watch her approach. McKay hated her even more as she smiled brightly at them all. How could she be happy? He growled, and he felt Ronon's hand on his shoulder. Sheppard and Beckett, meanwhile, just watched as she arrived before them, almost breathless.

"Ronon!" She held the salve out, "I won this! Winning the sticks event made me the overall champion of Yedeenorog, and this was the prize! And, they wisely declared me champion of the running event, because I was obviously bound to win that as well. I will allow you to use this for Teyla!"

Dex looked momentarily confused, staring down at the jar in her hands.

"I'm sorry, lass," Beckett said, shaking his head at her. "I'm sure we appreciate—"

"Like hell," McKay muttered, glaring viciously at the woman.

"...the gesture," Beckett finished, shooting McKay a shushing look, "but I'm afraid—"

"You don't understand," Nonor said, pressing the jar into Ronon's hands. "Ronon, it is Alicorn Salve!"

"By the Ancestors...," Ronon gaped, his eyes widening as he stared down at the tiny jar. "Really?"

"It's what?" Beckett asked.

"Alicorn Salve," Nonor said, her brow furrowing as she looked at the strange healer. "The Oil of Eternity! The Liniment of Life! The Cure-all Cream!"

Beckett just blinked at her, then looked at Ronon. "It's what?"

Ronon suddenly came alive, turning and running into the tent, leaving them all behind. Beckett blinked some more, and then dashed in after him. By unspoken accord, McKay, Sheppard and Nonor quickly followed, pushing into the small area in time to see Ronon on his knees next to Teyla, spreading what looked like a whitish salve over the almost black bruise covering Teyla's abdomen, side and back.

"What are you..." Beckett started to say, getting on Teyla's other side, then his mouth fell open. "Oh my God," he gasped, watching as, everywhere the salve soaked into the skin...the purpling bruise immediately started to fade. "What the hell...?"

Ronon was already spreading more of the salve on Teyla's neck and head, where Nonor's blows had impacted the skull.

Cuts healed, bones knitted, bruises disappeared as the blood was reabsorbed...

"This is impossible," Beckett breathed. "Impossible."

Nonor just grinned, crossing her arms across her ample breasts, shaking her hair out. "I told you. I've saved her."

McKay flinched at that, and he turned to stare openly at the brazen woman.

And his eyes widened in the realization that Nonor didn't have a mark on her. The bruises, cuts and wounds Teyla had inflicted on the Satedan woman were also all gone. How...? He turned still wide eyes back to Teyla, and saw her skin too was once more nearly flawless. Oh my God...

When Ronon backed off, with the jar half-empty, Beckett was there, leaning over Teyla, checking her over. Hands prodded and poked, then he was pressing a stethoscope to her chest. The Athosian appeared to be sleeping...peacefully. Just like Nonor, not a mark on her.

McKay's eyes narrowed slightly. He wondered if the others realized that Nonor had used the salve on herself first, before offering it to Teyla. His opinion of her just dropped another notch.

Beckett finally backed off, shaking his head in obvious wonder. Then he looked up at the group. "I need to get her home. We need to leave. Now."

Nonor's face fell a little, and she looked at Ronon. "But..."

Ronon turned to look up at his sister, and she stared back, her blue eyes softening, filling with tears.

"But," she said again, "You just...we just..."

Ronon stared at her a moment longer, then shifted to look at Sheppard, standing between her and McKay.

"Can she come?" he said, his voice questioning. Nonor's eyebrows lifted, surprised. For the first time, she realized that Ronon was not in charge here. Her head snapped to the side, to look at the man on her right with an appraising look.

Sheppard stared back at Ronon, his jaw tense. He had no idea what to think right now.

Finally, slowly, he gave a nod.

McKay gave out a loud huff, and crossed his arms, clearly not happy. Ronon purposefully ignored the scientist, giving Sheppard a thankful nod.

"Okay," Beckett said, standing up. "Let's get her out of here."

**TBC**

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A/N: Something is definitely slithering up there. I don't like it. I think I'll get Julie down the hatch and see if she can do anything about it. JULIE! Get your udders down here! Mind the ladder!

A/N: GIVE ME REVIEWS! Or the chicken gets it! I am NOT kidding. She's pecked her last Genii!


	7. 7:The Tantrum

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER SEVEN: THE TANTRUM**

A/N: Your feedback has made me happy. You have gained another day of life for Peggy the Chicken. She is clucking happily at that news. Fail me and she will be on the chopping block. Her life is in your hands - use those hands to type me a lengthy and well thought out message.

A/N: The mongoose problem is getting out of control. I don't really mind the snakes. The lizard seems rather happy in the coffee pot although he never stops running and running and running and his eyes seem a little 'buggy.' Those mongeese, though, are getting on my nerves. One of them has been trying to nest in my hair while I sleep. Another likes to nibble treats from my hands. I've trained another to stand up and to roll over. I hate them. I hate them all.

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Buzzing filled her head, like a swarm of insects hovering over wildflowers during the warm season. The annoying noise slowly receded, resolving itself into the familiar voices of her friends and teammates. One of those voices pierced through them all, sending a sharp spike of pain through her head.

"I will _not_ shut up!" Rodney McKay's distinctive voice shouted in the high-pitched tone he used when he was especially agitated. It sounded like he was - as Colonel Sheppard had explained - having a 'hissy fit.'

"I know..."

"Not here, McKay!" the colonel interrupted with a hiss. "There's sick people here who don't need to hear your little tantrum."

"Tantrum?!" Rodney's voice pitched even higher.

"Gentlemen!" Elizabeth said firmly. "Briefing room. Now."

Both men fell silent, though Teyla could hear some soft grumbling. A tiny smile curled her lips as she pictured them meekly following Dr. Weir like chastised children.

"Teyla? Are you awake, lass?"

Forcing her eyes open, Teyla blinked against the bright lights of the infirmary, then looked up into the concerned blue eyes of Dr. Beckett. Relief flooded his features and he asked with a kind smile, "How are you feeling?"

Teyla moved her arms and legs experimentally. "I am... stiff and my head hurts."

"Aye, that's to be expected." He took her vital signs and examined her carefully, shaking his head in awe. "We were afraid we'd lost you."

Wrinkling her brow in confusion, Teyla searched her memory, but could recall nothing that would explain her present condition. "What happened?"

"You don't remember?"

"No," Teyla said with a frown. "I remember going to the Yedeenorog festival, and meeting Ronon's sister, but things are not clear beyond that."

Beckett sighed. "Well, you apparently took part in the competitions, though I'm afraid you fared badly against Nonor."

"Why do I not remember?"

"You took a good bang on the head, and it's common to have some minor memory loss after something like that." Beckett smiled at her.

"And the rest?" Teyla pressed. "There were further injuries?"

"Your injuries were quite severe. There was little I could…" Beckett paused, shaking his head, and his expression clouded as if he was chastising himself for some wrongdoing, reliving some horrible event that he could do nothing to fix. Then, his face changed to something resembling wonder as he went on, "But Nonor had some salve that literally saved your life. It was remarkable really. I've never seen the like." He lifted his gaze, looking elsewhere, as if seeking out this substance - the researcher in him wanting to know more.

"I must thank her," Teyla said, shifting uncomfortably.

"Later." Beckett patted her arm gently. "You rest now."

Teyla let her eyes drift shut and slipped easily into sleep.

[{O}]

Rodney folded his arms tightly across his chest, scowl firmly in place as he glared across the table at Sheppard.

Leaning forward in her seat, Elizabeth asked, "What happened?"

Rodney opened his mouth to answer but was cut off by Sheppard. "Teyla fought in one of the competitions and things got a little rough," the colonel explained.

"Rough?" Rodney exclaimed. "Is that what you call it? Rough is cuts and bruises. That wasn't rough, it was brutal."

"McKay," Sheppard said, sounding tired already.

"Her neck was broken, Colonel," Rodney spat. "That... that Amazon was trying to kill her!"

Wearily Sheppard raised a hand and dropped it. "Nonor didn't hurt Teyla on purpose," he said, willing it to be true.

"Like hell!" Rodney's voice rose along with his anger. "She cheated to get the advantage and then kept hitting Teyla after she was down."

Sheppard closed his eyes. "The judges said she won fair and square. Everyone we questioned in the crowd said the same thing."

Rodney gave a contemptuous snort. "Of course they did. They were all cheering her on while she clubbed Teyla. It was a death sport and Nonor cheated to win."

Sheppard commented, "Nonor won all her other bouts, McKay. I don't think she'd need to cheat." He turned to Elizabeth and added, "We went back and checked with the officials for the whole show. It's no 'death sport'."

"But people get killed sometimes," McKay concluded, folding arms over his chest.

"Things get out of hand from time to time if the competitors are well matched," Sheppard admitted. "But rarely does anyone get killed. It's like any sport, I guess. I mean, kids get killed playing baseball sometimes."

"It's not the same," McKay responded. "I mean, ballplayers aren't supposed to use the bats to pound each other to a pulp."

Elizabeth managed to cut her way into the argument. "Rodney, I know you're upset about Teyla," she began. "But perhaps you didn't understand the competition."

"Understand? I know what I saw." Rodney lifted his chin stubbornly.

"What you _think_ you saw," Sheppard corrected. "You arrived late and remembered things that didn't happen," he stated, knowing that McKay wasn't lying. The man couldn't lie to save his life. Understandingly, he stated, "You get worked up when one of your friends gets hurt."

"Well," McKay's eyes softened a little. "Who wouldn't?"

Sheppard turned to Weir and stated, "He probably panicked a bit when he saw that Teyla was injured. And you know how jumpy he gets in the heat of a battle."

"Jumpy?" McKay shot back.

"I seem to remember hearing about you firing blindly on P3M-376."

"That was a … special circumstance and I hardly think…"

"It's not a criticism, Rodney," Sheppard said, with a condescending expression. "It's just that you're not …"

"… A warrior," McKay filled in.

"More or less," Sheppard responded with a shrug.

Throwing Sheppard a disgusted look, Rodney prepared to argue his point further, but Elizabeth intervened.

"Enough!" she declared. "The proof points in one direction."

Incredulously, McKay pointed to himself. "Eyewitness testimony!" he cried.

"And we got a couple dozen people saying it was all fair," Sheppard said unenthusiastically, he eyed his friend with something akin to sympathy. "They know how these competitions work. You have to remember, we're newcomers there. You just saw Teyla being hurt, McKay. Things went too far. Everyone admits that – but no one believes it was done intentionally or maliciously," he tried to explain.

McKay made a huffing sound in response.

Elizabeth closed her eyes as if in pain. This little outing was supposed to be a team-building event, but it appeared that everything had just gone from bad to worse. The team dynamic was in turmoil. "Gentlemen, look, regardless of what actually happened, we cannot assume that Nonor intended to harm Teyla, and she did, in fact, save her life. I think that counts for something."

"Wouldn't have needed saving if she hadn't..." Rodney muttered angrily.

"Rodney," Elizabeth warned. "While Nonor is here, you will accord her the same respect as any other visitor."

"She's your teammate's sister, McKay," Sheppard said. "I think we need to give her the benefit of the doubt."

Tossing a final glare at them, Rodney stomped out of the room. As he left, he heard Elizabeth ask, "What happened to his face?"

"Ronon said he tripped and fell on it," Sheppard replied.

[{O}]

Storming away, Rodney realized that he should have expected this. Any time there was an alien woman involved, Sheppard's common sense went out the window and everyone stopped listening to Rodney. It was like the Chaya situation all over again. Somehow, he was always painted as the bad guy.

Outside the infirmary, Rodney paused to take a few deep breaths, forcing his anger down. Teyla didn't need to be dealing with his problems. Despite what most people thought about him, he could be nice when he wanted.

He just had to 'want to' - that's all.

Once he was calm, Rodney stepped inside the infirmary, relieved when he saw no sign of Ronon or his sister. "Carson?"

The doctor poked his head around the curtain surrounding Teyla's bed.

"How is she?" Rodney asked quietly.

"She's a bit sore, and she doesn't remember much, but I think she'll be fine." Beckett shook his head in wonder. "Bloody miracle. If it wasn't for that salve..." He left the rest unsaid, his face drawn up in a puzzled expression – still unable to fathom what had happened.

"Do you know what's in it?" Rodney asked.

"Not yet," Beckett replied. "I sent a sample off to the chemists, but it'll take them some time to properly analyze it."

"Can I..." Rodney gestured toward the curtains.

"Aye, but just for a minute," Beckett answered. "She needs her rest."

Rodney stepped behind the curtain and stared down at his sleeping teammate. She looked as beautiful as always—there was no sign of any of the injuries she sustained in the fight. If he hadn't seen it with his own eyes, Rodney wouldn't have believed it ever happened. He shuddered at the memory of Teyla's broken, bloodied body lying in the mud, her neck at the wrong angle and bruises marring her smooth skin. Rodney swallowed hard and turned away.

"Wait a minute, Rodney," Beckett called as he made to leave the infirmary. "I want to look at your neck and that eye."

"What? My eye?"

"Yes," Beckett explained. "You've got quite the shiner going, there. And I'm not even going to ask about how you got that stripe around your neck..."

"Oh, right," Rodney said, hand lifting to touch at his sore face. In all his worry over Teyla, he'd almost forgotten Ronon's punch.

"How'd you do this, then?" Beckett asked as he prodded Rodney's cheek, and then gently probed his neck.

Recalling the explanation Sheppard had given Elizabeth – and the fury that had led Ronon to hit him in the first place – Rodney decided it would be better for his health to keep the truth to himself.

"I, um, I was just clumsy. Tripped."

Beckett eyed him dubiously.

Rodney sighed. "I was in a hurry to get to Teyla and I didn't watch where I was going. Ronon had leant me his necklace and it got caught, nearly choked me."

"You nearly strangled yourself when you tripped?"

"Yeah." McKay tugged his head away. "It's fine." Beckett eyed him a moment, then shrugged.

"You should be more careful, Rodney," Beckett said with a soft chuckle. "And probably shouldn't wear other people's jewelry. Obviously doesn't work for you."

"Yeah, yeah, mock my pain," Rodney grouched.

"Doesn't look like anything's broken, but you'll have a couple of nice bruises for a few days." He handed Rodney a packet of ibuprofen.

"Nothing nice about it," Rodney grumbled as he started for the door.

"Put some ice on your face," Beckett called as he left.

In response, Rodney just grunted, and after casting another look in Teyla's direction, he pressed open the door left the infirmary, with Becket watching him with a curious expression.

Rodney made his way down the corridors, away from the infirmary, his feet clomping ungracefully as he made his way toward his room – just wanting to get away from everyone and everything. He was tired and he was sore and desperate for sleep.

Why did everything have to go to hell all the time? Why didn't people believe him? What was wrong with them? What was wrong with him?

Suddenly, something stepped out of one of the side hallways, moving directly in front of him, blocking his way. Startled, found himself, once again, inches from Nonor's enormous breasts.

He back-stepped, trying to get clear of her, but she pursued until he was pressed with his back against the wall. She stood so close he could feel her breath, her eyes wide and intense as she stared at him. Normally, having a beautiful woman's leather-clad bosom in such close proximity was something he enjoyed, but in this case, it was hampering his ability to breathe.

"You got any sense of personal space?" he asked her incredulously.

"Personal space?" she repeated, looking confused and then irritated about her confusion.

"What do you want?" he gasped, wanting to side-step her and get out of the tight spot, but he surmised she'd counter any move he tried to make.

Nonor frowned delicately. "I don't understand why you won't stop lying about me," she stated petulantly, pushing out her bottom lip. "It was a fair fight, and the greater warrior won."

"I'm not lying," Rodney argued. "And you know it."

"I won."

"You cheated!"

"I would not cheat."

"You did."

"I fought a good fight."

"You nearly killed her!"

"She didn't die. I saved her."

McKay shook his head. "Oh my God, you really believe that don't you? I always had a thing for blondes but now you're seriously making me rethink my whole outlook on life. Because, I don't think you have an ounce of sense in that giant head of yours. I really don't think you have the capability of understanding me or comprehending anything I've had to say."

Her pretty little mouth was pressed into a deeper frown as she tried to work her way through McKay's discourse. Finally, she came to a conclusion. "You are rude, aren't you," she stated determinedly.

With a sigh, Rodney, grumbled, "Yeah, let me tell you, sister, you're not the first one to tell me that."

Her eyes narrowed at his statement, and she shoved a hand against him, forcing him against the wall as she snapped, "Do not call me 'sister'! Never would we allow such a man into the noble family of Dex!" She sneered. "You dare to compare yourself to my brother?"

McKay held up his hands. "Hold on! Hold on! I'm not sayin' that. Jesus! Calm down, Brunhilde!"

"You steal the honor and glory of others! You are no warrior! And my name is not Brunhilde! It is NONOR!"

"Look, I don't need anyone else's glory," Rodney snapped, lifting up on his toes to look her more in the eye. "The technology I've created, the ideas I have set into motion, have killed hundreds – if not thousands - of Wraith and destroyed entire hive ships!"

"So," she said, cocking her head. "You allow others to fight while you stand behind and do figuring?" Dismissively, she flipped a hand as she stepped back. "A weakling such as you is not worth my notice." And she turned, finally giving McKay some breathing room, and started to walk away.

He glared at her defiantly. "Just because I use my brain instead of my fists..."

Nonor turned her head, flipping her mane of tawny hair, eyes flashing in contempt. "Pathetic creatures like you are beneath the contempt of true warriors – if I were you, I would return to the burrow from which you emerged and stay there." And she stalked away, her beautiful body seeming to shine under the lights of the Ancient hallway.

Rodney said nothing, knowing that it wouldn't make a difference. He probably shouldn't be surprised by her reaction to him. A society that placed so much value upon physical strength and fighting ability was not likely to appreciate someone like him. Nonor had certainly made her opinion clear.

Rodney winced and rubbed his aching jaw. "I'm a warrior...just with this instead." He tapped at his forehead as he spoke, turning to walk in the opposite direction from her.

Ignoring the strange looks he got from a couple of soldiers he passed, he continued to mutter away. "I'm a... a mind warrior. That's it. Brains instead of brawn." Rodney smiled at that. Mind warrior. He thought it was an apt description. Maybe he could get a t-shirt made.

He kept walking, moving his way through the corridors of Atlantis. When he reached his quarters, Rodney pressed open the door, and stood a moment in the dim room, feeling tired beyond words, yet knowing he'd be unable to sleep.

He fell heavily onto his bed, thinking about Teyla – bloody, beaten, and ready to slip into death. He considered the crazy Amazon woman and he wondered if she even realized that she was lying. The more he thought about her, the more he realized that perhaps she believed every word she said – which made her even more dangerous than if she'd simply been a liar.

And he contemplated the reactions of his teammates toward the aggravating woman. They all seemed smitten - completely taken in by her beauty and prowess and promises. I mean, what the hell was she doing, wandering the halls alone? People like her needed an armed guard - maybe even a leash! But no, they wouldn't listen to him - they didn't seem to hear a thing he'd said.

He sighed, wondering what he should do. No answers came to him as he stared up at the ceiling, contemplating the intricate and familiar designs imprinted there.

**TBC**

[{O}]

A/N: Damn mongoose is curled up in my lap now. It fills me with loathing.

A/N: See... down there. Just below this message. See that "Submit Review" thing? You see it now? Good. You know what to do.


	8. 8:The Dilemma

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER EIGHT: THE DILEMMA**

A/N: Your feedback amuses me and has bought Peggy the chicken another day. I am running out of corn bits for the chicken so her time may be running out in any case. Plus Julie is getting a bit miffed at me for spending so much time with the chicken. And then she's upset about the 'waste' of corn.

A/N: The infestation problem persists. The mongeese have dispatched some of the king cobras, but the remaining snakes have beat a retreat further into the ventilation system. The mongeese are getting cocky and are lording about the place. Julie stepped on one. She seemed happy with herself about that. Meanwhile, a new sound can be heard - it's a strange scrabbling sound in the vents. I fear it may be lobsters.

[{O}]

Ronon glanced about the gateroom for any sign of Nonor. He wasn't sure where she had wandered off to, but he was fairly certain that his sister, roaming the halls of the ancient city un-chaperoned, was a bad idea.

Still, a mix of overwhelming emotion filled him. His sister was here, on Atlantis - alive! Never, since the moment he had discovered that some of his people had actually survived the Wraith attack on his world, had he dared to dream that any of his family might still live. Seeing Nonor at the Yedeenorog was a shock, a thrill and…a burden. His sister lived. Strong and independent, a mighty warrior and now...his responsibility.

Above him, in the glass-enclosed room that served as Doctor Weir's office, he could see Colonel Sheppard and Weir conferring. He wondered if they were discussing Teyla's condition, Nonor's arrival, McKay's accusations or maybe even a certain male Satedan. What was to become of his place here now that they had found Nonor? For seven years he'd been on his own, careful to connect to no one. He'd survived and now, when he finally had found a place, a place where he almost felt like he belonged...he might be forced to leave.

Slowly, these people had begun to feel almost like 'family'. He had found a real connection with Teyla and Sheppard, and was growing oddly fond of McKay as well, who was always showing himself to be far more than he appeared. Sheppard had once flippantly described McKay as being like his "annoying little brother," and Ronon realized that he'd begun to think of the two of them that way as well - like two older brothers whom he both looked up to and enjoyed making fun of at the same time. A smile creased his features as he thought of the way those two sniped at each other, and how he was slowly beginning to join in, enjoying every second of  
it.

And then there was Teyla...

Damn it! All of this had just started to feel comfortable, to feel like a home. He had started to feel happy, something he had not know for so long, maybe not even since his parents had died. But now that he had part of his real family back, did that change everything?

His eyes narrowed as he watched Sheppard and Weir talk. There was too much noise in the room for even his sensitive ears to hear what they were saying,but he could read their faces. He could see the worry etched across Weir's brow and the way the skin wrinkled just above her nose. He took in the hard set of Sheppard's jaw and the tightnessacross the man's shoulders - stiff, tense, angry.

Ronon turned away, hating the visible tension. The team had gone to Yedeenorog with him to help him reconnect with his people, to relax and unwind. Instead, they had returned through the gate with nothing but…

"Brother!" Nonor's melodic voice bellowed through the gateroom as she entered,surrounded by admirers. Somewhere amongst her explorations,the Satedan woman had attracted Major Lorne for an escort. There were others, too. Two marines Ronon didn't recognize, a scientist from McKay's lab and—was that Dr. Kavanagh? Ronon shook his head, amazed yet unsurprised by his sister's ability to draw people to her. She towered above the group of men, but leaned attentively to hear whatever it was Lorne was pointing out to her. Ronon didn't miss the fact that Nonor's hand clasped Lorne's arm possessively even as she managed to press herself against him.

She seemed more interested in the marines, Ronon noticed. Kavanagh and the other scientist looked a little lost in the group, trying to get closer to the majesty that was Nonor Dex. The golden haired warrior ignored their attempts as she slipped one arm around Lorne's waist and drew him closer.

"Sister." Ronon failed to keep his displeasure from his tone but Nonor was oblivious.

Lorne, however, was not. The major met Ronon's gaze somewhat sheepishly as he tried to pull away from the gorgeous woman, but she wasn't having any of it. Nonor tightened her grip on Lorne's waist. The others, seeing Ronon's expression, scattered quickly – none quicker than Kavanagh, who at least had the courage to pause once he'd put a control panel between himself and the siblings.

Once safely fortified, the scientist put on a haughty look, pressing his weight against the panel. His mouth might have sneered, but his eyes still betrayed a longing for the beauty. He tottered from one foot to another, as if in some sort of discomfort beyond just his generally toady fear.

Ronon ignored them. "Where have you been, sister?"

"Exploring." Nonor excitedly pulled Lorne closer, eliciting a soft grunt from the uncomfortable looking major. "It is invigorating to find myself walking the very hallways that the ancestors themselves once…"

"You should not go off alone," Ronon interrupted, chiding gruffly.

"I was not alone for long," she replied quickly. "I went seeking this great city's protectors - and I found them." She rubbed a hand across Lorne's chest, causing the major to blush furiously. "They were practicing their skills in the gym, and agreed to allow me to participate." Her smile grew, as she added, "We had a marvelous match in hand-to-hand combat."

Ronon regarded Lorne, noting that he seemed to be moving without difficulty – there was no sign that Nonor had caused unnecessary injuries to him in the sparring. He felt a degree of relief a realization.

Continuing, Nonor stated, "And now, I am promised to learn how to use their weapons." The hand she had pressed against Lorne's chest drifted down to her own waist, and to the nylon belt that now sat low at her hips...and to the butt of the gun holstered there.

Ronon's eyebrows raised in surprise as his eyes met Nonor's. "Where did you get that?" he asked, recognizing the Atlantis standard issue weapon.

Lorne cleared his throat as he tried to explain, "Well, us...she was interested in how it functioned. We were going to the shooting range so she could try it." When he saw Ronon's disbelieving expression, the major added hastily, "She would be properly supervised and it's not loaded."

Nonor smiled, looking joyful and excited. "But it will be," she exclaimed. "Major Lorne…" she drew out the surname lovingly, as if it was the most precious of pet-names, "…will show me how it is used." She smiled sweetly, affectionately at Lorne, and stated, "Of course it doesn't have the power that I am used to, but Major Lorne assures me that what his weapon lacks in power, it more than makes up for with endurance and accuracy."

Ronon's eyes narrowed, zeroing in dangerously on the major.

Lorne cleared his throat. "She, uh, means the target practice," he muttered, blushing again.

"I'm aware," he replied. "But I still think it's a bad idea." He looked again at his sister, "You are not here to fight, sister. I think we've had enough of that, don't you?"

Nonor frowned. "I did not hurt anyone," she emphasized petulantly, lowering her gaze a moment,but not before Ronon caught the flash of defiance there. 'Anyone.' He heard the insinuation in her tone. She was still angry at him for questioning her about what had happened to Teyla.

"Ronon? Nonor?" Sheppard called from above. "Elizabeth is ready for a briefing."

The brilliant smile flashed at Nonor's face as she glanced up at John and licked her lips. Without pause she pressed Lorne away and hurried up the steps. Lorne looked like he wanted to follow, but managed to control the urge. He paused, watching her easily stride up the stairway, and finally turned and headed toward the doors.

Ronon waited a moment, his thoughts not so easily shifting away from Teyla. Nonor had insisted that what happened back at the Yedeenorog was an accident, but McKay had been equally insistent that it wasn't. The witnesses agreed with his sister's description of what had happened.

His anger still churned toward McKay. How could Rodney have pointed a weapon at his sister? And yet…Ronon's chest tightened. Had he ever known McKay to use a weapon under less-than-dire circumstances? Well, not unless he was panicked, anyway. Had McKay merely panicked when he realized Teyla was injured?

Maybe that explained it all. McKay had misinterpreted what he'd seen and… panicked.

Ronon huffed in frustration. The questions made his head ache. He pushed away the confusion and conflict and ignored the doubt that plagued him. McKay did not understand. The physicist didn't know what it was like to get caught up in the heat of a battle, even a friendly competition. The man was just a scientist who didn't trust what he didn't know.

Nonor had not meant to injure Teyla. They'd been too evenly matched, too good. The battle had just gone too far. They'd been wrapped up in winning and nobody truly intended to hurt anyone.

McKay was not a warrior and he did not know Nonor.

Right?

[{O}]

"How is this possible?" Weir looked from Sheppard to Ronon then to Nonor. "You're telling me that this…" she waved a hand around, "…Alicorn Salve, healed all of Teyla's wounds?"

"All of 'em." John nodded. "I know what you're thinking. I wouldn't have believed it either if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes," he admitted.

"How?" Elizabeth said, looking to Ronon.

The large warrior met her gaze and shrugged. "Don't know - exactly. There are legends, but they are often vague and…."

Beside him, his sister interrupted excitedly, "Alicorn Salve is a rare treasure on our world. What small amounts remain are valued higher than anything else in our society." She straightened proudly, thrusting her ample bosom in John's general direction. "It is only awarded to the mightiest warriors. It is a great honor to be awarded the salve, and an equally great honor for Teyla to have received treatment with it."

Elizabeth nodded patiently. "Where does the salve come from?"

Nonor smiled, flashing brilliant white teeth. "Our lore tell us it comes from the 'Alicorn of Ctesias'."

"The stories are more like legends," Ronon reminded. "They're not supposed to get written down so they've become mixed-up with other stories and don't make much sense. Few can clearly remember the true stories."

Nonor glanced contemptuously at her brother. "I know the true stories. I know them well."

"How?" he challenged.

"I learned them!"

"When?"

Elizabeth shared an amused look with John and softly cleared her throat, bringing the siblings attention back to her. "Please, Nonor. If you know the legend,we would be very interested in hearing it." She raised her hand to forestall any protest from Ronon. "Presuming, of course, that after Doctor McKay and Doctor Beckett join us with the chemical analysis of the salve, we will go over the information again to glean fact from fiction." That seemed to please both of the Satedans.

Nonor adjusted in her seat again, her posture emphasizing her assets. "Generations ago, explorers from Sateda discovered the magnificent 'Alicorn of Ctesias'." Her voice dropped to a loud whisper as she gestured grandly with both hands. "It was a creature of great beauty and purity and every being that came across the wise and gentle creature would become breathless, filled with emotions, trembling just to look upon it."

Ronon closed his eyes, Sheppard raised an eyebrow and Weir carefully controlled her expression as she tried to hold back her laughter and focus on Nonor's dramatic story.

**TBC**

[{O}]

A/N: I have a craving for butter sauce.

A/N: If you submit a review for this chapter, you will feel like a better person. If you do not submit a review, you will feel dirty because you have stolen from me. For your own peace of mind, submit a review.


	9. 9:The Story

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER NINE: THE STORY**

A/N: I am not getting any sleep. All night long I hear the cackling of the chicken, the scrabbling of mongeese, the slither of the king cobras and the clickity-clack of lobsters in the ventilation system. They are making me a bit nutty, I think. To combat the insomnia, I spent all night cleaning my weapons and baking pies. Fed Julie before the sun came up - she was particularly pleased with the chocolate cream and the sweet potato pies. I filled her trough with fresh spring water. After that, I threw some feed at the other animals and turned a hose on them. Once that was done, I started on this lovely chapter. I hope you enjoy.

A/N: I finally got back to bed and the rooster started crowing! The bastard woke me up an hour earlier than usual.

A/N: Julie, if you're reading this, I'll be baking pecan pies tonight! I just hope I can keep those damn mongeeses out of it!

[{O}]

"Ctesias!" Nonor repeated the name, her eyes aglow. "Long, long ago, before the Wraith darkened our skies, the Ancestors walked among us and taught the people wondrous things."

Despite himself, Dex found himself relaxing, letting the familiar words of the fable wash over him.

"But the universe is wide, and there are wonders therein even older than the Ancients," Nonor continued. "One such is Ctesias – the planet of light - the planet of healing. Ctesias - where the gentle alicorn dwells on the slopes of cloud-shouldered mountains, waiting for a warrior of pure spirit and noble heart to prove to prove worthy-"

"Worthy?" Weir broke in.

Nonor scowled at the interruption.

"What kind of creature?" Sheppard asked, tilting his head at her.

Nonor seemed less bothered by his interruption, and he eyes darted about the room. She focused on a small bronze statue on one of Elizabeth's mantles and pointed.

"Like that there, though larger and healthier and truer of spirit."

They turned to look, and Weir frowned. It was a bronze of Don Quixoite on Rocinante. "A horse?"

"How can you not know what an alicorn is?" Nonor said in reply, disdain dripping off her tongue at Elizabeth's clear inferiority.

Unfazed, Weir made a little hurry-up gesture. "Does this creature have something to do with the salve?"

Dex rolled his eyes. He'd heard the story at least as many times as his sister. "The legend says the creature's horn has miraculous healing powers," he said, placing heavy emphasis on the word 'legend.'

"Horn," Sheppard repeated. "Singular? One horn?"

"Yes," Nonor nodded excitedly, "Here!" And she tapped her forehead.

Weir scrubbed wearily at her own forehead. Sheppard's expression, on the other hand, was alight with manic glee. He only wished Rodney was here to hear this.

"A unicorn?" he cackled. "You're saying there are unicorns in the Pegasus galaxy?"

"Alicorn!" Nonor growled. Only Nonor Dex could growl and look cute doing it.

Weir crossed her arms and tried very hard not to think about the collection of ceramic unicorns that had cluttered her bedroom when she was eleven. "Could you describe these...alicorns for us?"

"Their pelts are soft as feather-down and pure as the sunlight. Their hoofs are cloven and a single horn rises from the middle of their foreheads, straight and sharp as a sword blade."

"And it's the horn that's used to make the healing salve?" Weir asked.

Nonor nodded eagerly. "If a warrior of noble worth makes the journey to Ctesias, the alicorn will prostrate itself before him, or her, and make a willing sacrifice of itself." Her eyes welled at the thought, and she brushed away the tears with a lovely gesture. "So the legends tell us. The proof, you have seen for yourself."

"And how do the warriors make this journey?" Sheppard asked.

Nonor turned a brilliant smile on him. "The proper sequence on the Great Ring has been passed down from generation to generation through our lorekeepers. Haigha, the only lorekeeper to survive the ruin of Sateda, has been teaching me the legends. I know the way."

Dex snorted. "No one has been to Ctesias in a thousand years - if it even exists."

"It exists!" Nonor asserted.

"In nighttime tales to lull babies to sleep, maybe."

Nonor stomped her foot. "The lorekeepers do not lie! Haigha has seen the lost world himself! And so have the select few he has chosen to keep the lore of our people for the next generation!"

"Now, I don't think we-" Weir tried to intervene. She was ignored.

"You?" Ronon scoffed. "You expect us to believe you've seen an alicorn?"

Nonor advanced on him, her hands balling into fists. She looked magnificent in her fury. Sheppard prudently moved out of the way. There was no way he wanted to be caught between the two of them.

A chirp from the intercom interrupted before the Dex siblings could come to blows.

"Doctor Weir?" Beckett's cheerful hail cut the tension in the room. "If all of you would care to join me, we're ready to put this miracle salve to the test."

[{O}]

"Just in time!" Carson's voice greeted them as they entered the infirmary. Carson himself was nowhere in sight, completely obscured by a massive array of diagnostic equipment. It looked like Beckett and McKay had stripped half the labs in Atlantis to monitor this experiment.

Gingerly, they picked their way through the tangled web of cables and power cords on the floor, searching for the source of the voice.

Agitated medical and science staff scuttled around them, adjusting the equipment and arguing with each other. Sheppard narrowly avoided a head-on collision with Zelenka as the Czech barreled by, swathed in surgical scrubs and nose buried in a stack of readouts.

"Carson?" Elizabeth called, raising her voice above the babble.

"Here!" Beckett's voice was closer now. "Now, Rodney, would you just...Hey! I mean it! Quit squirming!"

"I'm not squirming! I'm leaving! Find yourself another guinea pig, Doctor Strangelove!"

They rounded a final bank of beeping, blinking equipment to find Beckett grinning down at Rodney, who sulked on a diagnostic bed as nurses attached a bristling web of electrodes to his head, chest and torso.

"Stay," Beckett admonished his patient, slapping an adhesive-tipped wire on McKay's temple, just above the mottled edge of the bruise that had purpled the left side of his face from jaw to eye. "Zelenka? Do you have the...Ah yes, there it is, thank you."

Zelenka, having added mask and gloves to his ensemble, handed the nearly-empty container of healing salve to Beckett as if it was a basket of live cobras. Beckett unscrewed the cap and inserted a metal probe to extract a tiny dollop of thick, odorless goo. Nonor straightened, seeing the nearly empty jar for the first time, her eyes narrowing angrily. It had only been half-gone when she had graciously handed it to this Doctor Beckett to perform his 'tests.'

"This is ridiculous," McKay said, scooting mutinously away - or as far as the electrodes would allow. "We already know the stuff works."

"Aye. But we don't know why it works. Or how it works."

Beckett turned to include his audience in the discussion. "This substance is like nothing we've ever seen. We ran it through every test we had. Chemical and radiological tests, spectroscopic analysis - we can't find anything that would explain its apparent ability to heal tissue, mend broken bones and re-grow nerves."

"You want to watch it in action," Weir guessed. "In a controlled laboratory setting."

"Exactly. So chin up, Rodney," Beckett instructed, poised to smear the salve on the bruises on McKay's face and neck.

A hand shot out and caught the doctor's wrist, arresting the motion. Beckett let out a yelp as the bones in his wrist ground together.

"Are you mad?" Nonor cried, wrenching the instrument out of his nerveless fingers. "You would waste the most precious substance in the universe on a..." Her gaze raked across McKay with undisguised contempt. "...bruise?"

Sheppard stepped forward, casually inserting himself between the furious Satedan and McKay. He reached up and caught her hand, encouraging her to loosen her death grip on Beckett's wrist. "Easy now," he said. "The doc here knows what he's doing."

Carson gasped with relief as Nonor released his arm.

She locked eyes with Sheppard a moment longer, then reluctantly returned the sample to Beckett. "Wars have been fought," she hissed. "Legendary warriors lost their lives in search of that which you hold in your hand."

"Nonor," Dex growled a warning. He'd had more than enough of his sister's theatrics for one day.

"You're one to talk," McKay spoke up, trying to look superior as he crossed his arms over his chest, but the attempt was hampered by the wires and instruments that clung to various parts of his body and he had to settle for resting his arms in his lap. "I seem to remember you had several bruises yourself yesterday," he said, jutting out a chin in Nonor's direction. "Miraculously, they seemed to have healed."

The woman's eyes widened and she seemed to grow even taller in the tight space. "I am a warrior and a Dex!" she insisted. "The injuries I incurred in battle could hardly be compared with the silly 'bruise' obtained by a weak man tripping over his own feet."

Elizabeth held up a hand, cutting off the debate. "Carson? A word?"

She and Beckett moved a few steps off, heads together. Zelenka tossed an encouraging smile at McKay and hurried to join them.

"She has a point. A black eye isn't exactly a life-threatening injury," Weir murmured, keeping her voice low.

She watched as Sheppard hopped up to sit on the edge of the bed beside Rodney. The scientist was poking unhappily at one of the electrodes attached to his arm. The dark circles under his eyes and the garish bruise added to his air of general misery.

Carson was still trying to massage sensation back into his fingers. "You happened to catch us on a slow day, Elizabeth," he snapped. "We're fresh out of trauma cases. The lass seems to have tended to her own injuries. It's Rodney's contusion or Kavanagh's hemorrhoids. Which would you prefer?"

Weir and Zelenka shuddered. Taking that as a sign that he'd won the argument, Beckett turned back to his patient.

"Now." He said, brandishing the salve. "Where were we?"

[{O}]

Stars swirled lazily on the display screen as the image tilted just enough to give viewers a glimpse of the distant, glowing curve of a planet's ionosphere - Ctesias, if Nonor's directions were right. The MALP's freefall through the vacuum of space continued, offering the viewers back in Atlantis flashes of stars, a white blur that might be a moon and the stargate, event horizon still activated and twinkling as the MALP tumbled farther and farther away.

Sheppard pulled a face. Spacegate. They lost more MALPs that way.

"Oh would you look at that," McKay groused, punching keys in a futile attempt to direct the probe's sensors toward the planet.

The skin on his cheek and neck was smooth and unmarred. The circles under his eyes had vanished, as had the headache he'd been nursing since they returned from the planet. The experiment, as far as he was concerned, had been a rousing success - even if it hadn't answered any of Beckett's questions. The diagnostic equipment had dutifully recorded the effects of the salve - ruptured capillaries repairing themselves, torn and bruised flesh knitting itself whole again, the bruises fading away as if they had never been. But again, there was no clue how the mysterious balm had worked the cure.

McKay caught himself prodding his own cheekbone again, and pulled his attention back to the job at hand. If they couldn't synthesize the salve, their best hope was to visit Ctesias and obtain this mythical 'horn' themselves.

Rodney scowled at the scanty readings coming back from the doomed MALP, then at the woman who had provided the gate address. "You couldn't have warned us this was a spacegate? That's a couple of million dollars worth of precision equipment we just spaced, thanks to you!"

"McKay," Dex growled, curling his fingers around the back of the scientist's chair and tightening his grip until the furniture creaked in protest.

McKay swallowed hard, but subsided, still frowning ferociously at the data.

But Elizabeth was already moving in, eyes narrowing as she studied Nonor. "I'd say this explains why no one has harvested this healing salve in generations," she said slowly.

Dex had turned his glare from McKay to his sister. "Spacecraft are one of the hardest bits of technology to protect from the Wraith. It's been centuries since we have known any people who could travel the stars as you do."

Nonor shrank back, turning to Sheppard in appeal, one long-fingered hand reaching up to clutch the sleeve of his jacket.

Sheppard sidestepped her. "So, when you said you'd been to Ctesias..."

Nonor squirmed. "Well, Haigha always described it so vividly," she said, spreading her hands and giving a helpless little-girl shrug. "I felt like I really was there."

McKay erupted out of his chair and rounded on the Satedan woman with an air of undisguised triumph. "And when _he_ said he'd been to the mystical land of waterfalls and rainbows? Hmm?"

Nonor stiffened, looking regal and incredibly proud. "This lore has been passed down from generation to generation for eons," she stated, rising until she towered over McKay. "These tales are our history, the very essence of our culture, and to be entrusted with the keeping of them is an honor your crabbed and cringing mind could not possibly begin to grasp." She snarled, giving him a contemptuous glance before turning away.

McKay scowled and held his ground - chin still tilted at a defiant angle that made her fists itch to punch it.

"And when were you planning to tell us that this was just a fairy tale?" he asked. His eyes flickered toward his teammates, hoping to see someone ready to jump in and back him up on this one. Weir was watching Nonor through narrowed eyes. Sheppard was still glumly following the MALP's death spiral through deep space. Dex was just...looming.

"Enough, Rodney," Sheppard said, straightening and squaring his shoulders. "I think the salve itself tells us it's not completely...Grimm."

"Agreed," Elizabeth said, sighing a little. "Though the pun was pretty poor, Colonel. Still," she looked again at the screen, "you have go."

"Okay," Sheppard said, taking charge. "McKay, go grab Beckett and a xenobiologist, get them geared up and in the jumper bay in half an hour. Ronon," he looked at the Satedan, "you and your sister too, and see if Teyla's up. I'll meet you up there." He turned and started walking away.

"Wait, where are you going?" McKay asked, watching him leave.

"I'm going to find some specialists of my own - one man in particular." He smiled, "Because we're going on a unicorn hunt."

**TBC**

[{O}]

A/N: Unicorns! Ha ha ha ha ha!

A/N: LOOK! One of the cobra is attacking a mongoose! Excellent! They're fighting! HA! He's trying to squeeze her! He's wrapped all around her! She's twisting and turning! They're flopping around, banging into things. They're really getting into this. Funny, she doesn't seem to be trying to get away... Wait a minute, cobras aren't constrictors. Oh... and they're not fighting... ah. let me dim the light for them.

A/N: LEAVE MORE REVIEWS! The chicken had to witness this abomination! Don't let her bird brain be sullied again.


	10. 10:The Planet

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER TEN: THE PLANET**

A/N: It's getting worse. They're everywhere! Lobsters...mongoosers... cobras! They're clicking and clattering and chattering and clucking from every corner of the bunker! Driving me insane! If this keeps up, one of two things will happen. Either I will stop writing, or the story may get a little odd. Do your best to encourage me!

A/N: I'm getting a yen for chicken ala king. Julie is mooing for some chicken pot pie. The lobsters clicked in Morris code their preference for Chicken Nuggets. The mongooses and the cobras are goin' at it again, so they don't seem to care. You have done an excellent job with the feedback - so continue and Peggy will remain with the living.

[{O}]

"If this place has a beachline with even just _three_ foot rollers – I am so retiring here." Sheppard's eyes never stopped scanning the landscape of Ctesias as they flew down in the puddle jumper, looking for a spot to land. They had been flying for a while, looking for Nonor's elusive alicorn, without success.

Before them, tall, snow capped mountains covered with lush, multi-colored foliage, stood against a pale blue sky, and Sheppard banked to keep them on his right. As they turned, his eyes were automatically attracted to the bright blue ocean now glittering to his far left, looking longingly at the white waves washing along the perfectly white shoreline. Between the two, flowing trees and bushes covered the landscape, exploding with colors of Willy-Wonkian magnitude.

Returning his gaze forward, he dipped the puddle jumper lower, aiming for what looked like a large, round lake ringed by black sand, where the foliage was its thickest, assuming the same would be true of this planet's fauna. To the right of the lake, jagged red cliffs rose like a wall, sparkled with geological flecks of blue and silver. To its left, orange moss filled what could only be wetlands, striped with lines of blue, led out to the ocean. Low-lying hills covered by a dense forest rippled the rest of the surface around the lake, while straight ahead in the distance, volcanoes smoked up the air with gentle puffs of smoke.

Sheppard flew low when they reached the massive lake, skimming across the shimmering blue and causing white waves to form. He angled the jumper up again as they came to a wall of black on one side—a steep slope of black sand leading up to a plateau of sorts. The HUD displayed the topography, mapping it for him as they flew. Coming up over the edge, he lifted them over some trees, headed towards a clearing he had spotted earlier. It was as good a place as any to start.

The crammed jumper - containing not only his team, but five others - was beginning to feel a little tight.

"It's stunning." Dr. Robyn Kat Bedevere had been off-world exactly twice since she'd left working as Professor for the Understanding of Science at Oxford University and accepted a position on Atlantis eight months ago. This was the petite, perky scientist's second trip. She never imagined her doctorate in evolutionary biology and a passion for xenobiology would land her in the kind of place she'd only dreamt of as a young girl. "Stunning," she repeated.

"Of course it is," Nonor replied, crossing her arms and tossing her hair back. "I told you so." Over by his station, typing on his laptop, McKay rolled his eyes.

They landed in a wide, almost perfectly circular clearing inside the forest not far from the lake, Sheppard expertly placing the jumper almost directly in the middle of the open space.

"Everybody out," he called cheerfully, standing up from the pilot's chair. Already in the back, Teyla and the others finished suiting up and the Athosian hit the hatch control. Nonor jumped out, opening her arms wide and taking a deep breath. Behind her, Ronon and Teyla stepped more cautiously, but even their eyes were wide with wonder. Doctor Bedevere followed, smiling broadly, her eyes cataloguing the flora around her almost greedily.

To her right, Corporal Lou Jerkin stepped off the ramp and scuffed the tip of one boot into the pockmarked, rocky patch of turquoise ground that Sheppard chose as a landing pad. He nudged up the brim of his cap over his red hair with one finger and glanced again at the scenery. "Ho-ly cats. It's like Hawaii…on acid."

The man's Texas drawl made Sheppard think of a NASA engineer…or a college football commentator. Yet, there was a good amount of truth in the brief description.

"I've never been to Hawaii, Red," stated Carson simply stepping forward and looking up at the pale sky, "but if it really is anything like this…"

A gruff voice interrupted him as Sergeant Charles Boris responded, "It's better than this, Doc. Hawaii has lots of hot chicks in thongs." The burly sergeant walked across to one corner of the clearing, peering into the trees.

Nonor stood beside her brother and while she couldn't subdue the awe in her voice, she responded with a clearly confident tone. "Is it not as I said? As beautiful as any place could ever be."

On the other side of Sheppard, McKay groaned, muttering in a soft voice only the colonel could hear, "And we certainly know what a pillar of truth and sincerity you are." He focused his attention once more on the device in his hand and missed the sharp look the colonel cast at him.

Just as well, thought Sheppard. I've used it enough already today. He's gonna build up an immunity. It wasn't worth thinking about really, especially when faced with the splendor of this planet.

"You're not gonna believe this," the colonel commented, "but when I was a kid, my uncle had this exact landscape painted on the side of his van."

McKay spoke up, "This doesn't look good."

"I never thought it was a very good painting either," replied Sheppard, "but judging from the traffic into and out of that van - the ladies sure seemed to be impressed."

McKay threw back a humorless expression and raised the device he held. "No, I mean _this_. Either the meter has taken one worm hole trip too many or there is _constant_ low-level seismic activity going on."

"Not too surprised," offered Corporal Jerkin. "We saw the volcanoes, and except for it bein' kinda blue colored, this here ground is about as much like Hawaii's lava rock as I ever seen."

Sheppard cut in, "Now let's not go jumping to any conclusions, Red. Rodney, are you sure you're not picking up anything more than…I dunno, a herd of Ctesias elk?"

"Ah yes, you're probably right – extraterrestrial elk that, oddly enough, are also able to mimic the same deviations in the electrical and magnetic fields that fluctuate with the pressure and stresses caused by subterranean magma movements as they're thundering across the plains. Please give me _some_ credit for being able to interpret readings on the magic box." He gently wiggled the meter back and forth, driving home his point.

Carson looked at McKay, with a slightly furrowed brow. The distractions offered by the wondrous planet faded abruptly and the physician's usual apprehension of being off-world flooded back upon him. "Is it safe?"

McKay stared at the man. He thought his seismic activity comments made things abundantly clear. "Would you like me to lie?" he answered, then glanced at Sheppard and continued in a dry tone. "I'm apparently good at that." He let the comment hang in the air for a second before continuing. "I'd just like to state for the record that I'm not convinced this is the safest planet to be on."

Sheppard decided at that moment that he needed to write out a list of all the reasons why he kept Rodney on his team and as a friend, laminate it, and keep it with him at all times. It would be a good reminder for why he shouldn't kill the man when his persnickety side reared its irritating head.

"Alright, look," said Sheppard, "just keep an eye on 'the magic box'. If the readings change, let me know. Till then, secure the jumper and let's go."

"Hold up, sir," Jerkin blurted, "almost forgot my secret weapon." The soldier ducked into the small craft and returned a moment later, fastening the latch on his backpack.

Sheppard looked over his people and quickly divided them into teams. They hadn't seen any alicorn from the jumper, or even any sign of them, so it meant searching on foot. Two groups should do it.

Sheppard considered the situation. Carson's looking tense…McKay is making me tense…Not sure I want Teyla and Nonor together just yet…But do I want McKay and Nonor together?...Aw, to hell with it, it will be good for them to work out their differences, and he and Nonor can keep Carson distracted and calm.

"Dr. Bedevere—"

"Oh please, Colonel, call me Robyn…but you can use Raven, too. It's the Native American name I was honored with when I spent a year studying with a Navajo shaman in New Mexico."

"Uh…okay." Sheppard briefly wondered if his sunglasses hid his befuddled expression. "How 'bout you and Sergeant Boris come with me and Teyla. The rest...," he frowned slightly, realizing that they didn't have directions picked yet. He glanced over at the practically prancing tawny-haired Satedan. "Nonor, I don't suppose Haigha passed on any knowledge about where we might find an alicorn?"

"We should find the prettiest, most magnificent spot of beauty. The alicorn would naturally be drawn to such a place." Nonor's return smile was blinding.

Teyla replied gingerly to the suggestion, as if addressing a well-meaning child, "Yeesss…that is a…suggestion worthy of the description you've given of the alicorn. However," she glanced at Sheppard, "if I may suggest, Colonel, another possible method of finding one is to seek out the nearest fresh water source. It is very likely that many of the native creatures will be found in that proximity."

"Didn't see any by that big ass lake," Boris called from where he was now peering into another section of the forest.

"No," Teyla agreed, "but there were many other, smaller lakes." She pointed first to the mountains now a little behind them, which meant heading down off this plateau towards the lake, then to the volcanoes puffing up ahead over the tops of the hills. "It is probable that water run-off from the mountains and volcanoes would channel down into the woods…leading, I am sure, to the most magnificent spots of beauty."

"Volcanoes and mountains it is," replied Sheppard. "Ronon, you guys head up. We'll head down."

"And we'll be in Scotland before ye," muttered McKay.

Carson tentatively spoke up, peering nervously at the volcanoes. "Nonor, would there be any _non_-gentle, magnificent wildlife we should be aware of?"

The tanned warrior brushed a lock of hair over her shoulder and eagerly offered her knowledge. "Ctesias is populated with many creatures worthy of sharing the world with the alicorn. Thecodontias – as graceful out of the water as they are in it. The long-necked Anser, softer than any pillow you've ever rested your head upon. Dromedaria – like ships on land, they are. Pantrog-lodytes, felidae, muridae , loxodonta…but as certain as your mother gave birth to you – the most magnificent of them all is the alicorn."

"Yes, but what he was _asking_," said McKay, none-too-gently "was - do any of them _bite_?"

Nonor giggled softly. "Most are no longer found on this planet. Some terrible disaster removed them from this place long ago." She smiled condescendingly at him. "There is no reason to fear creatures which no longer exist."

"Disaster?" Beckett echoed.

Nonor turned her head sharply, her hair flipping over her shoulder. "It was long ago, a flood I think."

"Rather shy on details," McKay muttered pecking at his scanner. "I'd feel a lot better about this if I actually new what we were getting into."

The beautiful Satedan's jewel-bright eyes flashed with anger. "I have told you everything you need to know!" she snapped. "I would not lie. You should trust what I have to say."

"Trust?" McKay shot back, his voice going high with disbelief.

Sheppard stepped forward to prevent things from escalating. "Alright, that's enough! Knock it off, both of you!" Jesus, when did I become a den mother?

Nonor composed herself and focused on Carson. She beamed a soft smile and answered his question. "This is a peaceful, beautiful world, Doctor. You have nothing to fear here. The animals that now frolic on this world as nearly as perfect as the alicorn - nearly, but nothing could match the majesty of the beloved alicorn."

Flouncing about like a girl, she went on. "One look at the nuttalli and your heart would open – furry and small, with a wiggly nose, long silly ears, and shiny eyes. No two are the same exact shade."

"They sound like colorful rabbits," observed Dr. Bedevere.

"Or rats," McKay added. "Rats every color of the rainbow."

Sheppard cocked his head slightly, narrowed his eyes at the scientist and whispered to him, "Would you at least _try_ to be civil, _please_?"

"She started it."

"Rod-ney." The lifting of the second syllable made it clear that Sheppard was ending the exchange. "Alright, let's go. Check-in thirty minutes from now."

A low, quiet rumble suddenly rolled up from deep beneath the ground they stood on. For several seconds the rocky surface vibrated gently then, just as quickly, disappeared.

"Anybody else feel that?" asked Carson, tensely.

McKay spoke up immediately, "Yes, ladies and gentlemen, as if hunting for a mythical animal wasn't special enough, we're now apparently doing it on a geologically unstable planet."

Sheppard looked distinctly less-thrilled with this mission. He looked at Rodney. "I don't suppose-"

"If I may, Colonel," Bedevere cut in. "I'm slightly psychic and I'm almost certain I know what you're about to ask. Tectonic earthquakes traditionally only occur in fault zones or other regions away from the principal areas of magma movement. This terrain doesn't seem to show any obvious signs of recent ground breakage. The tremors, like ones in California, are probably very common and I don't think they'll be a threat for the time we're here."

She tucked a strand of her raven black hair behind one ear and smiled proudly when she realized the looks she was getting. "I also majored in geology and volcanology and worked briefly with one of NASA's Earth Observing System Volcanology Projects. I know…I'm a geek."

Sheppard was speechless. "Um…thank you for the input." He adjusted his P90 to rest more comfortably across his chest and again gave the order to move out.

Each group moved in their respective directions and John swore he heard Rodney talking to himself as they separated.

"Earthquakes. Fabulous. Are there tornadoes, too? Even better. Maybe we'll get lucky and a house will land on the wicked Amazon of the west. 'Ships on land'…what does that mean anyway? If a ship is on land it doesn't move. What kind of animal is that? They'd be legless lumps!"

**TBC**

[{O}]

A/N: Okay, either you leave me reviews, or I'll be getting out those crispy noodles. Readers, if you care about Peggy the chicken at all, you'll leave a review. She's looking very plump. The lobsters are insistent. Julie hasn't been happy since this 'other woman' came to live in the bunker but she doesn't understand. I only have eyes for MOOO!

A/N: I apologize for that last joke. I feel sick just for typing it. Please, make me feel better about that and give me reviews.


	11. 11:The Hikers

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER 11: THE HIKERS**

A/N: Ah, first of all, I want to thank all of you for the feedback. I'd list every one of your names but that might come off as cheap. Let it be known that your words encourage me and bring light to my dark little Genii bunker under the barn. Without your encouragement I would be a frustrated, pock-marked, boil-riddled evil villain with nothing to do. And you know what happens when evil villains have nothing to do? We plot and plan and eventually do something horrible to those bastards in Atlantis. They're so damn smug with their floating city and their special stargate and their doo-dads and annoying scientists and their commanders with freakish hair. They sicken me!

A/N: To those on the mailing list who insist on maligning my dear Julie by making up stories regarding her state of health - you are wrong. The mere thought that she might be ill has made me unbearably morose. I have spent the afternoon kidnapping a veterinarian and whisking her away (blindfolded) to my barn and underground bunker. The vet (under duress but still acting awfully cocky) thoroughly checked out my lovely cow and has given Julie a clean bill of heath - mentioning only that dear Julie may be a bit on the chubby side. Then, when the vet tried to pull a fast one and escape me, I grabbed for her arm and - ah... I must have tripped or something because the next thing I knew I was staring up at the sky, seeing angels. She deceived me, because, although she wasn't big, but she was wiry! By the time I was able to stumble to my feet, the vet was long gone. But my mind is relieved. Julie is well. The rumor mongers can be soundly ignored. Now, if I could just figure out what to do with the growths on my posterior.

[{O}]

"What are you humming?" McKay asked, obviously irritated.

"Oh?" Becket responded, distractedly. "Nothin'. Nothin' to worry your head over." And he gave McKay a little grin, to hide his nervousness. "Lovely day," he tried.

"Yeah, right," McKay snapped in return, "If you think the constant threat of volcanic eruption and earthquakes is a walk in the park, then the day is lovely as could be."

Beckett looked about at lush growth as they walked along the path, and continued his inane humming.

"Is that necessary?" McKay challenged.

Offering a quiet laugh, Beckett stated, "Just tryin' to keep myself calm. You know, find a little balance."

McKay snorted, and declared, "Not likely to happen here. Besides, if you're singing what I think you're singing...think about the words, will ya? You know, the part that goes, 'where me and my true love will _never meet again?_'"

Beckett's expression soured a little, then perked up again. "Still a nice tune."

McKay just sighed.

They continued their trek over the fantasyland, Beckett's tune slowly fading as McKay continued to shoot him irritated looks. The world seemed brimming with bushes so full of flowers that it made the whole place pink and purple. The trees were filled with puffy, frothy leaves of lime-green coupled with a garish yellow bloom, atop slender orange-ish trunks. In the distance, the volcanoes puffed and gurgled. All things considered, the steaming peaks seemed more ornamental than dangerous.

Beneath the trees, impossibly adorable rabbit-like characters peered at them and wiggled their delightful little noses, unafraid and looking as if they wanted to make friends. They seemed to be dyed in pastel Easter egg colors. Must be those nuttalli that Sheena had mentioned earlier, McKay reasoned.

It was hideous, McKay decided - in the worst possible taste. If one of those little monsters came near him, he'd slapshot it back to where it had come from. He glared at the things, their button-bright eyes shining back at him - radiating only affection. He didn't trust them. How could anyone trust something that annoyingly adorable? Their cozy cuteness made him want to puke.

The physicist kept his eyes on his scanner so as not to fall into their wretched thrall of sweetness. He hoped the next earth tremor opened up a crevasse and swallowed them all up.

"Cute little buggars," Beckett sighed, seeming to calm at the sight of the little sweeties. "Maybe we could bring a couple of 'em back to Atlantis."

"Do it and die," McKay responded under his breath.

Beckett smiled in return, seeing the irritation in the Canadian. "Would make lovely pets," he continued, baiting his friend. It was impossible to ignore the contempt that just dripped from the physicist. "You like cats, don't you? One of those would be a delightful replacement for one."

"Any cat with any self-respect whatsoever would rip the throat out of these things the instant it saw them!" McKay snapped back.

"I dunno," Beckett said, pulling a long face. "Seems too sweet for that." He watched one of the fluff-lumps hippity-hop in the lush grass. Hopefully, he uttered, "Maybe they'd fight back?" But the thing was far too cute and Beckett feared the thing would be lunch for anything that came across it. One of those things had no means of protecting itself and probably fed most of the food chain on this planet.

"So, you don't like them?" Beckett asked innocuously.

"I most certainly do not," McKay snapped back.

"Ah," Beckett replied. "A pity. I was thinkin' of getting' you one of the wee creatures for your birthday." And he enjoyed the grumble that emanated from the Canadian in return.

Behind them, Corporal Jerkin stated in his soft Texan drawl, "We kept rabbits back home."

"Oh," Beckett declared, happily. "I hear they make lovely pets."

"They're better in stew," the corporal told them.

Nonor had surmised that the animal they sought had created the path. She'd pointed out how flawlessly trodden the trail was. "Only the golden hooves of the alicorn might create such perfection."

McKay had exhaled loudly and replied that a good engineer with a plumb line and a yardstick could have achieved a better trail, but the response was met with hard stares from both the Satedans. Well, there was no help for them, Rodney decided; the two were bound to be lost forever in their ignorance.

They continued onward, following the gentle slope of the hill. Nonor led the way, dancing and prancing, her hair lifting and falling in a beautiful halo around her head, her toned skin shining in the perfect sunlight.

Beckett and McKay came next, huffing at times from the gain in altitude, finding themselves unable to keep their gaze from her flawlessly formed bottom that led them. They'd catch either other at it, and offer up stupid grins. Beckett would glance away at the scenery. McKay would go back to his scanner.

Corporal Jerkin followed, looking at the sweet little bunnies as if they were dinner.

Ronon took of the rear of the group, appearing glum and annoyed. A gray cloud seemed to form behind him, and somewhere nearby a little rain fell. But, undoubtedly, on the pretty, faultless (but somewhat shaky) planet, the rain would be warm and welcome, and would be quickly erased by the flawless sunlight. Off in the distance, volcanoes steamed, sending up happily little plumes.

When a gentle, fragrant breeze reached them, Rodney sneezed explosively, breaking the absolute calm of the day. Nonor threw him an annoyed look.

"Allergies!" McKay cried in response. "I got some pretty severe pollen allergies, and you can just bet that this world is riddled with some form of pollen designed to irritate my nasal passages. Absolutely riddled!"

Beckett made a clucking sound. Behind them, Ronon grunted, and Red mumbled. Nonor, turned toward him, rolled her eyes and faced forward, leading them onward.

"What? What?" McKay responded. "Oh, I get it. No one cares if I suffer."

"No," Beckett corrected. "That's not it at all. We just worry that we'll be sufferin' right along with you." And he cordially handed his friend a pocket-pack of Kleenex and hoped that would suffice until he could get his hands on his med kit.

They continued in silence for a time, the sound of their feet only interrupted by the occasional sniffling of McKay, and one or two good nose-blowings. Other than that, the day was beyond reproach.

Out of this quiet, Nonor started yammering, "Oh, long have I waited to set sight on this land!" She held out her arms, stretching them wide as if to encompass all that surrounded them. "It is beautiful beyond words!"

"Nearly as lovely as you, lass," Beckett cooed softly at her.

Nonor beamed. Ronon shot the doctor a dangerous look, while Red looked her up and down, with a satisfied grin. McKay did his best to keep his stomach from disgorging.

"It's a lovely land," Beckett added. "I mean, if you ignore the earthquakes and all that." He licked his lips nervously, trying to forget about that bit.

"All it's missing is the lollipop tree and a rainbow," McKay grumbled, glaring at his scanner. He had no time to defend himself as Nonor moved at him, grabbing (rather viciously in his mind) and spinning him about.

Nonor, her grip undoubtedly cutting off circulation to his arm, pointed with her free hand. There, just over the top of a tree garbed in garishly large fruit - a rainbow - the colors so bright it almost hurt his eyes to gaze in that direction. "Behold!" she breathed.

"Figures," Rodney muttered.

Ronon kept moving, passing their little group, leaving Red to cover their six. The Texan did so without comment.

Nonor, looking rather proud of this small victory, released her victim and skipped back to the front, catching up to her brother. Becket shoved his hands in his pocket and started humming, "Somewhere Over The Rainbow."

"Great," McKay grumbled, and kept up with the doctor. He glared at Beckett, hoping that would be enough to silence him. Carson kept it up, trying not to let the escaping chuckles ruin the pretty tune. Behind them, Red laughed.

Nonor spun about as she danced forward, smiling at her brother then back at her entourage. "It is just like when we were children," she sang. "We spent many a day dreaming of visiting this world of legend. Ronon loved to paint, trying to create a perfect…"

"Quiet," Ronon declared, his voice low and ominous.

Nonor smiled at him, warmly. "Oh, my dear, dear brother was a marvelous artist when he was a child! He may have painted with the masters one day if he'd kept it up and not devoted himself to becoming a soldier."

"Nonor, enough!" Ronon growled.

"Oh!" Nonor responded, sounding hurt. "I am proud of you, Ronon. If you had chosen that other path, you would've become nothing but a weak creature devoted to the non-physical arts. Those that follow that route are so pitiable. I am proud of your choices in life."

Ronon grunted.

McKay looked to Beckett and mouthed, "Pitiable?"

To that Beckett shrugged. Corporal Jerkin pulled up a long stalk of grass and stuck it between his teeth.

But she smiled sweetly. "He was so silly in this phase. His favorite images were posted in our eating chamber and usually depicted his imagining of THIS planet. Oh, he came SO CLOSE to matching the wonders of it. Did you clearly see it in your mind's eye, dear Ronnie?"

"Don't!" Ronon barked. "Don't call me that!"

"Ronon," she corrected. "He made the cleverest little nuttalli and the cutest felidae with their tiny little whiskers and their purple tails. He always put little bows on their tails. So cute."

"Wee whiskers, didja say?" Beckett echoed, sounding amused.

"Bows?" McKay added.

Corporal Jerkin waited, standing hipshot as he chewed on the stalk of grass, though his expression appeared to say, "Ronnie?"

Ronon pushed forward, leaving them behind. "I will not stand for this," he bellowed.

But his sister traipsed next to him, clasping his arm and laying her big head on his massive shoulder. "Brother, dear brother, forgive me. I only wanted to tell these people more about you. You will forgive me?" Her dewy eyes welled. "They obviously don't understand you as they should. They are not close to you as I am. They are not family."

"They know all they need," Ronon grumbled, glancing over his shoulder at the others.

"Yes," Rodney agreed. "That was plenty. Thank you!"

Beckett gave him an elbow in the side and McKay crossed his arms over his chest.

"Ronon, please," Nonor went on. "I am so sorry. You will love me still, won't you?"

Ronon grunted again.

"Please, Ronon, forgive me," Nonor went on piteously. "It's just that I had thought you dead, and you have come back to me – alive. It would break my heart to think you are angry with me. For years and years, I wept thinking of your horrid death. I worked it out in so many ways – and each death I imagined was more horrid than the last. Some were quite – imaginative." She shook her head, trying to get back on track. "My heart was frozen with that pain. Please, Ronon, tell me you forgive me."

Finally stopping his forward motion, Dex regarded his sister, seeing her trembling shoulders, her tear-filled eyes. With a sigh, he touched his sister on the arm and looked into her eyes. "I forgive you, sister."

"Oh joy!" she exclaimed.

"Glad we got that out of the way," McKay mumbled.

And they started moving forward again, Ronon and Nonor linking arms, with Beckett and McKay behind them – with their arms quite plainly at their sides.

Corporal Jerkin followed, pulling down on the brim of his cap as if it was a Stetson.

[{O}]

Bedevere was practically skipping, heading down off the plateau in the direction of the red cliffs with a joyous air. It was all Sheppard, Teyla and Boris could do to keep up with her. She stopped every few moments to photograph another flower or fern.

First, she'd stage a picture, checking the lighting, ensuring that no shadow fell over the scene, trying to find the best composition, and finally snapping the 'perfect' shot. And once she'd achieved everything she wanted, she'd quickly pluck the subject of her picture and deposit it into one of her endless supply of little baggies. She'd scribble a note on the packet and they'd continue on their way.

Sheppard watched the petite woman curiously, amazed at her seemingly endless energy. Rodney was like this when he saw anything Ancient, but, otherwise, he tended to drag his feet, always complaining about having to walk _anywhere_.

Bedevere had prattled on about hiking all the American national parks in her youth, and it seemed she hadn't been lying. "For instance, I walked the entire length of the Pacific Crest Trail," she said, smiling smugly. "The PCT -" and she winked as she used this abbreviation, as if only those 'in-the-know' were allowed to hear it "—Is, like, 2,650-miles long, and it starts in Mexico and runs all the way to Canada, past Yosemite, Crater Lake, Mount Rainier, across the Sierras and the Cascades. It's gorgeous. I mean, you haven't really hiked unless you've done the PCT."

"I've walked part of the Appalachian Trail," Boris said, scratching at his stubbled jaw.

"Oh please, they call that a trail?" Bedevere shook her head dismissively. "I walked that as a teenager. Pleasant, but nothing like the PCT. Of course, the hiking I did in the Andes is a whole 'nother story..."

Was there anything she hadn't done? Sheppard glanced to Teyla to see if she was keeping up with the rapid discourse. The Athosian had a pleasant smile and nodded to her from time to time, but seemed unable to understand most of what Bedevere said - and was perfectly happy in that state.

"You should consider doing it some time, the PCT," she told the others, looking eagerly from one to another, until her face fell with the sudden realization, "That is, the next time you're back on Earth."

They hit the flatlands off the plateau, and the earth had turned from blue to black. The trees seemed to be a more reasonable set of greens here, and were closer together down here. Sheppard finally decided to rein the woman in before she walked into...

"Quicksand!" she squealed frantically, stopping and staring down at what looked like just another patch of black sandy earth to the rest of them. She fluttered her hands at her sides, as if it might help her to keep her balance and prevent her from inexplicably toppling over, headfirst into the substance.

"What?" Teyla said, moving forward, tilting her head curiously. "What is quicksand?"

Boris pushed Bedevere back, and leaned over to stare intently at the ground. After a moment, he looked over at the Colonel.

"She's right, sir."

"And quicksand is...?" Teyla asked again.

Sheppard snorted, turned and picked up a blue and silver specked rock. With an eyebrow arch to Teyla, he tossed it into the patch of ground Bedevere had indicated.

Sure enough, the ground swallowed the rock. Teyla gasped—it was a new phenomenon for her.

"Huh," Sheppard's eyebrows lifted, and he looked at the doctor, who was swallowing nervously, showing that she wasn't quite as gung ho as before. Her hands had stopped flapping since Boris had pushed her back, but she was now nervously clenching them before her. "Nice spotting."

She shrugged. "Part of my geology course. We studied the effects of tides on the west coast of England, specifically the long wash of the Severn estuary. Quicksand is an extremely dangerous natural phenomenon there. I learned to discern dangerous areas of quicksand at a mere glance." She smiled weakly. "Good thing I'm here."

"Uh huh," Sheppard said. "Okay then...shall we move on?" He nodded to Bedevere. "And would you like to take the lead once more?"

"Um," she hesitated slightly, then smiled again. "How about we share it?"

Sheppard gave her a smirk, but moved to stand next to her. She nodded her thanks, and, together, with a lot less dashing about, the four skirted the quicksand and continued their "quest" for the alicorn.

[{O}]

Beckett kept his gaze moving, smiling contentedly at the vision of loveliness all around them, trying not to think about the possibility of earthquakes and volcanic eruptions. He kept trying to find the cute little nuttalli who seemed just as interested in them.

Rodney looked at the scanner. It was impossible to pinpoint any specific lifeform, he decided. This place was abounding in life, so the scanner was of little use, but his study of it meant he could look away from other things. Still, one had to remain alert.

He caught sight of one of those obnoxious creatures hopping from one tree to another. With a grimace, he asked, "You sure there's nothing here that can… hurt us?"

"Hurt you?" Nonor echoed, turning to McKay and giving him a haughty look. "Is that all you ever worry about."

For a moment, McKay looked taken aback, then he responded, "Well, yes. It's a healthy thing to be concerned about."

Scowling in disgust, Nonor turned, and continued her skipping stride. "There is nothing to fear on this planet. The  
creatures here live in harmony and love. They have been untouched by the horrible hands of science and are left to live in peace."

"Horrible hands of science," Beckett repeated quietly to McKay.

Rodney held out one hand for examination. "I've been told that I have lovely hands," he said with a smile.

Beckett grinned in quiet conspiracy. Red looked away, not wanting to comment.

Nonor went on, oblivious, "It is not as if the vile molemen would come to the surface in the daylight." And suddenly she stopped, the mere thought of the creatures making her weak.

"Sister," Ronon called softly, still clasping her arm.

"They are creatures of darkness… and dirt!" she spat out the words. "They are disgusting and blind, living only to pull you beneath the surface and eat your flesh – right from the BONE!" She shuddered visibly.

Beckett looked concerned, and felt for his medical bag. McKay just sighed and shook his head.

"I am sorry, dear brother. The thought of the loathsome creatures made me weak for a moment. I shall continue." And she smiled bravely at her brother.

McKay just grimaced. To Beckett, he complained, "She thinks of a mole and gets weak, yet if I mention a little healthy concern over our safety…"

But Beckett had raised a hand to quiet him and strode on to catch up with the others.

The trail turned slowly, coming over a rise, and then to the crest of the hill. Nonor and Ronon stopped and tawny-haired woman let out a gasp.

The sunlight, coming up around her, gave Nonor a golden glow as she pointed urgently. Ronon was motionless beside her, looking intently at something still hidden from the others. They seemed locked, frozen in time.

Beckett considered whether Nonor was having another attack, when she suddenly proclaimed, "Alicorn!" She never turned toward them, as she clung to her brother. In pure glee, she cried, "I have seen an alicorn! Never have I felt such joy!"

McKay and Beckett scrambled to catch up, herded forward by Corporal Jerkin. They came around the siblings to gaze down the other side of the hill. There, near the base of the hill, stood the object of their quest – the single horned alicorn of legend.

"Oh, brother!" she exclaimed, her hands wrapped around Ronon's arm.

"Oh brother is right," McKay grumbled. "Looks more like a llama to me,"

**TBC**

[{O}]

A/N: Let it be said one more time that I have adore your reviews. Every one of you who takes the time to pound out a note or two to me should be commended. I'd hug and kiss each of you, but I am an evil Genii and a) I don't do that sort of thing... and b) I should be careful about touching anyone until the flare up dies down a bit. The reviews... thank you.

A/N: Okay, so I ate the chicken! I couldn't help myself! I roasted it with butter and rosemary and it was good. I feasted with the lobsters, mongi and cobras (and by 'feasting with' I actually mean 'I also ate'). My larder is now well stocked with Mongoose Jam, pickled cobra and canned lobster bits. I am sated. Thank you, Julie, for the Venus Fly Traps! They did their job of capturing the creatures when I chased them pell-mell around the bunker. The Flytraps certainly grew quickly - and continue to surround the bunker. Meanwhile, Sydney the lizard has managed to vault out of the coffee pot - and that minx of a mongoose escaped my clutches. Might have missed a cobra or two. Now what should I expect?

A/N: GIVE ME MORE REVIEWS!


	12. 12:The Alicorn

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER TWELVE: THE ALICORN**

A/N: Your feedback is tasty - like a slab of cobra steak, spread with mongoose jam and topped with a dollop of lobster goo. mmmmm. More please!

[{O}]

The alicorn stood proud in the small glade, as if fully aware of its magnificence. The sun glimmered over its sleek white coat. A hint of a curl twisted the supple fur, softening its outline in the afternoon sun. A golden horn spiraled from its forehead, tapering from a wide base to a finely honed point.

Lowering its head, the creature grazed on the waving sweet green grass. Fresh blades lapped at its shorthaired legs, whispering across beautifully formed fetlocks and pasterns. Its cloven hooves remained invisible within the nitrogen fed grasses.

A gentle breeze ruffled fine delicate hairs along its body, gently lifting and curling them. They caught the glare of the sun and seemed to shimmer in the light, giving the creature a peaceful aura.

The alicorn's erect ears lazily twisted left and right, pivoting effortlessly on its fine-boned head. They tapered to a point and nearly touched over its poll. Soft doe brown eyes swiveled left and right in a lazy manner under the protection of long, naturally curved lashes.

Corporal Jerkin set down his pack to withdraw a length of black twill rope, getting ready to show off the special skill that had Sheppard choosing the newcomer marine for this particular mission. The others, though, just stared at it in disbelief.

Mesmerized, Beckett watched the creature from the cover of the forest. Birds chirped in the background, a soft breeze blew across the alicorn's flanks from a westerly direction. The sun gently warmed the area.

Nonor was right - there was nothing to fear here.

The alicorn was beautiful, a magnificent creature. Well-defined muscles bulged and flexed from its elongated neck across its massive shoulders to its flanks. Its hindquarters were rounded and no less muscular than the rest of its body. The powerful back legs tapered to the fine-boned lower legs of an animal that was made for speed and power.

It casually shifted its weight once again, exposing its delineating muscular physique under the shimmering gleam of its startlingly white coat. It practically glowed in the sunlight. The sun wrapped around the prominent horn accenting a radiating golden halo.

The proud statuesque figure was more breathtaking than any young girl's fantasy of mythical woodland creatures.

After a moment, the alicorn raised its head, tenderly grinding a tuff of lush grass that hung limply from the corners of its petite mouth. Its pointed split upper lip hinted at prehensile tendencies, tossing it from a simple grazing animal to a browser.

McKay was right, too. It appeared more similar to Llama than an equine.

From across the glade behind the alicorn a shadow moved. Ronon and Nonor spotted it first. Their sudden shift in attention drew McKay and Beckett's notice. The foursome watched with furrowed brows as the shadow on the opposite side of the glade shifted again.

Corporal Jerkin skirted around the edge of the woods. He placed his gun down against a tree and hefted something in his other hand.

"Wait, already?" McKay muttered. "I thought the plan was to observe the creature first."

Beckett merely shrugged his shoulders and shook his head. He sighed, leaned against a tree, content to just observe the alicorn in peace.

Across the way, the corporal straightened, braided rope in hand.

Red inched from the cover of the forest, hunched low, the lariat loop held loosely in his left hand and the coil in his right.

The alicorn faced away from the marauding soldier and peered into the sun.

A tiny, young nuttalli hopped through the grass. Its bobbed purple tail twitched as if wagging. The very ends of its downy coat caught and reflected the gentle afternoon sunlight. The young nuttalli stood on its hind feet and pawed playfully at the alicorn.

The magnificent beast tenderly bent its head and lowered its horn toward the tiny creature.

The nuttalli danced away only to stop and paw at the air again. Its tiny bobbed tail waved with heightened vivacity.

The benevolent frolicking continued. The giant shimmering alicorn dutifully played cat-and-mouse with the tiny creature, as the stretching rays of an afternoon sun caressed them.

Not a bug buzzed near the foursome that watched the serene play from the edge of the wood.

Beckett exhaled dreamily allowing a dimpled smile to brighten his whiskered face. It had seemed like ages since he had ever felt such warmth and peace.

McKay grunted in nauseated disgust. He fiddled with his scanner impatient to get things moving, and then reached up to touch the radio on his ear. "Colonel?" he whispered, not wanting to scare off the creature they sought. "Colonel, I think we found one of those alicorns."

Meanwhile, Corporal Jerkin stalked closer, letting the loop of the lariat dangle further from his body as he straightened his left arm, preparing to cast it aloft. McKay paused, half impressed, half jealous of the Texan's confidence and obvious skill. He'd heard the boy had grown up on a ranch, and had competed in a rodeo circuit before entering the service – they were about to see why he had won so many ribbons.

The alicorn continued its gentle play with the toddling nuttalli. McKay's radio buzzed with a moment of static and he heard a garbled voice. He frowned, annoyed.

"I mean, it has to be an alicorn," McKay continued. "It has one big horn, but it looks more like a llama than a unicorn. Guess that makes it a, uh, llamacorn." Someone groaned through the radio, and McKay smiled.

Red crouched lower to the ground, grapevining silently around the blind side of the alicorn towards its beautiful horned head.

"Don't see what the big fuss is about," Rodney continued his commentary, wishing the transmission was clearer and he could hear what the colonel was saying. All he could differentiate was a snappiness in his responses.

The alicorn lowered its triangular face and shook its horn at the young purple-tailed nuttalli, causing the little creature to chirp with delight and dance to the right. It pawed at the lowered horn delighted in the play.

Red widened the loop, accommodating for the spiral fine-point horn.

The alicorn brushed its golden horn against the side of the nuttalli, delicately knocking the weanling to the side. The young creature let out with a gentle squeal as it lay on its back and wrapped two soft paws around the point and chirped.

"Doesn't seem like much to me," McKay added.

Jerkin raised the loop over his head slowly and began to swing it, waiting for the animal to stop its play and lift its head.

The play ended with one quick movement. The alicorn suddenly lunged forward fiercely burrowing its horn into the ground. The little nuttalli squealed in terror as the sharp point was rammed through its body.

Beckett squeaked and pushed himself upright nearly tripping over his own feet. McKay's hand fell from his ear, all attempts at commentary abandoned, and he lashed out an arm to steady the medical doctor.

Unfazed, Corporal Jerkin swung the rope a second time and tossed it the moment the alicorn raised its head, the nuttali cleanly spitted on its horn. He leaned forward into the throw, extending his left arm straight. His shoulder and elbow extended and followed the motion of his hand and snapping wrist. The lariat loop sailed wide and true through the air toward the alicorn.

The alicorn pirouetted on its hind feet, raising its head from the grass flinging a thick tuft of grass and rich dark soil into the air. The young bobbed-tail nuttalli twitched and eeped. Its small legs twitched and trembled as little hoarse squeaks gurgled from its bloodied mouth.

Then the alicorn bared its teeth...it's very pointy, very sharp teeth.

Beckett gasped.

McKay's eyes widened. His left hand fumbled blindly at his holster. The scanner in his right hand and his panic marred his futile attempts.

Nonor, seeing his intent, hissed and pulled McKay's left arm up and away, further interfering with his attempts to free his sidearm. Gripping his left wrist tightly, she whispered harshly, "The alicorn must not be harmed!"

Ronon frowned at her, but had yet to pull his own weapon, not sure there was any real danger yet.

Suddenly, the alicorn lunged forward with impossible speed, dropping its head and massive horn under the sailing lariat loop and then dove upward, snapping its neck and head toward the sky. The lariat lapped ineffectively across its extended shoulders and flowing mane – and the alicorn kept moving.

"Look out!" Beckett shouted, well aware it was far too late. Nonor's hold on McKay's arm tightened like a vice, fighting his attempt to get free.

The spiraled, thick-base horn, impaled the shocked corporal's abdomen with frightening speed, thrusting upward and forward. The force punched Red's abdomen backward - jolting his head forward toward his chest.

Ronon reached for his gun but Nonor's other hand grabbed his arm as well, now holding two men back.

"It was just defending itself!" she insisted, tightening her grip. "We can not harm it!"

"Let go of me," Ronon snapped back, pulling his arm free of her grip. The two Satedans stared at one another. A soft choking sound emanated from Beckett. McKay wrenched his own arm free while she was distracted, and finally put his scanner away to free his right hand.

But it was already too late.

Red gasped. His grip on the rope tightened reflexively and then loosened as he was flung from his feet and tossed into the air with the horn burrowing grotesquely into his body. With a wet groan, the horn punctured through Corporal Jerkin's back, tenting his coat before shooting itself free with blood and strips of thickened gore wrapped around its spirals.

The alicorn reared on its hind legs pawing the air with its front feet. Red's body slid down the remainder of the horn, sandwiching the tiny body of the young nuttalli between Red's back and the alicorn's forehead.

Thick blood ran down the mythical creature's face, marring the white fur. Its flared nostrils aerosoled the densely running blood, spraying it in a wide fanning arc. It formed a red halo around the creature's muzzle. Fine crimson droplets dusted the trampled green grass at its feet.

The alicorn's brown eyes rolled in its majestic head, exposing the whites. It pounded its feet, tossing its head left and right, up and down. The limbs of the dead flopped listlessly to and fro. The alicorn reared again, screeching a fierce high-pitched scream.

The four spectators watched in macabre awe and horror.

Red's legs and hands twitched nonsensically back and forth as nerve endings shorted out. Fingers curled and partially straightened as the final throws of death slowly stole physical movement. Beckett could discern through the thickened gore the bared and misaligned vertebrae. A section of spinal column lay exposed to the sun as ribs peeled back from the body like a fried onion flower appetizer.

"I think I'm going to be sick," McKay admitted softly.

The alicorn spun on its hind feet and stared in the direction of the four observers. The creature reared again, slashing the air with its cloven hooves. Thickened blood cascaded down its wavy coat, congealing slowly in the sun's warmth.

The alicorn spun again on its hind feet and effortlessly galloped for the eastern edge of the glade. It kicked and bucked violently tossing its hind feet into the air, letting loose with a crescendo of exploding flatulence. It crashed through the trees with Jerkin and the young nuttalli still skewered to its drying blood coated golden horn.

The four stood at the edge of the wood in silent shock.

Beckett swallowed thickly and blinked.

McKay, wide-eyed, rubbed at his left wrist, already turning red from the Satedan woman's grip, and lowered his head, taking in a deep breath.

Ronon rubbed at his head and shot a furious glare at his sister.

Nonor stared into the meadow and then to the others. "One should not try to rope the alicorn."

"Oh, that's just fantastic. You tell us that now?!" McKay sputtered with indignant horror. "Anything else we should know about this mythical, not-so-benign beast that you have failed to mention? Or didn't know about?" Rodney's bare accusations were laced with fear and trepidation.

"Enough, McKay," Ronon stated quietly, but with an air of unending resignation. Ronon shifted his notice to the silent medical doctor who still stared into the empty clearing. "Doctor Beckett?"

"Poor Lou," Beckett said softly, his shocked gaze turned to McKay. "It was like watching Vlad the Impaler."

"Vlad the Impaler?" McKay sputtered, shaking his head with quick hurried, disbelieving movements. "Lord, Carson your knowledgebase frightens me sometimes." He looked back into the clearing, "Should...should we go after it? Try to...get Corporal Jerkin somehow?"

"Probably already eating him," Ronon stated matter-of-factly. McKay grimaced.

"Did you have to say that? That was an image I was trying to avoid, thank you very much."

"Amazing beast, really," Beckett said distractedly not paying attention to those around him. "Did you notice how strong its nuchal ligament must be…Stronger than bull's I'd hazard." Beckett turned his attention from the empty meadow to McKay, who was eyeing him with concern. "We're doomed."

As if on cue, at that same moment, the alicorn, sans its two most recent victims, burst back into the glade, head and neck still covered in drying red blood. It stopped, stared at the four people still standing on the edge, and charged, bellowing a cry that sounded more like a hyena's scream than a roar.

If anything, it was even more terrifying.

**TBC**

[{O}]

A/N: ... and the loveliest of the all was the alicorn! Sounds like my kind of pet! I hope you enjoyed the gore!

A/N: The bunker is quieter now that the interlopers have been removed. The lizard is still missing. I fear Sydney is in the plumbing somewhere. Something hisses behind the wainscoting - might be a snake. I have named him Burt. I think a stray mongoose, Vivian, is living somewhere in my hat collection. It will take some time to go through them all. Julie has begun the process of removing the Venus Flytraps. The plan is for her to eat them, but they are proving difficult to consume. Keep trying, Julie, my sweet! I know you can take them!


	13. 13:The Escape

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER THIRTEEN: THE ESCAPE**

A/N: Your feedback continues to satisfy me. I served up gore yesterday. I am hoping for more comments.

[{O}]

Ronon didn't hesitate this time - he fired three solid gut-tearing red blasts at the creature, despite Nonor's scream at him not to. They impacted the blood-soaked white coat...and disappeared. Nothing. It barely slowed the alicorn down. McKay had his gun out as well, and had managed to get off a few rounds of his own at the same time, but the bullets, like the Satedan weapon fire, had simply disappeared inside the thick fur.

"Oh, this isn't good," McKay said quickly, stepping backwards, hands shaking around the apparently useless weapon as the alicorn got within 'whites of its eyes' range. "This is really not good!"

"Run!" Ronon yelled, grabbing Beckett's arm, as he was the closest to him, and spinning him around. "Scatter!" With a shove, he got the physician moving, tearing away through the forest in a random direction. Ronon followed, glancing only once to his right in time to see that McKay was already tearing off in a different direction, Nonor on his heels.

Ronon put all his energy into running then, away from the others, leaping over a log and then down the trail - the path of least resistance - hoping that the beast would follow him, and not either of the softer scientists...or his sister.

As he heard the galloping hooves behind him, he smiled, pleased it had worked.

And then he realized it was gaining.

[{O}]

"_COLONEL_!"

McKay's abrupt shout over the radio caused Sheppard to jump about a mile. He, Teyla, Doctor Bedevere (sniffing loudly), and Sergeant Boris had been gingerly stepping through a close-set forest with some rather curious geysers...that erupted sulfur gas. Each geyser only erupted for a second, sending a stream of the noxious fumes into the air about six feet high, coating everything near it. They'd quickly learned that, just before one of the nearly invisible geysers was about to explode, there would be a strange sort of whistling noise. Consequently, none of the small group was speaking as they listened for the telltale high-pitched whine.

And for that reason, Sheppard had turned down his radio when McKay started blathering on about something earlier – for his voice to be heard now – the scientist must have been screaming.

Which explains why McKay's shout had Bedevere fainting into Boris's arms (her second such faint so far - the strangeness of the planet was getting to her).

"McKay?" Sheppard yelled back.

"_Do not approach_," Rodney gasped for air, and Sheppard realized the scientist was running, "_the alicorn! Whatever_," another gasp, "_you do! Corporal Jerkin_," another deep heaved breath, "_dead_!"

"What? How? Anyone else hurt?"

"_No...time_," McKay gasped back, "_must...find others_!"

"You split up? Ronon! Beckett! Respond!"

"_Busy here, Colonel_!" Carson's breathy reply came over the radio waves. "_Running_!"

"I get that." Sheppard glanced worriedly at Teyla, who was gripping the P90 on her vest tightly. "Ronon?"

No answer came to the call. Sheppard's eyes widened, "Ronon!"

"SHHHH!"

"Ronon?" Sheppard frowned, tapping the radio again. Did the Satedan just hush him?

"Uh," Bedevere said softly, where she was still leaning against the muscular arms of Sergeant Boris, "That wasn't Ronon." She sounded oddly dreamy as she spoke. Sheppard turned to look at her, and found she was staring straight up at the trees overhead.

Slowly, Teyla, Sheppard and Sergeant Boris tipped their heads back.

Puffy-fluffy creatures filled the tree branches overhead. What had Nonor called them? Nuttalli? The cute, purple, pink and teal colored bunny-like creatures watching them. Noses twitched, cottontails wagged, and ears flopped endearingly.

"There must be over a hundred up there," Teyla whispered wonderingly.

At her voice, one of the closer nuttalli, a purple one, actually raised a cute little paw to his nose and blew...

"SHHHHHH!"

"Awww," Bedevere murmured, unable to help herself. "How cute."

And that's when the nuttalli attacked—en masse.

[{O}]

Ronon had heard Sheppard's call, but he was sort of busy trying not to be skewered. He was flying through the woods, no longer checking behind him to see if the insane beast was still following him. He knew that stopping to look would only earn him a spear through his back. No - he just ran, eating up ground at an incredible rate.

His lungs were burning now, his legs almost on automatic. The landscape was beginning to blur around him. He was running up a hill, he knew that much. His legs were really beginning to hate him, and his heart felt ready to burst out of his chest it was beating so fast.

And then he saw his salvation - a massive low-lying branch on a tree that looked to cap this tiny mountain he'd just run up.

Pulling on reserves of strength, he sped up, shoving his gun inside his vest as he did so, and reached both hands for the branch.

He caught it and swung up, vaulting up and over the branch...and landing upright atop it. Not even pausing, he reached for the next highest branch and pulled himself higher - out of alicorn range, because there was no way that thing could climb.

Only when he was high enough did he risk turning to look behind him.

To see nothing.

He was alone. The alicorn was no longer chasing him.

"Damn," he muttered, oddly disappointed. Hell, he'd just performed the most incredible...

Aw hell. Who cares. He reached up to touch his radio, to finally answer Sheppard's call.

And then he saw her.

He was high enough to see the clearing they had just escaped from, a circle of soft blue-green near the bottom of the hill. The blood-stained alicorn, a mere tiny creature from this height, was already back there, eating nonchalantly. Not a care in the world.

And his sister had just walked out into the field with it, her golden hair like a beacon to her brother.

Ronon was down the tree and racing down the hillside at a speed that made his earlier gait seem like a toddler's crawl.

[{O}]

McKay slid down a slimy embankment, black and turquoise mud coating his trousers, and fell the last few feet. Panting for breath, he stopped at the bottom and looked up, trying to see behind him. Nothing appeared to be looming over the top of the mud bank—no alicorns, no sickly molemen, no obnoxiously cute (but now obviously deadly, since he'd now seen their teeth as well) nuttalli... nothing. He had escaped. He didn't know how long he'd been running, but, for a moment there, it felt like this entire world was out to get him. He'd seen enough sharp pointy things on innocent looking creatures to last a lifetime.

Heaving a sigh of relief, he stood up...and immediately slipped onto his ass again.

"Ugh!" he mumbled, shaking the black, sticky mud off his now covered hands. "Perfect. Just perfect! Well done, McKay!" And he sneezed again, taking a moment to rub his nose on a somewhat clean spot on his sleeve.

When he got up this time, he actually managed it with some dignity. Well...coordination. Dignity was somewhat of a lost cause when you could feel black mud dripping off your nose.

Staggering forward, he looked around, trying to spot the puffing smoke of the distant volcanoes that he'd been using as a landmark. Amazingly, they were where he hoped they would be - off to his left. He had managed to come around in a circle back to the trail. With any luck...

He stumbled forward, catching his aching feet and burning legs a little on the low roots, aiming for the lighter patch of forest up ahead.

He slowed when he realized he was moving a bit too clumsily...and loudly.

Forcing his exhausted legs to perform, he managed an almost silent walk, keeping to rocks and large tree roots. Teyla would be proud.

The area before him opened up, and he gave a tiny squeak of amazement. It was the same glade, the same clearing that they'd spotted the alicorn. Perfect! Now he just had to...

The thought died as he realized he wasn't the only one to return to this clearing. He swallowed convulsively, staring at the massive alicorn as it feasted bloodily on a nuttalli it had caught. At least it wasn't the poor corporal. He shuddered, unable to complete the thought. Briefly, he had considered trying to find Red's body again...then quickly decided such a feat was better done from the safety of the jumper...or perhaps the Daedalus. When was it due back from Earth again?

Okay, he thought, trying to remain calm, just skirt around the edge. The path's that-a-way, so...

His whole body went rigid, staring in shock as Nonor entered the clearing not far from his position...and walked calmly and confidently up to the alicorn.

"Oh, you have got to be kidding me," McKay groaned.

[{O}]

**TBC**

A/N: Nonor - she's as sharp as a bag of wet hair

A/N: It's been quiet around here lately. The majority of the animals have been eaten or canned and stored away. Julie wanders about, eyeing the Venus Flytraps. The plants are getting rather tall. I'm not sure how I'll get to the mailbox outside the bunker. I'm expecting a catalog from "Guns and Stuff", so I'll have to go out sooner or later. Hmmm. Maybe I'll wait until tomorrow.


	14. 14:The Screwed

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER FOURTEEN: THE SCREWED**

A/N: Okay, the Venus Flytraps are starting to alarm me. Julie cannot keep up with them. They grow wildly. Should I be concerned about this? That, and I believe that the lizard is still in the bunker. I have brewed another pot of coffee and am hoping to entice him back. I would be happier knowing he's in the pot and not about to drop down on my head at some unknown moment. If any snakes or mongoosoids remain, they have become quiet - too quiet.

[{O}]

"That woman seriously has a screw loose," McKay muttered, stepping over the roots at his feet and reaching the edge of the glade. Long, soft grasses brushed his legs. A breeze caused a massive amount of yellow pollen to skim his face, and he clapped a hand over his mouth to stop himself from sneezing. After a moment, he lowered it, having somehow succeeded.

Sniffing, and in awe at her blatant idiocy, he watched as Nonor continued to move forward. She wasn't far from him, really - maybe ten feet. From his angle inside the trees, he was staring at her statuesque profile, noting the full lips lifted in a soft, beatific smile and cerulean blue eyes intent only on the alicorn on the other side of the glade. She stopped about fifteen feet from him, still on the same angle, and bent over slightly, holding out a hand.

What the hell was she doing? His heart began to beat faster, and he looked towards the alicorn. It had stopped feasting, and had lifted its head. With the languorous grace of a highly toned predator, it turned its beautiful head in her direction, large, golden eyes focusing on the beautiful Nonor as she took another couple of steps closer, hand still outstretched towards it.

The alicorn snorted, pawing angrily at the earth. Blood snorted from its nostrils.

Oh God, it was going to kill her!

Quickly, he snapped his gun out of its holster, ignoring the sweatiness of it under his hands and he managed to get both hands around the handle.

He stopped again when he realized Nonor was talking to it.

"Here, ali-ali-ali-corn!" she cooed, "Here, sweety baby. You cute little thing! Come to Nonnie..." She rubbed the fingers together on her outstretched hand as if she had catnip in it. McKay was pretty sure all the alicorn was seeing was the prime, lean, Grade A meat of her arm.

Nonor, though, was oblivious. "Come on, baby sweetums. My little honey bunch. Come to mama. I got a treat for you, you little pastry-pie you..."

McKay stilled the bile rising in his throat - now was not the time to throw up. But, oh, he so, so wanted to.

The alicorn twisted, tilting its head at her, the sharp-as-diamond-cut-steel horn reflecting the sun. The hooves clawed divots in the earth.

"That's it, baby," Nonor called, the sugar practically dripping from her lips. "Come to Nonnie..."

And it did - at full speed.

It leapt and charged, squealing that high pitched hyena-like roar again. In that second, Nonor realized that something was, possibly, _not quite right_, and with the sort of speed and alacrity only an extremely fit athlete could manage, jumped to the side and rolled. The alicorn flew through the space she had been a second before, its skin-and-muscle piercing horn carving through empty air at what would have been chest height.

Nonor continued to roll and leapt back to her feet, ending up only feet from McKay. She danced backwards, panting heavily. The alicorn hit earth and skidded, clumps of black and blue mud erupting from beneath the cloven hooves. It turned and faced her, shaking is massive head like a warning.

But Nonor didn't give up. Pasting a slightly weaker smile on her face, her eyes a little less certain, she bent over and held out her hand again.

"No one's trying to hurt you, magnificent one," she squeaked out. She swallowed, and when she spoke again, her normal dulcet tones were back. "I'm a warrior, like you. Let's be friends. I just want to cuddle and love you. I'm sure that, once you get to know me..."

Apparently, alicorns were as good at spotting fakes as McKays. It screamed again and charged, but this time, Nonor seemed to freeze, her eyes opening in terror. She suddenly straightened, and threw her hands up in front of her face with a scream of her own.

McKay dived into her side, driving her out of the path of the horn at the last second. The alicorn landed, bucked a bit, and turned. McKay and Nonor rolled along the ground, sliding in the soft grass and muddy earth. McKay shoved himself up on one arm and turned on his side, to see the alicorn pawing at the earth again, not ten feet away. Nonor was doing the same, though she was already halfway up.

"Run!" McKay yelled, shoving at Nonor's hide with his left hand as his right came up, pointing the 9mm at the beast. He fired, shot after shot, but the alicorn just soaked up each bullet as it lowered its head to glare at them. McKay turned, to see that Nonor was already several feet away, backing up from him and the alicorn.

Oh God, he was in real trouble, wasn't he...

The alicorn charged, squealing. McKay twisted back around to get to his hands and knees under him, trying desperately to get to his feet, but all the mud worked against him. He wanted to scream, but the air whooshed out of his lungs as the unmistakable, painful crush of two, golden hooves landed flat on his back. He somehow managed to suck in some air then, and screamed for real as the alicorn bit deeply into his left shoulder.

New gunshots exploded through the clearing, and the alicorn slid off his back. And that's all McKay knew before passing out.

[{O}]

Beckett stood like a fool on the edge of the clearing, firing round after round uselessly into the alicorn's hide. He knew, even before he started firing, that it would do no good. He figured it out while he was running—the creature's horn. It healed the alicorn almost instantly, just as the salve made from it had healed Teyla almost instantly. But, at least, the force of the bullets had driven the creature off of Rodney. It backed up, looking annoyed, but relatively unharmed by the assault. He couldn't kill it.

But he didn't care about that now. All he cared about was distracting that thing long enough to get Rodney out of there. He'd seen the whole thing - Nonor foolishly trying to win over the alicorn, McKay saving her life - and Beckett's innate bravery finally overcame his terror when McKay went down, and he joined in to save his friend.

"Get him out of there!" he yelled at Nonor, hoping she understood. She was sprawled on her rear a fair bit away from McKay's prone body now. She didn't move at his yell, staring from McKay to the alicorn with the eyes of one too shocked to hear anything.

"Nonor!" he yelled again, "You have to get McKay..." He trailed off, because the alicorn was now charging straight for him now, the horn pointed down, fresh blood caked over its entire muzzle and dried black on the sharp pointed spear. It would not be stopped this time.

"Oh, bugger," he whispered softly.

And then his gun ran out of bullets. Terror gripping him, he spun around and ran...straight into a tree.

[{O}]

**TBC**

A/N: Yeah, they're screwed.

A/N: REVIEWS! I want them. Give them to me. I deserve many and you are just the person to sate my need. Come on!

A/N: Julie? Hmmm. I thought I heard her moo. I should go out and check on her. I shouldn't be long. That is, unless the Venus Flytraps have...


	15. 15:The Running

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER FIFTEEN:** **THE RUNNING**

A/N: Okay... okay. I am BACK! I would apologize for my absence, but an apology is not the sort of thing that the leader of the Genii Special Forces would offer. Suffice it to say that an opportunity arose and I did my best to take advantage of it. Those idiots that have been squatting in Atlantis showed their craven faces at one of our Genii outposts on a desert planet - and I had yet another opportunity to kidnap the brain that is attached to McKay. I did so with the use of blinky lights and firing off a few rounds in the direction of his compatriots.

I was carefree, of course, thinking that Sheppard would not be able to continue after us. I dragged the wretched McKay past a castle of a long dead warlord, over a bridge of evil, through a canyon of grandeur, onto a ship over a man-made lake, then down a dry wash (where McKay fell on his ass), finally ending up in a haunted domicile. Ha ha ha ha! - but Sheppard managed to follow. Damn him! I am stunned that he was able to keep up with my sleek and silvery vehicle! The only way he would have managed to follow would be if he swam, ran, and used one of the two-wheeled self-powered devices of the local people. I applaud his stamina, even though I hate him.

Okay, so he caught up with us and was able to free the McKay while I was getting some coffee and this marvelous beverage of carbonation and caramel color (I am assured that it has no calories). Alas, I have been foiled again.

A/N: I am back! I am Kolyaaa! Fear me!

[{O}]

"Run Away!" Bedevere's voice cut through the chaos of teal and pink and purple fur. "Run away! Run away!"

Sheppard would have been offended at the scientist's audacity to give orders, but he was too distracted by the onslaught. Tiny vicious creatures came at him one after another. No sooner than he shook one off, that two more fluffy bunnies were there, gnashing their sharp teeth and sinking them deep into his arms and legs. He shouted in pain as he swatted wildly, unable to get a clear shot. He could hear Bedevere screaming and Teyla thrashing next to him.

Boris fired into a mass of the creatures, shouting almost joyfully as fluffy-fur flew, "Right! One rabbit stew comin' right up!"

They moved as a group, backing away from the attack, trying to push one another to safety even as they fought off the tenacious and colorful creatures. They bumped into trees, tripping and hauling each other back to their feet to avoid losing anyone under the mass of nuttalli. Teyla managed to get a shot at the furry demons. The nuttalli exploded in a mess of blood and gore, reminding Sheppard of a bad B horror movie.

"SHHHHH!" The animals hissed and spat at them, but backed off for a moment, apparently impressed by the show of force.

Sheppard and the others kept moving. He wasn't sure how much ground they had covered, but he realized they had managed, as a group, to back themselves up against one of the red cliffs they had seen when flying in.

Okay, Sheppard thought, now what? A quick glance upward assured him that no one would be able to climb up it to safety.

"This is bad. Really bad," John muttered, searching for a way out. He glanced in the direction way they'd come, as he pressed a hand over one of the more impressive wounds on his arm. Who would have thought...?

Teyla fired off another round at the nuttalli. Though they hadn't advanced again, they appeared to be regrouping.

"What are we going to do, sir?" Boris asked. "As much as I enjoy a good firefight, I don't think we can keep this up much longer." Blood trickled down the side of his face but he didn't bother to wipe it away. He joined Teyla, firing on the furry creatures, lurking only a few yards from them, then looked at Sheppard for an answer.

John frowned as his eyes scoured the hillside and the area around them for any sign of escape.

Bedevere sobbed hysterically on the other side of Teyla, and Sheppard was tempted to smack the woman just to shut her up. If the Athosian wasn't in the way...

He couldn't think. Brightly-colored nuttalli scrambled through the thick green thicket. So many of them – they turned the ground into a multicolored carpet. And then they scurried up into the trees. Damn it! The creatures were above their heads again – putting Sheppard and the others in a bad position.

They were getting ready for another attack, preparing to leap down on them. Sheppard could see the fluffy blobs as they moved, huddling together on the branches, thick as cherry blossoms in April. They were biding their time for just the right moment. The fanged puffballs were everywhere, surrounding the bloody and tattered group.

Scowling, Sheppard knew that there had to be a way out. He was not going to be done in by a shower of fluffy pink bunnies! He searched and then he spotted it. There! Beyond Dr. Bedevere, behind another copse of trees, he could see a lightly trodden path leading up and around the cliff. It was scaleable.

"A trail," he nodded in the direction he meant. "I'll hold them off. I want the three of you to run as soon as I start firing."

"We can not leave you," Teyla argued breathlessly.

"I'll be right behind you. Now go."

Even as he gave the order, the animals began to surge. "Go! Go! Go!" he screamed as he fired at the fuzz nuggets, feeling Boris with Teyla slip behind him and run. Bedevere, however, froze. She stared wide-eyed at the approaching fur balls and simply...screamed.

"Go," Sheppard waved to Teyla to go on when she stopped to grab Bedevere. Grabbing the slender doctor's arm, Sheppard attempted to pull her with him as he continued to fire on the attacking horde.

Teyla and Boris ducked down the pathway, trying to put space between them and the candy-colored critters.

There were more of the nuttalli this time. The puffy rabbit-like creatures were multiplying like - well - rabbits. The ever-intensifying hushing hiss seemed to be a clarion call for others. Sheppard knew he was in trouble. He couldn't hold the pastel-colored creatures back. He pulled Bedevere, screaming at her to run, but the doctor stumbled instead and dropped to her knees. Gone was the over-confident woman who'd first stepped off the jumper with them.

John continued to fire on the nuttalli, but there were too many of them. He'd managed to hit one or two, in an explosion of colorful down, but the missing ranks were instantly replaced by more of their kind.

Bedevere screeched as they jumped on her, tearing at her uniform, her hair and skin. She struggled to her feet, but more of them sprang onto her, layering her as she twisted and screamed until she tripped and fell.

There was nothing Sheppard could do as his legs were swarmed by the things. He swiped at them with his gun, but their teeth and claws tore at his legs. Two jumped on his head, another latched onto his arm, forcing him to drop the P90 as he tried to shake them all off.

Frantically he tried to reach Bedevere, pulling the rabid creatures off of her even as he continued to struggle to remain on his feet. She thrashed, and started making pathetic gasping sounds. Pastel fur was soaked in blood as he flung the critters away. She stopped moving. Her cries became softer, little more than choked sobs. And then silence—only the chattering of teeth on flesh remained.

Finally, as John tore at the mob of bloody creatures, he saw flesh...or what was left of it. He stopped stunned, seeing what remained of her face. Her nose was gone and one eye dangled from its socket. Her mouth gaped and he realized her lips were missing. As he ripped away at the creatures, blood spurted from a vicious gash in her throat and the nuttalli seemed to bathe in the fountain.

One of the blood matted creatures looked up at him, uttering an eerie "SHHHHH" and shook itself, splattering Bedevere's blood.

"Colonel Sheppard!" Teyla's voice from above him seemed to shake him out of his stupor. He could do nothing for Robyn, and he swallowed, realizing he needed to move or he would suffer the same gruesome fate. A bright purple nuttalli jumped at his face and he stumbled back, swatting it away as another wave of the mutated bunnies swarmed over Bedevere, continuing their feast on her cooling flesh. Gagging, he turned away and kicked his legs free.

Running, he struggled to stay on his feet and focus on the path ahead, a faint line of pink leading uphill to...hopefully, safety. He could hear both Boris and Teyla firing above him and knew without a doubt that he couldn't fall. If he fell, it would be over. He didn't look at the mass of seething fur where Bedevere went down. He couldn't think of anything except getting to the path and away from the nuttalli.

Swatting and writhing as the downy-soft, sharp-clawed creatures crawled over him, John fought. Suddenly the earth began to tremble and the forest shook around him. He stumbled, but he kept pushing through the panicked animals. The nuttalli scattered as Sheppard recognized the earthquake.

Suddenly, he was free of the nuttalli as they fled with fear of the tremor. The path was within reach; he could feel the incline under his feet as he stumbled yet again, tripping over the scurrying nuttalli in front of him. The path seemed to lurch beneath him and his knee hit the ground, pain spiking. He hands clawed at the cool muddy path as he fought, his feet slipping on the incline that would have been his salvation. Instead, it seemed to fall away beneath him. He felt something hit his head, dizziness overcame him; darkness encroached and he knew...he wasn't going to make it.

And suddenly, he was falling.

But he didn't hit the ground.

[{O}]

Carson bounced off the tree, stunned. He shook his head, trying to clear it as his ears rang and dropped to his knees, unconsciously rolling in just the right direction as the alicorn barreled through the space he had occupied a second earlier, the breeze lifting his hair.

He jumped, all dazedness gone as the fear came crashing down inside his chest.

"Bloody hell." He scrambled to his feet, scurrying into the clearing, looking over his shoulder for any sign that the alicorn was coming at him again, and he let out a yelp as he watched the animal slide to a stop and turn. The beast lowered its head, pawed the ground once and charged.

He screamed and took off, knowing there was no way he could out run the legendary alicorn. He cursed his interest in the healing salve, damned his curiosity and, looking over his shoulder again, he tripped. And, as if things couldn't get any worse – the earth shook.

Terrified, Carson skidded through the grass, the dark green weeds tearing at his face and staining his uniform, as leaves and loose branches rained down around him. Underlying mud splashed up around him and he rolled onto his back, crabwalking backwards over the trembling earth, even as the alicorn advanced on him, also slowed by the earth's gyrations.

But not stopped.

Carson's eyes widened as the creature's head lowered. It was only a few feet away now, and the doctor's sight narrowed in on the glittering spear of a horn aimed at his chest. He knew there was no way he was going to escape, and he absently wished to hear his mother's voice one last time. He braced himself for the impact wondering just what it would feel like...

And then the top of the alicorn's head exploded.

The horn flew in one direction and Beckett instinctively raised his arms to cover his face as, a millisecond later, another blast took the rest of the animal's head. Blood and brains rained down on him as the creature collapsed to the ground. The ground had stopped shaking at almost the same time as the creature had died, as if in astonishment.

His own body trembling to compensate for the lack of earth-quaking, Carson slowly lowered his arms, opening one eye to peek at the scene. The animal's body lay still and quiet only inches from him. He could have reached out and touched the beast's leg if he wanted.

Beckett yelped as two more blasts were fired into the downed animal. This time the weapon did the damage it was designed to do, tearing and mangling the alicorn's hide, sending more blood splattering onto the doctor.

He turned his head, and blinked at the sight of Ronon striding confidently toward him, then smiled gratefully before flopping backwards in the grass, heedless of the mud. He needed to will his heart to start beating again. He closed his eyes, longing for relief when he heard Nonor suddenly screaming.

McKay.

In an instant, Carson was on his feet again, running and skidding to the center of the clearing where Nonor loomed over Rodney, nudging him onto his side with one foot. Why wasn't she helping him?

Instead, Nonor was bent double, yelling at the injured scientist as he rolled the rest of the way onto his back on his own. She wasn't yelling in anger—it was more like the carping of a bratty child.

"How could you do that? Couldn't you see I had almost earned the alicorn's trust? I was so close, and you destroyed everything!" She let out a sob, straightening up and covering her face with her hands. "And now I'll never know if the Alicorn would have accepted me! Because of you, it's dead! I hate you!"

Carson's eyebrows shot up in shock. What the hell...?

Her toned arms suddenly flailed up and away, nearly knocking the doctor down as he came up behind her. "It's all wrecked now!" she whimpered. "You've ruined _everything! _You're nothing but a coward!_"_

Oh, that was just too much! "What the hell are you on about?! Are you crazy?" Carson spat furiously as he dropped to his knees beside McKay. "He bloody well saved your life, lass! You should be thanking him!"

Rodney stared up at Nonor, obviously out of it. Tears rolled from the corner of his eyes as he blinked slowly, the blue eyes shifting only vaguely to look at Carson. Beckett hissed in concern, certain his friend was already in shock. The alicorn had torn McKay's shoulder open to the bone. There was blood everywhere. Oh God, Rodney.

Putting aside his emotions, surgical procedures raced through Carson's mind as he pulled at his vest, searching for a field dressing or anything to stop the bleeding. Behind him, he could hear Nonor berating Ronon for killing the legendary creature, blaming McKay for overreacting and jumping to the conclusion she was in danger.

Rodney hissed and squirmed beneath his hands when Beckett peeled back some of the fabric of his jacket to better expose the wound. "Yer going to be okay, Rodney," he assured, glancing down as McKay quietly closed his eyes. "Damn it."

"What?" Ronon stepped closer, obviously conflicted between his concern for McKay and the things his sister was insisting he hear.

"We need to get him to Atlantis. I can do nothing for him here." Carson pressed a dressing against the wound, putting his strength into it to try and stop the bleeding, and shook his head when McKay didn't react. "He's passed out again."

"I got him." Ronon knelt beside Carson.

"But he's the one who..." Nonor started, but a deadly look from Ronon stopped her. She closed her mouth, then grimaced, frowning at the oblivious Rodney as if he were to blame for the censure she had just received as well. The tears running down her face seemed to increase in frequency.

Ronon holstered his weapon and gently eased McKay's limp body up with Beckett's help, then over his shoulder.

"You okay there?" Carson kept a steadying hand on Rodney as Ronon stood, the Satedan staggering a touch under the weight.

"I got him. Let's go." Without waiting for their agreement, Dex spun around and took off at a fast pace out of the clearing.

Nonor took a moment to look back at the fallen alicorn, tears running down her face. Then abruptly she turned, glared at Carson, and hurried after her brother.

Beckett started to follow but turned and jogged back to the grotesque remains of the nasty beast. He swiped a hand at his face, doing what he could to remove the bloody alicorn spatter from his face as his gaze roved over the gore. Finally, he saw what he was searching for. Quickly, he reached down and scooped up the impressively sharp horn. It was cold to the touch and still stained with Red's blood. Carson tightened his grip and ran after the others.

[{O}]

A/N: Okay... okay...so I also spent a few days trapped in the Venus Flytraps. Curse you, Carnivorous Plants!

A/N: Tell me how much you missed me! Shower me with reviews of great praise while I soothe my poor rattled Julie.


	16. 16:The Horrors

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER SIXTEEN: THE HORRORS**

A/N: So, I am now back to posting daily. You should commend me. I have spent this morning milking, feeding and brushing my lovely Julie, and then taking her down to the big field. How I missed her. I had Ladon stopping by to feed and milk her, but apparently Julie would have none of that. She's very particular about who touches her teats and she doesn't trust him. She's not telling me how she had that little problem resolved and we had a bit of a tiff over it, but I have decided to forgive her. We shall spend the evening baking pies (me) and eating them (Julie). Hopefully things can get back to normal tomorrow.

[{O}]

Teyla stared in horror as the earth opened up and swallowed John Sheppard.

"Colonel!" she screamed, running back down the path and lunging toward the widening crack, her fingertips brushing the empty air where Sheppard's reaching hand had been a moment before. She threw herself belly-first on the shaking ground, arms reaching as far as she could stretch into darkness below. Debris tumbled around and over her, bouncing off the pack she still wore, bruising her legs and shoulders. She dug her fingers into the soft earth, clinging tight, still searching.

She shouted for him again, startled by how loud her voice suddenly sounded. Belatedly, she realized that the forest had gone utterly still around her. The ground tremors had ended as suddenly as they had begun. Teyla looked around frantically, but saw no sign of the predators that had been pursuing them.

"Sir?" The frightened call and another shower of dirt and pebbles announced Sergeant Boris's arrival on the scene. The two of them exchanged wild-eyed stares, than turned to stare into the gully that hadn't existed minute ago. The earthquake had split the ground like a ripe melon. A six-foot-wide crack separated them from the swampy black lowlands where they'd lost Bedevere. Sunlight barely penetrated the rift, making it impossible to tell how far Sheppard might have fallen. Boris crouched down, bellowing for his commanding officer, looking more frantic each time the call went unreturned.

Teyla shook herself out of her daze. She reached out and touched the sergeant's shoulder gently. "Keep watch," she said, shrugging out of her pack. "I will go after the colonel."

Boris sputtered a protest, which Teyla ignored. She hefted the pack, tightening it on her shoulders so it would not fall. The last thing the colonel needed was for a pack laden with survival gear to come crashing down on his head.

Turning back to Boris, she gestured toward the radio still tucked in her vest. "I will let you know as soon as I find him. In the meantime, try to contact Doctor Beckett and let him know we will need his assistance," she said. "And warn him to beware of those creatures."

"Right," Boris said miserably. "Beware the cute, fluffy animals." He sighed heavily, "Christ, I'm getting too old for this shit."

Teyla glanced at him, trying to gauge his age. He appeared to be in his forties, but the lines around his mouth were so deeply etched in a frown that he might appear older.

He saw her watching, then shrugged, "Forty-five," he answered her unasked question. "I'm actually supposed to be retiring next week. The colonel thought I might like to see one last amazing thing before I left." He looked down into the rift, "Not so amazing, really, is it?"

She shook her head, then tried to smile reassuringly, reaching out to touch his arm lightly. "He will be all right. We will all be all right – we just need to hold on and not give up hope."

Boris gnawed his bottom lip for a moment, staring at the dark, jagged trench, then nodded reluctantly. He moved back a few steps and hefted his weapon, eyeing the treetops warily. Teyla gave him a grateful smile, lowered herself to the edge of the crevasse, and began her cautious descent, mindful of the very unstable ground.

[{O}]

"Beware the _what_?" Beckett snapped, pressing one hand to his radio earpiece. "Wee bunnies, you say?"

The battered but ambulatory survivors of the great alicorn hunt were limping through the sun-dappled forest, retracing their path downwards to the jumper. On the distant horizon, trees swayed in the final aftershock of the earthquake, but the temblor had barely slowed them - their one and only lucky break of the day.

Beckett kept a steadying hand on McKay's back, trying to keep the unconscious man from being jostled too much as he dangled over Ronon's shoulder. McKay's breath hitched painfully in time with the Satedan's footsteps, but he didn't stir.

The radio squawked again as Boris repeated his ridiculous message about the rabbits. Beckett turned away, distracted by a sudden movement in the underbrush.

He froze, staring, as one of the pastel bunny-creatures peeked out at him through a clump of wildflowers. Its cute button nose wrinkled, exposing a mouthful of long...white... Wait a minute. Were bunnies supposed to have saw teeth like a piranha?

The bunny raised a dainty pink paw to its muzzle, sharp teeth bearing in a shark-like smile beneath its whiskers and candyfloss fur.

"Shhhh!" it hissed.

"Oh God," Beckett whispered, pawing at his sidearm, trying to un-holster his pistol without dropping the severed horn he still carried.

A bright red energy bolt slammed into the hillock where the creature was sheltering, reducing the wildflowers to a heap of charred ash. Dex cursed, trying to readjust his aim without dropping McKay. The creature's fuzzy white tail flashed once as it vanished, hissing, into the underbrush. Dex's next round missed the bunny by a hair, incinerating a tree stump instead.

Nonor whirled on her brother and punched him viciously on the arm. "Would you stop shooting every magical creature we meet?" she snapped.

Beckett and Dex ignored her, trying to listen to Boris's panicked report.

"_Robyn – Kat - Doctor Bedevere! She's dead! Those...those things chewed off her face - ripped her throat out_!" Boris's voice had climbed an octave with shock.

"Easy now," Beckett said, his own voice coming out as a frightened squeak. He cleared his throat and tried again. This time, he hit the calm, reassuring bedside tone he was aiming for. "Calm down, lad. Tell us about Colonel Sheppard." He swept a hand at his sleeves, trying to rid himself of some of the alicorn viscera that had landed on him.

As Boris choked out account of ferocious rabbits and earthquakes and cliffsides that swallowed men alive, Beckett ran through a mental triage. First, they needed to get back to the jumper. He was the only one in the group still in any condition to fly the thing. If he could make it to the jumper, he could stabilize Rodney, then head to the hillside to help with the rescue effort. The jumper had a well-stocked first aid kit, a backboard, climbing equipment; everything they'd need to mount a proper rescue.

He picked up the pace, still mouthing reassuring phrases into the radio. He recognized a rock formation that marked the edge of the plateau where they'd parked the jumper. Nonor flounced ahead of him.

Almost there. He trudged ahead, trying not to think about how on earth he was supposed to fly the jumper in a straight enough line to find the colonel.

[{O}]

It took a long moment for Sheppard to come around. He lay half on his side, one arm flung up over his head. He was discombobulated, sore. He squeezed his eyes shut and tried to figure out what the hell had happened.

His head buzzed maddeningly, and all over him little hurts blossomed. With a groan, he blinked and tried to roll over, but pain struck and the loose-earth shifted beneath him. Painfully, he tumbled, rolling over onto his belly as dirt cascaded around him. The downward journey stopped and he rested for a moment. Dirt clods continued to dribble down on him - annoyingly. He coughed and tried to sit up.

Ow! Oh God… Crap! He remained still, thinking that he could put up with the dirt bits. No need to move just yet. Yet more stuff continued to come down, and he had to get out of the way.

Stoically, he pushed himself upright with one hand. OW! That hurt. What the hell…?

He blinked into blackness and tried to figure out it out. What happened? Everything was so … black. He breathed in the rich smell of soil. Beneath his fingers - dirt. He had little else to go on.

From somewhere above and behind him, a little light eked in. Otherwise the space was dark. There was enough light to send a glow through the area, but he couldn't really see anything. He was underground – in the dark – and hurt.

Ow! Crap. Oh God.

His arm - yeah, that hurt a lot. He felt cut - bitten maybe - bruised from head to foot, and every attempt at movement sent new agony coursing through him.

Okay, Sheppard, get a handle on this. What the hell happened? Think? Strangely enough, the only image that came to him was something akin to Easter Bunnies.

Bunnies? Fuzzy colorful bunnies - hippity-hoppiting down the bunny trail - floppy ears - little noses wiggling as they leaped - mercilessly - onto him and the others - to tear off hunks of flesh and -

Oh God!

It all came clear - the planet of the alicorn - the horrible rabbit-beasts - Bedevere! He jerked upright, feeling pain jar his side. An almost-electrical shock jolted through one arm. He tugged the arm close, cradling it to his chest, trying to ease the nauseating pain. He breathed through his teeth, forcing his respiration to a slower rate, until he was sure he wasn't going to vomit.

Okay, good. Better. He experimented with moving his fingers, but found that was a bad idea. Something was broken. No doubts there.

He'd fallen. He'd fallen into a crevasse or a hole of some sort. If any of those damn rabbits showed up with a pocket watch, he'd be ready for the really good drugs.

But the others - where were they?

Clasping his hurt arm tightly to himself, Sheppard sat up and called, "Teyla? Boris?" Only silence returned – the earth muffling any echo. He listened intently, hearing nothing. Not a sound from the others. Damn! And it was pretty damn dark.

He felt about, hoping for his P90 and its flashlight, but knowing he'd dropped it as he'd fought to free Bedevere from the hoards of candy-colored puffballs intent on ripping her face to shreds.

He grimaced, realizing his failure. "Damn," he said under his breath. Should have protected her, he told himself. No one should have to go like that. Damned sorry. But there was nothing he could do for her now. He had to deal with saving those that were still with him. He glanced upward toward the only light that came in to him.

"Teyla," he called again. "Boris?" He stilled, listening – and nothing. "Great," he muttered. "Just great."

His 'good' arm stung as he moved it upward to feel his ear, trying to find his radio. It was - unsurprisingly - missing. He continued searching his person for anything that would help his situation. He should have had glowsticks in one pocket, but he found that the Velcro flap was open and he'd probably lost the contents in his fall. Still, there had to be something -

Finally his hand brushed against the Life Sign Detector in one pocket, and he pulled it free. Cool! Yeah, that'd work. He concentrated and the thing blipped into operation. With a grin, he held it out, letting the screen illuminate his situation.

He was underground - no surprise there. He moved the device around, finding that it was a tunnel of some sort - strangely uniform in size, stretching out beyond the reach of the meager light. Behind him was a mound of dirt, beneath an opening in the ceiling where a little light bled through. The ceiling was strangely out of alignment, and he realized that this was the crevasse he'd fallen into - and it was mostly sealed again.

He winced as he twisted the Life Sign Detector about to get a look at his injuries. Blood spotted his arms where the fluffy vermin had bit through to flesh, but the bleeding had apparently stopped. His cuffs were smeared with red - Bedevere's probably - either that or the creatures'. The things seemed to have concentrated mainly on attacking his arms and legs - probably trying to immobilize him before it went for the more vulnerable face and throat.

He frowned at that thought and angled the light upward – to the hole above his head. If that was how he got in here – then it was his best bet at getting out once again. Slowly, painfully, he scooted himself up the mound of dirt. The illumination was a bit brighter from that vantage point, but even so, there seemed to be no direct light getting through. Above, little filaments of light dotted the ceiling – roots maybe? Or maybe glowworms – giving out a little illumination, not enough to see by, but enough to delineate the broken roof that ran above him.

"Teyla?" he shouted. "Boris?" And still there was no response. Where were they? Hell…where was anyone?

**TBC**

A/N: I hope you enjoyed the latest chapter! Things are not getting any better, by the way. Just thought I'd let you know. Ha ha ha ha!

A/N: Okay, okay, so I read my reviews. Yes Ma, I'll come to the spring festival. I don't know why I have to spend the night at your place though. It would be just as easy for me to stay here in my comfy bunker! So sorry, Julie. I promise you, my darling cowwww! I promise I'll be back tomorrow and we will bake pie! Can you do something about the lizard while I'm gone? Seriously, I know he's still in there somewhere. Sic 'im!


	17. 17:The Lost

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER SEVENTEEN: THE LOST**

A/N: Okay, I am back from the Spring Festival. I made a Nuttalli cake. Everyone seemed pleased. Julie brought ice cream that she had made herself. People weren't too happy with it but I made them eat it anyway. We had to sit at the kiddy table because we came late. How I loathe the kiddy table. The children do not show me the respect I deserve! I am KOLYAAAA! It's hard to fear me when I am sitting at a little card table in the kitchen with five-year-olds.

[{O}]

Dex kept his same steady pace, scanning the terrain for any other signs of wildlife. The flower-strewn ground, the feather-leaf trees, everything around them had taken on an air of menace. The Satedan tightened his grip on McKay, wishing he didn't have to carry the injured man like a sack of grain.

He'd spent his childhood daydreaming about this place. Were none of the old legends true? Was everything that was supposed to be good and pure in his people's mythology nothing but a twisted lie? Dex's gaze strayed to the bloodied horn the doctor still clutched like a weapon. The alicorn was supposed to be able to weigh a man's soul in the balance and judge his worth. The creature had killed Jerkin, then had savaged McKay, and had been about to do the same to Beckett. He'd known little of Jerkin, but he knew, _knew_, that neither Beckett nor McKay was unworthy. He hadn't known either man long, but he trusted his instincts, and his instincts had found the honor in both.

But, then again…

He glanced at Nonor. She had finally stopped crying, her bottom lip firmly pushed out in a terrific sulk.

He knew she believed that McKay had somehow stopped her from making a connection with the alicorn, but he just couldn't see it. McKay had probably thought he was saving her life. Beckett certainly seemed to think so. He wished he had been there to see exactly what had happened, but he'd only shown up in time to see Beckett run into that tree.

He snorted, trying not to find the image amusing. But, well…

"By the way," Beckett said suddenly, stepping up so Ronon could see him. "I wanted to…to thank you. For saving my life, I mean."

Ronon grimaced, never comfortable with this sort of thing. "Yeah, well, you would've done the same for me." He had said it without thinking, and realized it was true.

"Sure, but I wouldn't 'ave figured out that shooting off its horn would leave it vulnerable."

"Figured the horn was what was making it heal so fast." He wanted to shrug, but the weight on his shoulder was too heavy, so he just grimaced again. "Then figured, if I took it off, I could kill it."

"Yeah, well, you obviously figured rightly." Beckett smiled up at him, "And I'm truly grateful. So, thank you. Saved all our lives. Colonel Sheppard was right about you - we're blessed to have you standing with us, Ronon Dex."

Ronon just grunted in reply, hoping Beckett would think the flush in his cheeks was from exertion. A glance at the physician's pleased smile as he fell back to check on Rodney again, though, told him he probably hadn't succeeded.

And he also knew that, yes, Satedan mythology was nothing more than that – a bunch of myths. Fact was, the real thing was brutal – as reality always was in this galaxy. But that didn't mean there wasn't goodness and purity in the universe – _that_ he had found in the men with him now, and in many others he had met over the years. It was in the hearts of real heroes like Beckett, Sheppard, Teyla and McKay - not in the creatures of a warped fable.

And it made him even more resolved to save the man hanging over his shoulder, and the rest of his team on this planet. He wouldn't give up until he had gotten them all home.

_Home._

Involuntarily, he smiled.

Ahead, the forest lightened and thinned, showing they were nearing their destination. Still leading the way, Nonor reached the clearing and stopped, staring at something. Beckett jogged forward until he was beside her, with Dex just behind.

"Where's the jumper?" Ronon asked, frowning in confusion.

There was a lot more earthquake damage down here. Huge trees had come crashing down, as had a large section of the plateau to their left, in the direction he knew Sheppard and the others had set off. The jumper was simply gone.

Beckett jogged forward toward where the jumper once stood. There was nothing – nothing but blackness – a hole in the ground. "Oh God, no," he moaned, coming to a halt at the yawning pit.

"What?" Nonor asked, still not getting it.

"This is the spot," he moaned. "This is where we parked it. The jumper's down there," he pointed into the darkness, "somewhere..." Timidly, he edged forward until he could peer within. "Good God," he murmured, keeping a good two feet from the very edge. He squinted, focusing on something beneath a covering of dirt, showing white in the pretty half-swallowed sunlight.

Nonor, heedless of the danger, charged forward until she stood on the verge of the pit, the toes of her boots pointing out over the abyss. Inquisitively, she peered down, catching the same glint of something in the blackness. "Why would someone have put something so far down in the ground?" she asked, head tilted charmingly. Her voice echoed and she smiled, delighted to her own voice returned to her. "Do you see something glittering down there?"

"Aye, lass," Beckett spoke, his voice awed as he leaned, keeping his center of gravity well over solid ground. "That's what I'm trying to tell you. That...that's our jumper." Somewhere below, water dripped, sounding far off and lonely. "I think that's the windshield we can see all the way down there...maybe." He glanced at her, "You shouldn't get that close. The ground is unstable. It could crumble."

She just smiled back at him, shaking her head, "Oh no. Nothing here will harm me," she assured him, then the smile fell as she regarded him darkly. "I am not the unworthy one." At that, Beckett grimaced, but didn't reply.

"How far down is it?" Dex asked from some distance away. With McKay on his shoulder, he wasn't about to get too near that hole. He shifted a little, adjusting his balance as he pondered how he'd manage to climb with the injured man. He didn't like the way the scientist was breathing, and McKay was feeling terribly hot against his shoulder.

"Long way," Beckett said, gazing at Nonor's reckless stance. A stone, loosened from her proximity to the edge, toppled. Carson sucked in his breath, watching its long decent until it obviously collided with a quiet metallic 'thunk' on the top of the jumper. It clattered away, coming to rest, unseen, alongside the sunken craft.

Beckett waited for it to settle, listening until all that remained was the constant wet drip that filled the space. "Long way," he repeated hollowly.

The show over, Nonor sniffed. Imperially, she drew to her full height. "The very earth cries out against the murder of the gentle alicorn," she said, flinging out her arms dramatically as she strode toward her brother. She smiled smugly - apparently forgetting that the jumper was her ride off this benighted planet, too. "See what happens to those that dare harm the serene and wise alicorn?"

Ronon just lowered his head to glare at her – he had finally had enough. "If killing the alicorn caused this, Non, then I guess it's a good thing I didn't hit that pink rodent back there. What do think that'd bring down on us? An asteroid shower?"

Nonor looked surprised, then angry, opening her mouth to reply…when she suddenly froze, staring at his arm. Dex glanced down, startled to see his arm sheeted in red. McKay's blood was trickling down his sleeve in slow rivulets, tickling his wrist, dripping from his fingertips to stain the wildflowers.

"Damn," Ronon muttered, backing further from the hole and moving to the far side of the clearing, in the direction of the lake, hoping it to be more stable.

"Beckett!" Ronon called, sinking down on one knee and rolling McKay gently onto the turquoise-colored earth, mindful of the scientist's cracked ribs. McKay's eyes fluttered open at the change in position, blinking up at him in pained confusion. His face was sweat-slicked, pale and bloodless. Dex shrugged out of his long coat and draped it over his injured teammate as McKay closed his eyes again and began to shiver. Absentmindedly, Ronon rubbed at his blood-coated arm, trying to free himself from the uncomfortable sensation.

Beckett was suddenly there, throwing himself down beside Rodney.

Muttering to himself in an accent so thick the two Satedans couldn't begin to make out the words, Beckett pulled back Ronon's coat and peeled away the bandage to get a better look at the shoulder wound. It shouldn't be bleeding this badly, this long. The wound didn't seem to be clotting at all and the flesh around it was already turning an angry, inflamed red.

Beckett studied the putrefying wound for a long moment, and then touched his radio.

"Boris?" he called. "We have a problem." He sighed and brushed McKay's sweat-soaked hair back from his forehead. "Two problems, actually."

There was silence on the other end of the radio.

"Boris?" he tried again.

The radio crackled to life with a hideous burst of noise.

[{O}]

Gunshots and human screams rang out over her head, startling Teyla so badly she almost lost her grip on the slippery earthen wall of the hole. She clawed for purchase, feeling nails rip and skin shred as she fought to save herself. The trench was deeper than she would have believed, and only the fact that it was angling into a slope, rather than a dead drop, gave her hope that she might find Colonel Sheppard in one piece at the bottom of it.

"Boris!" she cried, blinking up into the small square of sunlight high above. The sergeant's frightened cries continued, punctuated by automatic weapons fire.

Teyla started climbing, scrabbling for purchase on the sliding earth and loose scree of the steep slope.

Abruptly, the terrible noises above ended. Teyla froze, arms and legs locked, one cheek pressed into the cool, damp earthen wall.

"Sergeant Boris?" she called softly.

A shadow appeared on the edge of the drop-off, dark and indistinct against the sunlight. A small shower of dirt and pebbles pattered down on Teyla's upturned face.

Teyla coughed, blinking to clear her vision. Her legs and arms were starting to tremble from the effort of holding herself up.

"Sergeant?" she called again.

The shadowy figure shifted, crouching closer to peer down at her.

"SHHHHH!" the monster hissed. There was blood on its whiskers.

Their gazes locked for a long moment.

Then the nuttali pounced.

Teyla shrieked, flinching back reflexively, losing her grip.

And then they were both falling.

[{O}]

Beckett's hand dropped from his radio, cutting off the hissing, chittering, gnawing noises that had filled the transmission since Boris's final pain-filled scream.

He turned wide, frightened eyes on Nonor. "What else aren't you telling us about this planet?" he gasped. "What else is waiting out there to kill us?"

McKay stirred and groaned as Beckett tightened fresh bindings around his shoulder. His blood was spotting the new bandage already. Beckett crooned to him, soft reassuring nonsense, while he waited for Nonor to answer the question. Dex hovered nearby, watching his sister through narrowed eyes.

Nonor collapsed in a dejected heap. "You don't understand!" she whined.

"What don't I understand?"

Nonor ignored him and turned to Ronon in appeal. "They won't hurt us, brother! Only those who are unworthy are attacked!"

Ronon shook his head as if to clear it. "Just answer the question, Nonor," he growled.

She sniffed. "The legends say the nuttalli are the mischievous little creatures who dance in dew circles. They didn't say anything about eating people's faces!" Her voice climbed to an aggrieved wail.

Dex loomed over his snuffling sister. "What _else_ do the legends tell us?" he prompted.

Nonor gnawed her lower lip, frowning. "Well..." Her eyes looked upwards. "Reportedly, the skies above Ctesias are patrolled by great flying beasts, ever ready to swoop down upon evildoers with their razor beaks and claws. They are so imposing that no race has ever dared name them."

"Oh, fabulous." Carson hunched his shoulders, willing himself not to look up to scan the bright, cloudless sky.

"And then there are the feathered serpents...trees that uproot themselves and walk by moonlight..." Nonor was warming to her topic now. "Toads the size of haystacks...molemen..."

"Molemen," Beckett whimpered, looking down at the ground below him. Moles were supposed to be amazing diggers – what if it wasn't the earthquake that had taken the jumper…or Colonel Sheppard for that matter? He shivered, wondering if they could be safe anywhere on this planet. At that moment, McKay jerked and mumbled something, and Beckett rested a light hand on his forehead in a soothing gesture. His skin was furnace-hot under Carson's touch.

Dex crossed his arms, hoping the others couldn't see his skin crawl, and looked to Beckett. "Yeah, Molemen. The old stories say a race of monsters live beneath the earth here."

"Molemen!" Nonor interrupted brightly, regaining some of her old spark now that the conversation had turned back to the comfortable realm of legends and children's stories. "Ghastly creatures that sprout in shadows like mushrooms! They shamble instead of walk. They blindly grope because their eyes have been eaten up in darkness. Flesh eaters! Mortal enemies of the righteous alicorn!"

Carson wondered whether it was a good thing or a bad thing that there were creatures on this planet tough enough to tackle an alicorn. Shaking his head, he turned back to Rodney, tuning out the rest of Nonor's excited recitation. He had enough to worry about with the monsters they'd met thus far.

His mental triage list was getting longer by the minute. They needed to get Rodney someplace safe, someplace where he could try to clean and tend his wounds. Below them, the jumper was gone, lost inside a sinkhole, with no obvious way to get to it. Boris was most likely dead, poor Bedevere, too, and Jerkin certainly so.

And somewhere in this fractured fairy tale of a planet, Sheppard and Teyla were still missing.

[{O}]

Sheppard's eyes fluttered open – he was lying on the slope of dirt. He must have dozed off for a moment. Still feeling very disoriented, he decided that maybe trying to get up would be a good idea. Get up…and move. Somewhere. Else. But what if there were other creatures down here? Ones that made the nuttali seem tame? Creatures just waiting to creep up on him in the dark…

And then he chuckled slightly at his ridiculousness and turned the life signs detector about so that he could actually look at the screen and use it correctly. He frowned at what was revealed. Dots – nuttalli, he decided. The device was displaying the creatures although the things were on the surface. And his expression darkened as he thought about Teyla and Boris – still up there – with the death-balls of fuzz.

He scrambled up to his knees, grimacing at the little pains that went through him, and reached for the hole. He could probably climb back out, he decided – maybe – if he didn't have a broken arm and if he wasn't riddled through with a dozen little bite holes. He imagining himself leaking like a sieve if he were to take a drink at that moment.

Glancing to the display again, he examined the dots. Was one of them Teyla and one of them Boris? Which of the dots were the attack rabbits? How many were worms or voles or maybe glowy things under the earth?

He frowned. But there was something curious about how the dots were arranged; they seemed to be in a line, as if the creatures had queued up for something. And he slowly lowered the device, holding it out in front of himself as he stared beyond it to the dark tunnel that stretched in either direction.

The dots, he realized, lined up exactly with the tunnel. The life-forms weren't above him. Oh no. They were right here in the tunnel with him. He breathed slowly, listening as something quietly scrambled beyond the little halo of light.

"Hey!" he called. "Anyone out there?"

More scuttering answered him.

"Whatever you are out there," he paused, wondering what he could say to the unknown creatures. "I could take ya…" he tried.

WHUMP! Something fast and large came down on top of him, tackling him, driving him downward. Shocked, he tumbled as he grappled with the attacker. He gasped in agony as the bones in his arm ground, as the shape forced him from the pile of dirt to the floor of the tunnel. The Life Sign Detector flew from his grasp and he was plunged into darkness once more.

**TBC**

A/N: We returned to the bunker to find more evidence of lizard occupation. Sydney has not departed. I believe he has brought friends. It looks like they were having a meeting of some sort as there are several tiny folding chairs set up on my rumpus room. I shall rid the bunker of lizards one way or another!


	18. 18:The Recipe

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER EIGHTEEN: THE RECIPE**

A/N: Okay, so I was away for one night - ONE NIGHT (after being gone for a week) and the lizard problem has gotten much worse. They're everywhere. I'm not sure which one is Sydney, but believe he's brought plenty of his friends into the bunker. They make me sick, but I rather enjoy their scaly skin when they run across my back.

[{O}]

Sheppard let out a shout as he used every ounce of strength he contained to stay conscious as they rolled. This attacker was much bigger than the nuttalli, and (for the most part) not as soft. It was only the somewhat familiar shout that kept him from trying again to fight with his attacker when it moved again.

"Teyla?" he called, grasping hold of a bare arm in the darkness.

"Get it off!" Teyla pleaded.

"What? Where?"

Light flared as Teyla activated a glowstick, waving it about wildly in an attempt to free herself of the last fluffy-puffies that savagely clung to her face. Little streams of blood trickled down her chin.

Feeling sick at the sight, Sheppard reached, ready to dislodge the beast with the least amount of damage, when the creature let loose on its own. With an unnerving "SHHHHHHH," it jumped away, clinging momentarily to the earthen ceiling of the tunnel. Its eyes were wide and terrified, glowing in the greenish light. It turned, scuttling away through the hole in the ceiling, hissing like water flung on a fire - the sound growing softer as it disappeared up the hole.

And for a moment, the two sat, side-by-side, panting in the glow, waiting for another assault. But all was still.

"Are you all right, colonel?" Teyla asked evenly.

"Yeah. You?"

Still trying to calm her breath, Teyla responded, "I am well." She tenderly touched the side of her face, feeling the bleeding wound. She grimaced, exploring the damage.

"It's not bad," Sheppard tried to assure her, pulling a bandage from his pocket.

Teyla looked grateful for that small offer as she opened the packet and pressed the gauze to her face.

"Boris?" Sheppard asked.

Teyla tilted her head up, looking up to the chimney that sprouted to the surface. She kept the bandage to her cheek as she held out the glow stick with the other. "I believe he… I heard him …" and she was silent for a moment before she was able to complete her thought. "I think that the creatures attacked him."

And they were silent again. Something caught Sheppard's attention and he leaned stiffly to retrieve the dropped Life Sign Detector. It flared to life again as he touched it.

Still holding her face, Teyla's eyes glanced to the screen on the LSD. "There are others," she said, hushed and anxious.

"Yeah," Sheppard responded, regarding the display with an annoyed expression. "Seems that they're down here. We got company."

Teyla, in one quick movement, brought the glowstick back and flung it into the tunnel. It landed even as she pulled a fresh stick from her vest pocket.

Sheppard looked out in disbelief. For a second, creatures were illuminated – squat, creatures with what appeared to be a layer of short brown hair, little more than fuzz against skin. They had big heads, small flaps for ears, wide shovel-like hands, stub legs ending in clawed feet – and their eyes were huge and strangely teardrop shaped, like those horrendous figurines that were sold in knickknack shops.

The creatures grunted unhappily and disappeared from the greenish light – going deeper into the tunnel – into the blackness.

"Colonel," Teyla whispered. "Did you see… creatures?"

With a groan, Sheppard rubbed his forehead and uttered a miserable, "Crap!"

[{O}]

McKay coughed, painfully, and shivered. He felt like he was stuck in a deep, dark hole - one he needed desperately to climb out of. Voices filtered down to him from above, and he tried to focus on them, to get closer to the light they inhabited. One arm reached out, trying to grasp hold of something. The other arm did not move at all – it was as if the limb were already dead at his side. "Got to…" he started to say. He paused to lick his lips and build his strength. "I have to…" he tried again.

"Rodney," Beckett spoke softly to the injured scientist, grasping the hand that moved in vain. "You've got to be quiet now."

McKay sucked in a breath as his fingers wrapped around Beckett's hand with a feeble grip. He said nothing, simply holding on. The world finally opened up around him, and he blinked up at blue sky and the faces of his teammates. He was lying on his back, and incredibly hot. His breathing came in ragged gasps, and he found it hard to keep anything in focus.

"Everyone okay?" he asked softly, glancing languidly to Ronon and Nonor.

"We're fine," Ronon stated emphatically as he stood above them. He hoped that McKay had forgotten what had happened to Jerkin, and hadn't heard the news of Bedevere or the horrible end of Boris. He moved closer, protectively. He didn't look down at his teammate, but rather searched the surrounding area for the horrible creatures of his childhood fantasies. "We're fine," he repeated.

"Good, good," McKay whispered. "Because, me… not so good. In case… in case you didn't…" and his voice trailed off as he sucked in a breath and he attempted to rock to one side. Oh God, it hurt!

"Yes, yes," Beckett responded, digging one-handedly through his pack as he gently pressed McKay back into position with his other. "I can see that, clearly. Just stay still."

"Stay still? You think?" McKay's voice was soft and incredulous. "I was thinkin'… maybe… me and Ronon could go… for a hike or something." He squeezed his eyes shut. "Mountain climbing… spelunking perhaps." His voice trailed off as he fought for breath.

"Hush, lad," Beckett ordered softly. "Save your energy."

The physicist blinked at him, obviously not about to obey that order, then a curious look tinged his blue eyes. "What..?" he asked softly. "What do you have all over you, Carson?"

Beckett looked perplexed for a moment, before he glanced at his bloodied uniform. "Alicorn," he stated briefly.

"Oh," was all Rodney could say in return, then smiled weakly. "Good."

Nonor flitted about, looking anxiously into the trees as well, but as Beckett glanced her way, he realized that, unlike her brother, she wasn't searching for targets that needed destroying – rather she was looking for little fantasy friends. Ronon would have a hell of a time if anything attacked them – first to protect, but also to keep Nonor from running off and trying to caress the creatures.

The doctor looked down to Rodney, whose frail grip was fading, and he gasped open mouthed as Beckett released his hand. He pulled back the coat that Ronon had draped over the scientist and started checking the bandage again. The white material was soaking up blood, too much still leaking from the wound.

McKay's face contorted and he sucked in a breath, his body shaking. "God! Oh God…"

"Rodney, you're gonna need to hang on for just a bit, okay?" Beckett said, hoping it didn't sound as much like a plea as he knew it was. "You're gonna be fine." But as he spoke the words, the doctor looked anywhere but into McKay's eyes. "Just fine."

"Carson," McKay got out, wincing as if the very act of breathing was hurting him. "You're a worse liar than I am." His voice faded to nothing as he continued to struggle.

"Nah," Beckett said softly, "No one is quite that bad."

McKay's gaze continued to wander, first to Ronon who gazed at their surroundings. When he glanced to Nonor, the woman gave him a perplexing look and then stepped away, her arms wrapped around herself.

He glanced in the direction where they'd left the jumper. Confusion sparked across his features. "Where's…?" he started as another tremble passed through him. He licked his lips and completed, "…the jumper? What've you done with it?"

"See, we've run into a bit of a snag," Beckett said, trying not to sound alarmed. "Jumper's out of commission for a while."

"Commission…" McKay repeated, slurring the word.

"Aye," Beckett answered, taking Rodney's pulse again as his gaze flitting up to take in the empty space that once held their means of escape. "Just stay quiet a bit and we'll figure it out."

"Figure it out?" McKay's eyes becoming more unfocused. "Give me some of the facts. I'll try to…to…" But his voice failed him and he stared off into nothing. He stiffened as another pain shot through him. Whimpering softly, he let his eyes close.

Beckett remained still as Rodney breathed in hitches and Ronon stood guard over them. Nonor paced. Beckett looked helplessly at their meager supplies.

Carson laid a hand briefly on Rodney's chest, feeling too much heat through the fabric of the torn shirt. The physicist seemed out of it again. "He shouldn't be this bad," Beckett said softly. "I've never seen a fever come so quickly and I can't get the bleeding to stop." He shook his head woefully. "How could this have happened?"

"The alicorn judges those that it confronts," Nonor said, though she sounded slightly less confident than before. "Those that are worthy are given great gifts. Those that are not worthy are tossed aside."

"Tossed aside?" Beckett echoed incredulously.

Nonor nodded earnestly. "As we all saw for our own eyes," she confirmed. "He obviously received the fate owed to him."

"He'd done nothing to deserve this," Beckett snapped, laying a hand softly on Rodney's immobile arm. "What? You think that just because he's not a 'warrior', and he doesn't go off killing things, that he deserves to be killed instead?"

Nonor sniffed delicately. "The alicorn has higher standards than most. It can see right to the heart of a man." She smiled, her arms still tightly wrapped around herself. "The alicorn favors those that are pure of heart and sure of the nobility of their deeds. The uncertain, those that doubt their own actions, are what that the alicorn despises. The alicorn weeds out what is unpleasant and improves the next generation with his blessings."

Beckett felt his face grow hot with these words, and almost jumped to his feet to confront her, but Ronon cut him off.

"Nonor!" the big Satedan growled, the snap in his voice bringing a surprised expression to his sister.

"The alicorn judges a true warrior and lauds him," she insisted. "Its judgment against the self-important and dishonorable is known to be quick and severe."

Rodney shifted, his face tight with pain, and let out an unintelligible murmur. Beckett gave up on any idea of confronting the deluded Nonor, staying crouched over Rodney, trying to comfort his friend.

"It is for the best," Nonor continued, her voice plaintive. "Everyone knows this. Ronon, you sang songs in your youth praising the alicorn's wise deeds. Its pronouncements are beyond reproach."

"Enough!" Ronon snarled.

"I'm only repeating the truth! You know this, dear brother," she simpered. "You were raised on this knowledge. It flows in our blood."

"They were just stories!"

"Stories that hold everything we believe in." Nonor moved around him, trying to meet her brother's eye, but he continued to scan the fluffy-tuft landscape, ever on the alert.

With a pout, Nonor went on. "Remember when you were young and still wearing a little gertergauld? You told me that you wished to someday bow down before the alicorn, to have it place its head on your lap. It was your greatest dream!"

"I was a child."

"When you went away to join the fighters, you said that it was to make yourself worthy." She blinked her adorable large eyes becomingly. "We all knew it was to attain your dream. Do you turn your back on everything that you once believed to be true?"

Ronon spun toward her. "I grew up!" he spat out. "I have learned the value of my friends. That creature is a horrible beast!"

"But it's the alicorn!" she countered, as if that word alone would solve everything. "It knows…"

"It is a vile creature that kills without remorse! It is a thoughtless destroyer"

The declaration stunned Nonor. Hands clutched at her throat as tiny pearl-like tears formed in her eyes. Her mouth drew up into a delicate bow as she pouted. "Oh, Ronnie," she whimpered, ducking her head as if stuck. "Oh, you have no idea how much you've hurt me!" And her shoulders heaved as she sobbed.

Beside them, Rodney let out a slow, staggering breath. His one hand clawed at the dirt as the other lay motionless at his side. His face grew even paler as Beckett removed the now sodden bandage.

"Aw…blast." Beckett pursed his lips as he replaced the dressing again. "This is just useless," he said regretfully. "I don't understand. I just…" He worked quickly, tightening the bandage and getting a little grunt of pain out of Rodney. "I just don't have the supplies. Short of cauterizing the wound, I don't know what else to do to stop the bleeding." And his forehead crinkled with worry at that proposition. Lord, he didn't want to resort to that, but the bleeding wasn't stopping. Rodney would die soon if something wasn't done.

"How much longer until Weir sends someone to check on us?" Ronon asked.

"I don't know!" Beckett snapped. "I'm not in charge!" And then he sighed, regretful. "It'll take them a day, I'd think. We're scheduled to be here for a while. And we don't know what's become of Colonel Sheppard and Teyla. Lord, I hope they're doin' okay."

"Sheppard will be fine," Ronon decided and stiffened his stance as he kept watch.

"We have to do somethin'," Beckett declared, then his gaze lit upon the severed horn that lay in the grass not far from his knee. He snapped it up, and turned his head to fix Ronon and Nonor with a knowing look. "How?" he demanded. "How do we make it?"

Nonor's eyes, still wet from her tears, opened wide in confusion. Ronon's narrowed in understanding. "The Alicorn Salve?" he confirmed.

"What do we do?" Beckett asked. "Can we make it now? With the materials we have?" He gripped the horn as if he might thrust it like a weapon. "Do you know what needs to be done?"

Ronon shook his head regretfully, while beside him, Nonor fluttered. "I know!" she declared joyfully, dancing a little. "I know!"

"Well, out with it, lass!" Beckett demanded.

"First, we need the skin of a fezzmick."

"Fezzmick?" Beckett repeated halfheartedly.

"One of those feathered snake things," Ronon informed. "Shouldn't be too hard to find one. They like to sleep under rocks. Tend to be kinda mean if the stories are right. I hear they can bite right through leather and have enough poison to kill a man in seconds." He shrugged as if this was nothing.

Beckett moved away from a stand of stones near his back.

"And the blood of a nuttalli," Nonor ticked off on her fingers.

"Won't be a problem," Ronon included.

"And I think it needs honey from the hive of the nuffnuff," Nonor added, biting her lip. "Either that or sap from the wandering trees." And she furrowed her brow in pretty contemplation.

"Shouldn't be hard," Ronon decided as he un-holstered his weapon and checked it.

"And once we gather this dog's breakfast," Becket started. "How do we combine the ingredients?" He hefted the horn uncomfortably. "We must break this down somehow."

"The horn must be carefully rendered or all its magical properties will be lost," Nonor stated. She demonstrated by pressing her palms together, making her ample breast appear even more impressive. "The pressure must be constant and severe."

"And you know the recipe?" Beckett asked.

Ronon's sister nodded, tossing her beautiful tawny mane. She slipped into storyteller mode as she sing-songed, "The mortar and pestle must be formed from the blood-marble mined from the Eknar Fissure. Water from the pure fountain of Is primes the mixture. The skin of the fezzmick lines the mortar, and for seven days and seven nights, the wisest and the oldest of the master alchemists labors at the sacred task of refining the horn of the beloved alicorn to a fine particles. Seven drops of nuttalli blood must be added seven times a day over the seven days. No more. No less. He is to be assisted by a virgin, beautiful and fair, dressed in simple linen and barefoot, and she shall wipe his brow, massage his weary limbs, and bring his sweet fruits to eat during his toil. At the end of the prescribed timeframe, the sap – or maybe the honey – is folded in to seal in the magical properties. And finally, when all is complete," she spread her arms wide as she reached the denouement. "It is to be collected into a jar with a nice tight lid and carried close to the heart of a true warrior who further endows the ointment with goodness and light." Nonor's face was flushed and she looked half-ready to faint as she ended her recitation.

"Right," Beckett said undecidedly. "Maybe I can rig up something with what we have in the jumper." He glanced to the hole where the ship had disappeared. "Seven days won't do, but I should be able to speed that up with the right equipment." He felt bleak at the idea of trying to make the salve following Nonor's recipe. It was outrageous. "Might have to do without some of the trappings is all."

Beside him, McKay spoke, his voice little more than a whisper, "What about… the virgin? You're gonna need… one of those." And a smiled played at the edges of his otherwise tight mouth. "Can't help but like… a beautiful virgin."

"You're awake?" Beckett said surprised, looking down at the scientist.

"I heard the bit with the virgin," Rodney muttered, barely audible, the smile still on his face.

Beckett couldn't help but smile back at his friend. "Don't you go thinkin' about somethin' like that right now, Rodney. You need your strength."

As a response, McKay just sighed, looking a little less pained than before – but not much. His eyes closed again.

Beckett felt hopeless as he regarded Rodney, realizing what they were up against. This was ridiculous. He knew that the fairy tale potion was impossible, improbable and imbecilic, but it was the only thing they had at the moment. He looked to Ronon. "Okay then, we just need to find this stuff and get down to the jumper. Nonor can help me with Rodney, and you can go looking for the nuffnuffs and the fezziwigs right? Does anyone have any rope?" And he paused, remembering Red.

Nonor, who'd still held the serene look from her tale, stiffened and stepped away. "I shall not go underground!" she declared hotly. "I shall not!"

"Nonor!" Ronon sharply spoke.

"I'll go with you, Ronon, to collect what is needed," Nonor insisted.

Ronon told her, "The doctor will need assistance."

Nonor's eyes narrowed. "I am NOT a virgin!" she insisted vehemently. She looked between the men, her blue eyes flashing, daring anyone to contest this idea. "I have known MANY men!"

"Nonor," Ronon tried to cut in, not caring.

But she pressed on, "And I shall not perform tasks relegated to the sick and weak, the 'non-warriors'."

"Hey!" Beckett protested, not liking her tone.

"You ran into a tree," Nonor spat, eyeing the livid bruise on the doctor's forehead. "And it wasn't even one of the walking trees!"

Beckett huffed, trying to craft a suitably stinging reply. McKay's eyes opened again, and he frowned up at him in amused bemusement. Beckett caught the look, and shrugged.

"That tree came out of nowhere," Beckett muttered to his friend, who just smiled back at him.

"Enough, Nonor!" Ronon declared, his voice severe. "Someone must stay with them."

"You then," Nonor went on with a smart look. "I would be the best choice to find everything that is needed. The creatures of this planet love me. They will come to me. All I would need to do is sit quietly and to open my mind to the oneness of this place."

Ronon watched his sister, with a sorrowful expression, thinking that that was exactly why it had to be _him_ that sought this stuff out. "I'm not asking, Nonor. You're staying here, and you will protect them."

Wildly, she turned about, as if assaulted from all sides. "How can I protect those who are unworthy? It is against everything I…and I thought you…believe in!"

Ronon nodded sharply. "Stop! You will protect them! Not another word!" he declared. "You will keep watch over them." His tone was unequivocal. "You will let nothing harm them," he stated, jabbing a finger in her direction.

"But…" Nonor started.

"Beckett doesn't have time for foolishness," Ronon told her. "He has to watch over McKay. And YOU will watch over both of them. On your honor, you will protect them."

She looked as if she wanted to counter his commandment, but Nonor only offered him a timid nod.

That seemed to be enough for Ronon and he looked to Beckett. "I will fetch the needed items, and also find us rope. I will be back soon." And with a final nod, he turned and ran into the forest, in the direction of the glade where Red's rope lay unspoiled.

Nonor stood, arms akimbo, looking cross, but staying in place as her brother had requested. "Try not to hurt any of the creatures," she called after him, sounding hopeful.

Beckett just rolled his eyes, and looked down at Rodney. The scientist's head was turned away – unconscious again. Swallowing, Beckett grabbed for his pack again. There had to be something else in here he could use…

All he knew is that he couldn't...and wouldn't...give up.

**TBC**

A/N: I'm pretty sure that Sydney is the lizard that keeps swimming in the coffee pot. I have painted him with nail polish (Julie's). I've put a giant S him so that should help me figure out who he is. He is the instigator! He brought in all of his horrid friends. And, I think there's still a cobra and a mongoose in here, living in sin in the pie safe. What should I do about them?

A/N: GIVE ME FEEDBACK. Now! NOW or I may disappear again! And only your feedback will bring me back. Think of me as Tinkerbelle and... okay... wait. You can just forget that image.

A/N: I swear to you on the Genii Handbook - the nail polish belongs to JULIE!


	19. 19:The Molemen

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER NINETEEN: THE MOLEMEN**

A/N: Okay, so I am still here. Do you know why? Your feedback. Give me more and I won't go away again.

[{O}]

Teyla and Sheppard sat side-by-side on the mound of dirt, gazing out beyond the green light. Teyla clutched another glow-stick, ready to activate it if necessary. She'd dropped her other arm to touch the weapon at her hip – the bandage remaining adhered to the awful bite on her face.

They said nothing, listening to the shuffling in the darkness just beyond the dome of green light. Sheppard strained, hearing what might have been voices whispering. Finally, he drawled out a slow, "Okay… so… you creatures out there…ah… what do you plan to do? I mean, if you can communicate…"

Sniffling and snorting commenced, and Sheppard held his arm tightly, ready to jump to his feet if he had to. Then suddenly, something lunged. Teyla drew her weapon as the thing flapped, and something was thrown over the glow-stick – snuffing out the light.

John let loose the hold he had on his arm, to still Teyla's hand. "Don't fire," he ordered, finding her in the darkness. He could almost feel her ire at being restrained. They waited.

In the black, something sighed and a voice seemed to mutter, "That's better."

But Teyla snapped her second stick and they were again bathed in a green glow. Shapes that had drawn closer, howled. Five creatures ducked, pivoting away as they hid their overly huge eyes.

One reedy cry came out of the darkness, "Aw buggar!"

Another, in a deep voice declared, "She's got another of those wretched things! I think I hate those things."

"Blast!"

The rest chorused with a round of unhappy murmurs.

From nearby, an older voice warbled, "Can't you just put it out, love? Be sensible, eh?"

Teyla continued to hold the glowing rod out in front of her, catching sight of hunched backs, as the softly furred creatures huddled together, averting their eyes and nattering unhappily.

"How rude," the one with the deep voice complained. "Bebbil asked kindly enough, but they just do as they please. Do you know who Bebbil is?"

"Tossers," one commented with a bit of a lisp. "Not at all kind."

"I'm with Dabbo. They seem very unmole-like," the reedy one whined.

"Very un-mole-like, indeed," three or four echoed. They sounded pained as they scrunched closer together in their misery.

"Douse it," Sheppard called to Teyla. She gave him a forlorn look, but tucked the glowing stick into her pocket and they were plunged again into darkness.

"Hurrah!" the reedy voice called out of the black.

"Hurrah! Hurrah!" other voices joined in.

"See, they are kind. Most unlike the horned beast and the small biting things," Bebbil commented.

"Right as usual, Bebbil," Dabbo lisped.

"Och! I don't like the little biting things!" the deep voice declared.

"Nobody does, Nobis."

"You're not going to bite us, are you?" the reedy voice inquired.

"Good question, Ally!" Nobis commended.

"Yeah! Excellent. An answer! We need an answer!"

"Ah," Sheppard started, staring hard into the blackness and seeing nothing, but he could hear the creatures shifting about anxiously. "Well...I don't plan in biting anyone. How 'bout you, Teyla."

Sounding relatively sure of herself, Teyla replied into the dark, "I have no designs on biting."

"You don't have a pointy horn do you?" Nobis called.

"Or wings – big flappy wings? You got any of those?" a feminine voice called.

"No wings. No pointy horn," Sheppard assured.

"Course they got no wings, Mang, can't you see that?"

"The bright hurt my eyes," Mang complained. "I can't see a thing."

"Hate the bright," Dabbo complained.

"How 'bout this," Sheppard tried. "We keep the bright glowy thing put away, and maybe you could help us get out of here. You'd like that wouldn't you? We'd get out. The bright thing would go away, and everyone would be happy and we'd all get back to our happy little lives, right?"

"Sounds like he's talkin' down to us. Eh, Bebbil?"

"Seems such."

"Seems like he's got a bit of an attitude, don't he?" Mang commented.

"We only ask that you allow us to leave," Teyla tried to negotiate. "We will do you no harm."

"Yeah," Ally, said shrilly, "'Cept you put a hole in the roof!"

"And dumped your big boxy thing in the grand hall," Bebbis whined.

"Another big hole," Dabbo complained. "Like we need that!"

"Let the bright in," Nobis complained. "I don't like the bright. Who do you think fixes things like this? Yeah, me and Dabbo, we have to do it _all_."

"And who do you think gets to clean that up all the dirt you dumped?" Mang added.

"Wait a minute," Sheppard held out his hands in a placating gesture, wondering if they could even see the movement. "Did you say you found a big boxy thing? Like, really long and boxy?"

"It's bigger than all of us put together," Bebbil explained. "And it come right down in the last temblor. Why'd you put it where you did? Couldn't you tell it wasn't the safest place for somethin' o'that size to be put? 'Mazing that glass window didn't break."

"They just don't think, do they?" Mang added, making a tsking sound. And a couple of voices made cooing sounds of agreement.

Sheppard furrowed his brow and turned toward Teyla in the darkness, bumping into her nose as she did the same to lean in toward him. He offered a quiet, "Ooops, sorry," before adding, "You think they're talking about the jumper?"

"Jumper?" a voice that Sheppard couldn't identify called out. "You think you can wear it?" And laughter followed.

"Is it a ship?" Teyla asked, her voice pleading, hoping that she could get a straight answer out of the group.

"What she talking about, Mang?" a voice whispered not far from them. "That thing ain't gonna sail on the lake, is it?"

"Oh," Mang said softly. "I love the lake when the bright is gone. It's so nice at night. Is it supposed to be on the lake? 'Cause if it is, it's not in the right place."

"Not right at all," Dabbo confirmed.

"Can you just show us what you found?" Sheppard asked tiredly. "Just lead us there and we'll take care of it, okay?'

"Gettin' pushy again, ain't he?" Bebbil commented. "Well, come on then. Don't have all day."

And the mole creatures started to shuffle away in the blackness. Sheppard and Teyla slowly scrambled to their feet, and stood warily for a moment in the darkness. Teyla reached out one hand, trying to find the wall of the tunnel while she kept the other hand on Sheppard's shoulder.

"What's the delay?" Dabbo asked from a short distance away.

"They're from the bright," Mang reminded. They heard her paddle up next to them, and Teyla felt a warm, large hand encompass hers. "Come on, love. Let's find your big boxy thing and put things right."

And the group shuffled off into the darkness – Teyla trusting the mushroom shaped creature to lead her, as she kept a firm grasp of Sheppard's shoulder.

**TBC**

A/N: I have trained the leathery lizards to run across my back. I get a massage and the lizards get coffee as a reward. It's all good

A/N: MORE FEEDBACK. Come on... I deserve it. You have the time. What else could you possibly be doing?


	20. 20:The Flapping Tarp

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER TWENTY: THE FLAPPING TARP**

A/N: Last night's selection was quiet and comical. A little relief for my readers. Tonight... we will return to carnage.

[{O}]

Beckett squatted beside Rodney keeping a dirt-covered hand on the scientist's bandaged shoulder. The thick quick-clot pressure bandages he had placed over the wound once again showed multifocal areas of pink, hinting at rapid saturation of the once sterile cloth. He grimaced, and pulled at Ronon's coat to cover his friend once more.

This wasn't going to work. Beckett shaded his eyes against the sharp glare of the sun.

They were going to lose Rodney here on some godforsaken planet that seemed a cross between the enchanted forest and Jurassic Park. It seemed to be the place where Bambi would probably feast on small children and pick his teeth clean with their bones.

Carson stared with some trepidation at the point in the path where Ronon's large frame had disappeared. If he and Rodney ran into trouble now, they would be on their own. The doctor let his gaze glance across the golden-haired beauty a few feet from him and then Rodney. Nonor had a perfect muscular frame that curved and dipped in all the right places and offered just enough natural soft and tender areas to accentuate her feminine figure. She was the picture of health, which attracted the doctor in him. She was beautiful, which appealed to him as a man. And the geneticist in him could find no outward physical flaws that gave him qualms about the soundness if her DNA. A cute pout wrinkled her clear features, adding to her allure.

"This is his fault you know," she muttered turning large, long-lashed, doe-brown eyes in Beckett's direction while indicating Rodney.

And Beckett sighed, disappointed. The illusion was cruelly shattered – again. He shaded his eyes with his hand, blocking the sun as he stared up at the Satedan.

Nonor was perfect, absolutely stunningly beautiful, with the sun casting a golden halo around her frame. Her beauty was unmatched – until she spoke. Suddenly, the doctor and researcher in him had an urge to run cranial imaging on her. Perhaps her brain was like the Grinch's heart: two sizes too small. Perhaps he should run an EEG and search for any type of brainwave activity.

Beckett shook his head. With that simple move, he dismissed both her foolish statement and his callous plans. His mind, however, kept coming up with diagnostic possibilities: Maybe a scanning electron microscope would have better luck finding grey matter in Nonor if he managed to get a biopsy?

He shook his head again, trying to rid himself of his uncharitable thoughts, chuckling weakly. This was Ronon's sister. Dex deserved better from his friends. Nonor wasn't a bad person. She wasn't evil or wicked. She was just – Nonor. Completely mental and unbelievably narcissistic.

"Whaa's so f'nny?" McKay breathed out, turning his head slightly. He blinked a few times, lazy slow movements that had him struggling to unroll his eyes from the back of his head.

Beckett watched as Nonor turned and took a few steps toward the surrounding forest, as if trying to distance herself from the two unworthy men. He never did claim to be a saint and Rodney surely held no aspirations for canonization.

Carson turned his attention back to Rodney and offered sly chuckle. "Just wondering what I would find if I did some brain scans on Ronon's sister."

"A wormhole," Rodney muttered. His voice was a barely articulated answer that whispered over chapped lips.

Beckett stared quizzically at the astrophysicist not understanding the answer.

McKay took a careful breath and then explained, "It takes matter in one end, breaks it down, and..." He paused to draw more air. "…then lets it escape out the other side—whole. Nothing retained." Rodney quirked a smile and let his eyes flutter closed. The effort of speaking seemed to drain him even further. The smile faded.

"Aye, you can be a daft bugger, Rodney," Carson replied chuckling, "but occasionally pretty astute."

"Only occasionally?" Rodney asked slight annoyance. Even exhausted and dying no one appreciated his efforts. He shivered.

"Aye. Ya did get chomped on by a horned beastie, now didn't ya?" Beckett stated, pulling at Ronon's coat.

"Maybe, but at least I didn't run into a tree," Rodney retaliated with a faded accusing voice. He managed to open bloodshot eyes and stare at Carson with a superior glare, even if it was muted by pain and blood loss.

"The tree ran into me," Beckett defended, as he pressed his hand against McKay's forehead. His indignation was admixed with the worry that all of Atlantis would learn of his 'run in' with nature.

"Trees don't jump out in front of people, Carson," Rodney stated with quiet confidence.

The talking was obviously eating up what little strength he had left, but Carson could tell it was also pushing the incessant pain a little further away. If he could offer McKay some comfort by arguing with him, who was he to deny him?

"They do on this godforsaken planet." Beckett itched to lift the bandage and check McKay's seeping wound again, but kept himself from doing it. It would do them no good to disturb the bandage - if the bleeding stopped, then kudos for them, better for Rodney. But the bleeding clearly wasn't stopping. Beckett eyed the slow spread of the focal points of pink as they darkened and stretched, radiating out, wicking through the bandage and slowly bridging across the areas of white to further saturate more of the cloth. He pulled at Ronon's coat until it covered the shoulder and he wouldn't have to see it any longer.

Rodney was in trouble. They needed to get help, leave this planet of insanity and get home to Atlantis.

Looking up at Beckett through hooded eyes, McKay asked quietly, "I'm going to die aren't I?"

"Aye, someday, Rodney," Beckett answered tightly, not raising his head. He stared away into the woods, avoiding eye contact with Rodney, hoping Ronon would be returning soon.

"You're a great comfort… you know that, Carson?"

"You're not going to die today, Rodney." The doctor looked back down at his patient and offered him a kind smile, hoping it would help. When he realized there was a better way to reassure the Canadian, his caring smile morphed into one that carried an air of mischief. "At least I don't think you will."

"Oh, great, fantastic," McKay paused and dragged in an elusive breath. "You...you are no help, none whatsoever," Rodney ranted for a bit letting his one good hand clench and unclench. The other was deadly still. "Shouldn't you be… shaking a rattle and wearing feathers?" He paused, his eyes blinking slowly, lethargically. "Chanting some nonsense to the… healing gods about saving my life?"

Carson chuckled pleased to see some life come back into his friend. A spark of hope flared—all was not lost. McKay was an obstinate man and wouldn't just roll over and die.

"Left my rattle at home," he replied. He frowned as a strange thought hit him. Something was wrong. He glanced back at the woods. What was it? He kept his voice casual, to not alert his patient, "No rattle at all, and used the last of the magic snake venom to heal Zelenka of his stomach bug."

Strange. He couldn't quite put his finger on it, but it was if the wind had shifted, or a storm was blowing in. Something was about to happen. Beckett looked around for Nonor as a cloud blocked the sharp afternoon rays of the sun. The sounds of a tarp flap beating rhythmically caught his attention.

There was no breeze and certainly no one had set up a tarp.

Carson pushed himself to his feet searching the forest around them. He saw nothing. Everything was deathly still. Where was Nonor? The Satedan had disappeared!

The rhythmic flapping continued and seemed to draw nearer.

"Rodney?" Beckett asked with rising concern. "Do you hear something?"

The slow steady flapping drew ominously closer.

"No," Rodney whispered and then added with slight panic, "I'm deaf! Carson, what if I'm deaf? What am I going to do?"

"Give us all chronic headaches with your yelling," Beckett answered, though Rodney's quiet voice could hardly be called a shout. He turned in circle searching the surrounding forest, trying to pinpoint the sound. He paused and then added, "You're not going deaf, Rodney; your ears just aren't working right now."

"How is that different from being deaf?" McKay squeaked trying to raise an impossibly heavy hand to his ear, and looking frustrated as Ronon's coat got in the way.

"You can hear me, can't you? Shush, man, and listen; something's not right," Beckett hushed his friend.

"What gave you that idea?" McKay closed his eyes and swallowed tentatively himself. "The killer horned beast… the deadly bunnies straight out of a Monty Python movie..." He paused and licked his chapped lips. Drawing in another slow breath, he continued in a low voice, "Or the jumper… completely swallowed up by this planet?"

The area in the small clearing grew a shade darker as if more of the sun was being blocked. Wrong… wrong… something was very wrong!

"Carson…?" Rodney's voice faded into nothing.

Beckett snapped his head around to face to the left. He heard the unmistakable sound of something overtly large crashing through the forest, heading in his and Rodney's direction.

"Oh, crap," he whispered.

The doctor's heart began to beat frantically. Something was charging at them from the forest. He swung his head left and right trying to find a place to hide, someplace to drag Rodney off to that would offer some sort of protection. They were sitting ducks out here.

Where was Nonor? Where had the Satedan Amazon disappeared to?

"Nonor!" he yelled.

The flapping sounded increasingly louder, drumming closer, causing the tiny bones in Beckett's inner ear to vibrate.

He stared fixated to the spot in the forest that seemed likely the source of the charging beast. He reached down and tucked the alicorn horn next to Rodney. Then he fumbled with releasing his 9mm from its holster, pulling it up with his right hand. Not that it would do a lot of good.

He cursed himself, knowing he would have better luck with throwing harsh language at whatever rushed them than hitting it with a bullet. Major Lorne had tried training him with the handgun and insisted that Beckett was more capable with his left hand. Colonel Sheppard had invested many hours attempting to teach him and thought Carson was less dangerous if he used his right hand. Then the Colonel and Major agreed that perhaps Lieutenant Cadman might have better luck with training the doctor in handguns. However, that too was a bust. Carson had to admit he was not terribly focused on keeping either of his hands on the gun with Laura so close and within easy touch. And she didn't seem to mind too terribly badly.

Carson switched the 9mm to his left hand.

The glade remained in the shade. How big was that cloud? Beckett was curious but refused to look, it really didn't seem all that pertinent at the moment, but it was a bit intriguing.

The crashing drew closer, the snapping of branches, the sound of jumping feet and the thud of foot falls on the unseen dirt path carried closer and closer to the two doctors.

Beckett positioned himself between Rodney and whatever charged at them from the cover of the forest. Perhaps it was one of Boris's ferocious bunny rabbits. Maybe an angry feather snake with feet? Would it still be a snake, then? Or...God...please don't let it be an alicorn...

Beckett shook his head in frustration trying to rein in his stray thoughts.

He switched the gun to his right hand.

The incessant flapping continued to beat the air. A strange pulsing breeze suddenly buffeted Carson. He worked diligently to ignore it and focus on the man-eating monster that was sure to erupt from the forest and try and dismember him and Rodney. At least the sun was no longer in his eyes. He really didn't enjoy this kind of thing - not at all.

He was a quiet man, grew up in a quiet house, had a good mum, did his chores most days, studied hard, tried to help people the best he could. His life was exciting enough in the laboratory and emergency department. He really didn't need to add life-sucking creatures or carnivorous animals to it. This really wasn't his thing!

Beckett's pulse raced. He didn't want to die on this world that seemed spawned by a macabre drug-induced hallucination. What would his mother and cousins think if they ever learned some purple wee bunnies with cute noses had killed him? Or feathered snakes that hid from the sun? He'd be the laughing stock down at the pub. His only consolation was that his death would be classified information.

Sweat ran into his eyes.

The flapping was nearly oppressive. His teeth seemed to rattle in their sockets.

He could no longer hear the crashing monstrosity that dashed through the woods.

He gripped the handgun in both hands, and the two hands jostled for position, slick fingers shaking. Somehow, he released the safety on his 9mm. Shoot to kill. That is what the military guys had been teaching him. They had finally relented and constantly told him that he should just shoot with the intention of hitting his target.

With wide eyes and a racing heart, Beckett started to raise the gun and aim it with steadfast intention of hitting something. He caught fleeting glimpses of a massive, tawny colored creature charging creature through the camouflaged of the thick forest. Oh, God, it _was_ an alicorn!

"Carson!"

Rodney's hoarse panicked scream had Beckett twisting his upper body around just in time to have his heavy issued off-world coat and vest snared by the large brutally-curved talons. Said talons were solidly attached to oversized legs that ran jointed up to an exceptionally large leather winged bird. Its sheer bulk would have given an elephant a run for its money in size.

In the flash of a moment, the doctor was torn off the ground, dangling from curled talons within the grip of the largest leather-winged bird of prey he had even seen. The only leather-winged bird of prey he had ever seen. He hoped it didn't have bumble foot.

What did Nonor say about the things? - so imposing that no race had ever dared name it. The gun fell from his hands. He watched it fall a small black dot that only got smaller as it tumbled away like a discarded rock. He could probably hit more things with a rock.

Bad luck…bad luck…bad luck. Screaming, he squeezed his eyes closed as he sped away from the ground. All he ever had going off world was bad luck! No one else has been scooped up by some winged creature. Why him? Wee feral bunny rabbits didn't seem so bad right now. Bring them on. He knew how to roast up a good hare.

Beckett opened his eyes and found himself lifted high above the forest canopy. He stared down at the shrinking prone figure of Rodney.

A shadow broke through the forest into the clearing. It was Ronon. It had been Ronon who had been running at them from the woods. Carson watched with slight detachment as large red energy bolts streaked across the sky toward the screaming winged monster that held him.

For a moment Beckett prayed Ronon's aim was true, until he realized just how small and far away Ronon and McKay looked from his lofty vantage point.

"Oh no…oh no…oh no…no…no…no…" Beckett mumbled despondently. He kicked his legs and wiggled as red flashes of energy streaked by, barely missing him.

The raptor screamed in a high pitch wail that had Beckett screaming himself. The unmistakable smell of burnt tissue wafted down to him.

The creature lurched to the side. Beckett's body thrashed around, his leg careening out like the tail end of a whip.

"Oh God. Oh God. Oh God," he whispered as more red bolts zipped dangerously close to him and found their mark.

The raptor screamed again and jerked a hundred and eighty degrees to the left.

Beckett's legs flew out in the opposite direction of his shoulders and upper body.

More energy bolts zapped past and exploded mercilessly into the massive feathered body that clutched him.

The raptor screamed again. Beckett mimicked it.

Another blast found its mark. The bird was thrown forward, head down, giving Beckett a nauseatingly close view of its razor-toothed beak and sword shaped tongue.

"Oh God. Oh God. Oh God."

Beckett closed his eyes. He promised he'd never have another sarcastic remark for Rodney again when it came to medicine. He promised never to threaten him again with a prostate exam. He would give Rodney his undivided and most sympathetic attention possible. Carson whispered desperate pleading promises, if only he would be spared a useless death at the claws of an overgrown chicken hawk with leather wings. His cousins would laugh at him until they cried themselves silly. The humility of it all; the injustice of it!

He could hear the whine of more laser bolts from Ronon's gun.

The massive bird jerked again.

Beckett felt the talons loosened their grip. His vest ripped, popping just a few stitches, jerking him dangerously close to freedom.

Carson peeled open one eye and looked at the forest terrifyingly far below him.

He was wrenched again as another talon tore through his vest. The material of his right shoulder ripped free. He dangled precariously from his left while the right side of his body dropped few feet closer to the diminutive trees and expansive forest.

He began to twist in a nauseating circle.

Another volley of red blasts streaked by.

The rhythmic flapping of the leather wings faltered. As a pair, the bird of prey and he dropped like a stone for a brief terrifying moment.

The trees below gave way to large blue expanse of water.

The beating wings started again, bringing their fall to a jolting halt.

The seams on his coat over the left shoulder tore. He freefell a few inches until his vest was snared within the talons. The material was yanked upward up under his jaw and across part of his face forcing his head to the side. Beckett clutched firmly to the top of the vest, hoping to keep it on and hoping to prevent it from shearing his head off.

The flapping faltered again.

The creature cried. Its sharp screams pierced the area. Beckett cringed, drawing his legs up closer to his midsection. He was going to be dropped by a bird…the only thing missing was newly washed car to land on. His life should have had a more graceful ending.

The stitching of his vest gave.

For a moment Carson Beckett was freefalling. In a last ditch effort to avoid mimicking urate, he desperately reached up and snared one scaly leg just above the creature's foot and held on for dear life.

The bird screamed again, bellowing its rage and fright as the duo once again plummeted to the right and toward the water.

Beckett held on desperately, matching the creature's distressed scream.

They careened toward the water like a badly formed cinderblock.

The desperate flapping of leather wings sounded overhead. It slowed their descent just a fraction. Turning their freefall from one of sure death into a possible severe maiming.

Beckett wasn't sure he wanted to limp away from this.

The red energy bursts once again started zipping past him. The smell of burning flesh was marked by the horrific cries of pain from the bird.

They continued to fall toward the water. The creature continued to beat its wings, trying to slow its own descent.

Beckett could make out the shoreline. It seemed too close. The water too shallow.

He began kicking and wiggling trying to influence the creature's direction, push it out to deeper water.

Hell, from this height, he'd be lucky to walk away with intact bones. Slamming into a sandy shoreline would do little to improve his chances. And sand in ones socks and underwear was not something easily removed. The little unseen grains were tenacious and hellacious. Broken bones or not, chaffing in some areas of the body by sand was not to be tolerated.

Another red bolt of energy flashed by, singing the underside of Beckett's right arm. "Knock it off, you daft Bugger!" Beckett screamed, competing with the panicked cries of the failing creature.

In a desperate attempt to lose its dinner-turned-hitchhiker, the giant bird reached around with its massive head and plucked the 'cling-on' from its leg.

Beckett found himself hanging by his coat from the saw-toothed beak facing the water.

"Oh no," he whispered as the bird let go.

His screams followed him down through his freefall. He whirled his arms and kicked with his legs in a mad attempt to slow his too rapid decent into the crystal clear blue water below.

At the last moment, he pulled his legs in together, hugged his arms in close to his side and hit the water as straight has he could, not sure if it was proper thing to do or not - and not really caring. Bubbles rushed passed him as he shot through the water like an unleashed arrow. It was amazing how loud it sounded as he careened through the depths.

**TBC**

A/N: There seem to be more lizards in the bunker. It's hard to keep track of them. I've started putting letters on them but I've run through the alphabet already. I should have figured out a better system. Mr. H is standing on my head right now. Lady Y just ran down my back. Sydney "S" is in the coffee pot again. I didn't put him there.

A/N: MORE FEEDBACK. I know you want to do it. Follow your instincts. Yes, even though you have reviewed before. Even if you've offered feedback several times, you must give me more. You can't help it.


	21. 21:The Insidious Sand

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE: THE INSIDIOUS SAND**

A/N: Thank you for your feedback. Although not all of you praise me, I know that there is love for me in your hearts. More praise please.

A/N: You know, I haven't noticed this before, but the lizards appear to be carrying spatulas. They use them to caress me. Also, they seem to be collecting into strange formations. I haven't been able to fathom the purpose of all this yet.

[{O}]

In the forest clearing, standing over McKay, Ronon holstered his gun and looked down at the scientist. "Got it."

"Carson?" Rodney whispered, his apprehension as clear as the soaking blood on his bandage. He'd managed to lift himself up enough for Ronon's coat to slip down some, showing the livid pink of his shoulder.

"Pretty sure he fell into the lake."

"Pretty sure?"

"Very sure," Ronon said confidently.

"He doesn't like the water," Rodney stated softly and closed his eyes. He gave up trying to wrestle himself up onto his elbows. It seemed dizziness assaulted him every time he raised his head above his shoulders.

"Better than being an MRE," Ronon said in his assured understated manner. Quickly, the Satedan knelt and tucked his coat up over McKay's shoulders again. Looking down, he saw the horn start to roll away from the folds of the jacket and grabbed it before it could. "Better than being dinner."

"You would think so," Rodney mumbled not truly convinced Carson would feel that way.

"I saw him," Nonor announced, appearing suddenly at the top of the black-sand cliff just visible through the thin trees in that direction. She had obviously been down by the lake, and was now returning. "He broke through the surface and is swimming toward shore." She jogged towards them.

Rodney rolled his eyes and was swamped by vertigo. Of course Carson was swimming to shore, what else would he be doing? Question was—why hadn't she stayed to help him?

Still gripping the horn, Ronon stood and made a step in Nonor's direction—the direction of the lake, then paused, looking back down at McKay.

"Go. Make sure he's okay," Rodney ordered, closing his eyes again. As much as he did not want to be left alone with Nonor, he'd feel better if Dex was keeping an eye on Beckett and not his sister. McKay doubted that he'd make it off this planet alive if something unfortunate happened to Carson.

The Satedan eyed the astrophysicist for a bit. After a moment he simply nodded. Nonor had paused at the edge of the clearing.

"Nonor, come back and watch Doctor McKay."

She grimaced as she traversed the few yards back to the clearing and the two men. "But, I—"

Her brother cut her off.

"You shame the warriors of Satedan, Nonor. You were assigned a responsibility and abandoned it. You sought the comfort of childish dream animals instead of defending those who rely upon you. Even the alicorn of our myths would find wrong doing in that."

Nonor dropped her eyes, chastised and embarrassed, though her eyes still sparkled with defiance.

"You will watch him," Ronon stated firmly. "On your honor."

She grimaced again, then nodded. "Fine."

Accepting that, Ronon left the small clearing.

Within a few minutes he stood on the edge of the same solid dirt cliff overlooking the lake. With a small smile, he observed with some amusement as the physician swam a few more strokes before gaining his feet in shallow water. He watched as Beckett stumbled left and right with his arms out trying to find his balance. He managed a few unsteady steps in shin deep water staggering haphazardly toward the beach. Ronon scrutinized the physician as he trudged erratically from the massive lake, arbitrarily shaking his hands as if trying to rid them of dripping water. At least he'd managed to clean off all the remaining alicorn guts.

Dex smiled half-heartedly as Beckett shook one hand and then the other and finally both together in irritation as water persisted to run onto them.

"Beckett!" Ronon hollered.

The doctor staggered one more step and left the water. He stood on the black sand beach weaving in small circles.

Carson looked up, searching the small cliff face for the source of the call.

His eyes landed on Dex who waved both arms over his head. "Are you alright?!"

[{O}]

Carson could hear and see Ronon, waving at him like a loon, but really wasn't in the mood to answer at the moment. Instead, he chose to mutter.

"Fine- bloody, well fine. Not every day you get your ass shot out of the sky by a laser gun and plummet to your death with some prehistoric bird of prey. I'm doing bloody well marvelous. Couldn't be doing any better. Practically kicking my heels up, I'm doing so bloody wonderful." Beckett snorted in disgust as he continued to try to dry his hands on his wet pant legs. He managed to smear sand all over his hands. "Bloody hell."

"Beckett?!" Ronon shouted again, having not received an answering wave from the stumbling physician.

"What does he want? My first born?" Beckett whispered to himself. He lifted his head and stared up at the cliff and realized for the first time that he might not be doing 'fine'.

Vertigo hit him like a sledgehammer off the side of his head. One moment he was standing up and staring up at Ronon who stood at the top of a cliff, and the next he found himself face down, staring at sand particles up close and personal. Hell, he was going to get sand where he didn't want it.

"Beckett?" There was a hint of concern in Ronon's disembodied voice.

"Not so fine at the moment," Carson mumbled quietly to himself. Not so fine. Not at all.

[{O}]

Ronon watched the unmoving doctor from the top of the short cliff and waited just a moment. Beckett had yet to move. Then, with a softly voiced swear, Dex leaped brazenly over the edge of the dirt cliff and freefell a few yards until he hit the soft black crumbling dirt of the sloping face. He slid madly down the near vertical surface, leaning back with one hand to keep his balance while wind-milling the other. He kept his eyes fixed to the black sand beach below. Fist-sized rocks rolled passed, clunking into one another, passing clods of rolling loam. Ronon kept his balance as he leaned backward, keeping his weight on his heels as he careened the last few yards to the sand.

Dr. Beckett had not moved.

"Beckett!" Dex's deep voice rang out with the sharp tinge of authority.

"Go 'way," Beckett mumbled quietly into the sand with his eyes closed. He wasn't military and was damned if he took orders from anyone right at this moment.

The Satedan, jogged the last few yards to the prone man, concern rising. Sheppard had left both doctors under his protection and he had failed them.

"Dr. Beckett," Ronon called again and dropped to one knee beside the Scot.

"Go 'way," Carson mumbled again.

Ronon cocked his head to the side. "Are you hurt?"

"Are you blind, man?" Beckett stated incredulously. He pushed himself up over onto his back, further covering himself in the fine black grains of sand and stared at the brilliant blue sky. He absently wiped his hands on his sand-covered jacket. The sand rolled and skidded about his skin, working its way between his fingers and under his nails. It worked under clothing and scoured the sensitive skin at the boundaries between hems, cuffs and waistline. "I've just done my best impersonation of urate, the jumper's missing, Rodney's dying. We got wee little bunnies that eat flesh raining down from the trees, nasty llama beasties with razor sharp horns trying to skewer us, massive winged pterodactyls the size of jet fighters..." Beckett blinked trying to make out the shadowed features of the Satedan through the glare of the sun and added with exasperation, "And I fear things are only going to get worse."

A short moment later, things got worse.

Without warning the ground suddenly gave out from underneath them as another earthquake hit.

Beckett yelped, reflexively reaching out to grab a hold of something as the one time solid if not annoying sand suddenly disappeared. He found himself unexpectedly freefalling for the second time that day, only this time it was through an overgrown gopher hole. Perhaps a network of tunnels left by a family of over-zealous prairie dogs? His mind whirled with possibilities as he fell butt first through the ground.

"Beckett!?" Ronon shouted as the doctor promptly disappeared from sight. The Satedan threw himself backward away from the disappearing ground to no avail, and Ronon found himself freefalling in the same expanding hole that had swallowed Beckett. His last shout was for his sister.

[{O}]

Nonor immediately ran forward towards the edge of the cliff when she heard her brother shout her name, forgetting the man left in her care. Beneath her, the ground undulated and shook, but she managed to keep her feet as everything shifted. She was just in time to see her brother fall down a massive hole near the bottom of the cliff face. Sand cascaded after him, and suddenly, a large chunk of solid, turquoise colored earth, fell from the cliff and covered the hole like a cork stoppering a wine bottle.

"RONON!" she screamed.

[{O}]

McKay felt the horrific shaking and tilted his head to the right, towards the big hole that marked where the jumper had fallen. His eyes widened as he saw a large, feather-leafed tree on the far side of the hole appear to erupt from its moorings in the soil and come crashing down. With a yelp, he did the only thing he could—he rolled.

The massive tree slammed down just feet from him, completely covering the hole where the jumper had fallen, the wind of its felling rolling him even further.

When he stopped, he was lying on his stomach, completely unconscious, Ronon's coat splayed around him like a shroud.

[{O}]

"Get down!" one of the molemen yelled, Sheppard thought it might have been Bebbil. Trusting them completely (for no other reason than they had no choice), Teyla and Sheppard hit the dirt—just as a large quake shook the dirt walls around them like some much jelly.

"It'll pass!" Bebbil called again. "These tunnels are stronger than the tremors."

Mang spoke up from somewhere near to Teyla, "Feels like it's coming from the lake, love!"

"Is that where we're going?" Sheppard called back into the pervasive blackness.

"Why does he keep asking dumb questions?" Dabbo's voice floated over the cacophonous shaking. "Isn't that where ships are normally found?"

Sheppard caught Teyla staring at him, her eyes shining in the darkness, bright with worry as dirt spilled down on top of them.

[{O}]

The sound of cascading sand surrounded Ronon, drowning out all other noise.

Ronon did not holler or scream. He did not raise his voice or waste precious energy fighting the inevitable. Instead, he fell silently, keeping his body relaxed and quiet waiting for the impending brutal stop.

It came blessedly sooner rather than later.

He landed feet first with a splash. His knees bent as he dropped and stuttered a step to the side, maintaining his balance and dispersing the energy of his fall. Sand shifted under his feet and water lapped just at his knees. He snapped his gun up to fire at any foolish threat that thought it would capture him unaware.

He heard splashing coming from his left, mingled with disgusted accent laden curses.

The Satedan squinted his eyes, trying to see through the gloom. He stood in a small body of knee deep icy water within a large cavern, shafts of light illuminating it from tiny holes far overhead. His eyes were drawn from the fumbling doctor who appeared incapable of making it successfully to his feet to the missing puddle jumper that sat like a mirage off to his right. A sense of relief flooded him.

Perhaps things were improving.

Ronon waded through the water toward the blundering doctor with determined steps, holstering his weapon.

Beckett pushed himself back up to his feet, cursing madly under breath, but once again lost his balance. He flailed his arms wildly as he crashed downward, though he was hard pressed at the moment to know which direction was down. Water closed over his head and face as he slipped below the dark surface.

A firm grip latched onto his upper arm and yanked him partially above the surface. Beckett gasped for breath and blindly reached for the solid grip that held him above the water.

"Beckett," Dex spoke again keeping tight grip on the physician's arm.

"I'm all right," Carson muttered slightly panicked. "Dropped from the sky, fell through the ground. It's alright. I'm all right. No problems. Doin' fine." The Scot attempted to shake one hand free of the water and lost his balance. He tilted to the side.

"Beckett!" Ronon's sharp tone cut through the small area.

Carson snapped his head up, managed to keep his knees from buckling and remained somewhat on his feet as his little dark world whirled around him. His wide-eyed glance swept the dimmed area and landed on the dirt-dusted jumper that seemed so out place in such a dreary place.

The puddle jumper sat perched on a dry mound of land as if on a pedestal for display.

"Ohh, a jumper," Beckett whispered with a touch of awe, his accent thickening. He looked owl-eyed up toward Ronon, "Parked in a puddle." A bright, pleased smile dimpled his cheeks. "Do ya think there are more of them down here, lad?"

Dex tightened his grip on the doctor's arm and pulled him more upright, straightening the left-sided list that had Beckett heading back toward the water. "That is our jumper." Ronon began leading them toward the Ancient craft.

"Really? I don't remember parking it down here." Beckett blinked a few times, tripped over his feet, stumbling in a twisted fashion back into the water. He stared at the jumper and then back up at Ronon. "Do you?"

"You are not all right." Ronon once again lifted the doctor up out of the water by the grip on his upper arm.

"Ach, no. My shoes are wet." Beckett tried to lift a foot from the water to prove his point but his precarious balance had him tipping into the Satedan. "I'm wet."

"You will survive." Ronon propelled the doctor forward toward the jumper. "You must fly us out of here." Under Ronon's sturdy and steadying guide, they splashed their way toward the puddle jumper.

"Ha, that's a good one," Beckett mumbled wading through the water that reached just above his knees. Carson suddenly stopped, forcing the big Satedan to stop as well.

"Beckett?" Ronon asked with some concern. He stared quizzically at the doctor's concentrated expression that suddenly turned sour. Dex feared the man might be sick.

"Ah crap, I've got sand in my shoes." Carson once again tried to lift his foot to show Ronon but managed only to tumble backward.

Dex tightened his grip and pushed the doctor upright. "You can fly with sand."

"Ach, no I can't," Beckett stated. Sand in his shoes meant sand on his heels. It'd scour the skin away in no time, not to mention the fine grains that grated and gritted abrasively between his toes. Sand would never do. Then something else caught in his jumbled mind, and he looked quizzically up at Ronon. "What do you mean, fly?"

Ronon propelled him forward uncaring of his dilemma.

The mismatched duo weaved and trudged their way through the chilled, blackened, water toward rear hatch of the puddle jumper.

**TBC**

A/N: For some reason, the lizards feel the need to massage me with the spatulas. Their attention is starting to leave welts. Just as long as my toes don't start glowing...

A/N: Yes, you want to do it. Leave me feedback. Really, I deserve it. This story is damn good. You can't deny it. Tell me how much you love it.


	22. 22:The Epiphany

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO: THE EPIPHANY**

A/N: Your feedback continues to give me the will to live. Even the feedback that states perplexing things. And some of you (I believe you know who you are) are perplexing indeed. To angw who asked about my glowing toes, I am told that when one is given a massage this might happen. I didn't believe it when I heard it and I hope it doesn't happen. I will keep you posted. The lizards continue to paddle me lovingly with their spatulas. It's cute, but annoying

A/N: Sorry that I'm a bit late in posting tonight. The lizards were extra paddly with their massage tools and my toes nearly glowed this time - nearly - they are still beige, hairy and glow-free.

[{O}]

The shaking stopped, and Nonor stopped with it, standing on the cliff edge, peering down at the lakeshore. She froze, eyes glued to the site where she had seen her brother disappear. She didn't breathe, didn't blink, her heart even seemed to stop beating.

"No," she whispered finally, letting out a pained breath. She fell to her knees, looking at the spot where Ronon had disappeared. He had been sucked down into a sinkhole and the rocks and dirt had filled in the space after him - buried alive. Shaking more, she looked up from the shore and out to the low valley beyond, taking in the serene, glittering lake filling much of it. And realized saw no sign of the healer either.

She was alone.

No, wait, not alone.

She turned, her eyes focusing on the still figure lying on the ground in the clearing. She could just make out his form from here through the trees—he had rolled onto his stomach. When had that happened? And...he wasn't moving. Was McKay dead? From here…he looked dead.

"No," she whispered again, body stilled once more, depression pressing down on her limbs like a heavy shroud. If McKay was dead…if they were all dead… eaten by nuttalli, killed by the alicorn... swallowed up by the ground... She swallowed, tears brimming in her eyes, and shook her head.

Was she alone?

"This isn't the way it should be," she whimpered, the seriousness of the situation finally occurring to her.

This place was the place of her dreams, her hopes, her wildest aspirations. It was the place that all warriors wished to come, to be found worthy by the creatures here, to become one with its wonders. But…

It had taken her brother from her.

The others...she didn't care much about them. She could explain what happened to them, why they had died, but...

Not Ronon. Not her brother. The brother she had wanted to see again for so long; the brother she had wanted to impress; the brother she had wanted to be proud of her and her accomplishments... The brother she had missed so desperately.

Ctesias had taken him? WHY?

Ronon Dex was always one of Sateda's greatest warriors. A hero in every sense - strong, powerful, an expert with weapons, not to mention being one of the most honest, selfless and caring people she had ever known. He took care of her after their parents had been culled, when the two of them were just children - protecting her up until the day the Wraith had taken him as well. And to find he had survived! No one survived being culled, and then to be a Runner for _seven_ years…it just made him greater in her eyes.

If there was ever anyone who should be deemed worthy by Ctesias, it was Ronon Dex. But this place had swallowed him whole.

And the realization of it was like someone striking a match inside her soul.

It had taken her brother. Her brother! She had just gotten him _BACK_!

Something black and ugly simmered inside her, growing hotter and hotter with each passing moment.

"No," she hissed, physically shaking with anger now. "No!"

She got back to her feet, her eyes wild as she scanned the lake, the forest, and the clearing. She was no longer looking for something to cuddle...she was looking for something to kill.

"RONON!" she screamed, arms outspread, face tilted towards the blue sky. This terrible place had taken him from her! Ripped him from her side, so soon after she had found him again.

How she HATED it!

Suddenly, everything that had happened since they had arrived on this planet took on new meaning, the events given new clarity. She recognized the creatures for what they were—monsters—and the landscape for what it was—mud-covered and dangerous. Nothing here was as she imagined, except perhaps in her nightmares. Including…what had happened with the alicorn. She had worshipped that creature her whole life, but all she could see now was the way it had pierced that nuttalli without warning or reason. Then Jerkins. And then…

By the Ancestors, it would have killed her as well! She knew that now. She'd tried not to admit it before, but how could she avoid it now? Which means…

McKay really _had_ saved her life.

A soft gasp emitted from her throat, and she finally turned to face the clearing again.

What was she doing? He'd saved her life! And she was letting him die!

As suddenly as she'd frozen before, she was now running, headed back to the clearing. She had to get to him! She barely spared a glance for the fallen tree that filled a chunk of the clearing, caring about nothing but getting back to the scientist.

As if to mock her, she suddenly saw a group of nuttalli emerge from the trees, bounding over to McKay, a blanket of pink, purple and teal. He showed no recognition of the danger he was in, not moving a muscle to defend himself.

No! Not him, too!

The rage filling her had gone beyond mere anger - it was so pure it felt like it was searing her from the inside out. She let out a scream of fury, the bellow echoing across the dirt-filled clearing, and for the first time since arriving on the planet, pulled the gun the Atlantian's had lent her from her holster. The nuttalli stopped at the almost inhuman sound, shifting nervously, and turning their cute little heads in her direction.

Then those cute little heads started popping off one by one as every single one of Nonor's shots hit their marks, like children popping the heads off of Dandelions.

She never let up her rebel yell, never let up firing, just kept going until every single one of those horrific little creatures was dead. A mass of pink, purple, teal and now red. They hadn't stood a chance.

Breathing hard, she studied the forest before her, gun trained to match the shifting of her eyes as she searched for danger…and more things to vent her anger on.

When she finally gave up finding other things to shoot, she backed off, lowering the weapon to check on the scientist at her feet. He was completely unconscious, the bandage on his shoulder awash with red. Hastily, she shoved the weapon back into her holster and knelt next to him, pressing a hand to his neck. Faintly, gratefully, she felt the pulse in his neck. Slow, erratic, but there.

She tore open the front of her leather bodice, reaching inside for the small jar of salve she had brought with her - what she'd held back from the seemingly wasteful antics of Doctor Beckett back on Atlantis. There wasn't much left, just a couple of fingertips, but maybe it would be enough.

Ripping off the useless bandage, she turned him over and touched the salve to the ugly, gaping wound on his shoulder, praying that it would work.

McKay groaned, his head turning. She glanced at his pain-filled face, and guilt warred with the rage, nearly overwhelming her. She had promised her brother to protect this man - to help him. She had promised to protect Doctor Beckett too. And she had failed - on all counts.

No wonder Ronon had looked so angry.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered as she put all of it on his shoulder. "So, so sorry."

Tears rained down her face now, mixing with the blood from McKay's shoulder, and she closed her eyes.

"Please be enough," she pleaded.

[{O}]

"Amazingly resilient wee things, aren't they," Beckett slurred, practically slamming into the side of the jumper as they reached it. He pressed his cheek against the cool metal, a silly grin on his face. "There y'are," he said, "pretty lady."

Ronon gave the loopy physician a concerned look as he pulled out his remote for the jumper. Hitting the button, he sighed in relief as the back hatch opened without a problem. He'd been terrified it would be too badly damaged to open. Now, he prayed it could still fly...

The ship was tilted slightly, its back end in the water, but it was at least upright. The hatch opened until it couldn't open anymore, disappearing into the cold, black water of this underground lake.

"Come on, Doc," Ronon said, grabbing Beckett by the shoulder and pulling him around and inside. Beckett let himself be pulled, taking everything in groggily.

"Cold in here," he muttered as Ronon shoved him forward. He slipped a little on the floor, his wet boots sliding back a step. "The floor's uneven. Who parked this thing?"

"No one," Ronon reminded him, closing the back hatch behind them. It came up, but protested a little, metal giving an unhealthy squeal. "It fell through a hole, remember?"

"A hole?" Beckett blinked and tottered to the side, then abruptly sat on one of the benches. He pulled at one of his boots, determined to get at the onerous sand that pooled there. "Where?"

Ronon grimaced, taking the physician by the shoulder again before he could get loose of the laces and forced him back to his feet. "Above us. And we need to fly back out of it. Get back to McKay and Nonor. Then, find the others."

"Fly...out?" Beckett blinked, letting himself be shoved forward into the cockpit, but, when he understood that Ronon meant to put him in the pilot's chair, he balked.

"No, no, no," he muttered, grabbing and bracing himself on the back of the chair. "No flying. Not me. I don't like flying."

"Beckett," Ronon stressed, pushing harder at the physician's broad back. "We don't have a choice. It's our only way out. You have to fly it. You know I can't."

"But I can't!" Beckett stressed again. "I'm terrible at it! Plus... I think I might not be totally well... I mean, there is only one of you, right?" Blue eyes blinked over his shoulder at Ronon, squinting in the low light. "Because... I'm seeing more than one, you know. There's you, and there's half of you to your right, and half of you to your left..."

Ronon bit his bottom lip. "Yeah, I know, Beckett. I know. You're hurt...pretty badly, but you have to do this. We have to get out of here."

Beckett stayed firmly rooted, shaking his head, and then obviously regretting it as he winced in pain. Finally, softly, he asked, "Can't Rodney do it? He's better n' me."

"Rodney's why you have to do it," Ronon urged. "Remember? He's dying. You have to get back up there with the jumper to help him. His shoulder...remember?"

Beckett blinked again, and he looked up, eyes looking clearly at Ronon for the first time.

"Rodney?"

"Yeah."

"I forgot... his shoulder... Oh God. I have to get back to him."

"Yes." Ronon pointed out the window. "So, can you fly it?"

Beckett turned, then stepped forward around the chair, almost falling into it when he finally sat down. Shaking, wet hands touched the console, and the jumper lit up. Forgetting about the sand that had gotten into every crease of his body, he peered out the window, perhaps realizing that he couldn't actually see anything.

In response, the HUD came up, showing the interior of the cavern in vivid 3-D. Beckett listed a little as he refocused to the HUD screen, and then gritted his teeth.

"Hang on," he muttered, "Here goes nothing..."

The jumper lifted off the ground...and immediately careened to the left, smashing into a stalagmite and breaking off the top with an ugly tearing noise. It topped over the top of the jumper, landing with a crash beside them.

Beckett gave a weak smile at Ronon, who had braced himself against the co-pilot's console at the impact.

"Whoops."

[{O}]

"We there yet?" Sheppard called. He stared at nothing but the top of the head he could see bobbing in front of him. Their eyes had adjusted to the low glow of the threads that lined the ceiling, but only enough to see vague shapes, and everything appeared in a sort of gray haze.

"Almost, tall one," Mang said from somewhere behind him. The female moleman... molewoman?... was leading Teyla.

"Above-ground creatures are always so impatient," Bebill muttered in annoyance. "We get there when we get there."

"Colonel," Teyla said softly, "I... I think I can hear water. And..."

Suddenly, a loud noise—sounding a lot like two cars crashing into each other—burst forth from somewhere up ahead. The moleman all immediately stopped.

Another crash sounded, though this one sounded a little less severe.

"What is that?" Sheppard asked.

Bebbill turned his head, his large eyes blinking up at the colonel. He looked terrified.

"That..." he said, "is a sound I have never heard before, and I have heard many things in these tunnels."

"Run away! Run away!" Dobba squealed, and, before Sheppard and Teyla knew what was happening, their companions were gone.

Another crash echoed through the hall.

Sheppard looked at Teyla, and she pulled out the green light stick from her pocket. She tossed it to Sheppard and he caught it one-handed. She pulled another...and the two jogged towards the sound.

The only thing they knew for sure is...there was a distinctive metal clamor to the crashing, which could only mean one thing...

[{O}]

Nonor frowned, looking down at Rodney's shoulder. It was healed, but not well. It looked raw still, puffy and thin, as if the salve had just done the bare minimum, but maybe…maybe it was enough? She had no idea if it had done anything for the blood loss or the other wounds - like his ribs - but it was all she could do. The salve was gone now. She put the scraped clean jar back inside her torn bodice with a sigh, then untwisted the tan coat from around his body free to better cover him with it. His heartbeat seemed stronger now, his breathing more even. He looked only like he was asleep.

Rustling from the woods had her looking up again. It grew louder, and she stood to face down the new threat, gun held in unwavering, highly skilled hands.

"I will not let you have him," she spat. "I promised my brother to take care of this man, and I will. No one and no thing will take him from me. So, whatever you are, you had better…."

She trailed off as the alicorn emerged from the trees, as beautiful as ever. Obviously, it wasn't the same one. Looking closely, she realized the markings were different, but the gleaming horn, the large eyes, the golden sheen were all the same.

And so was the sharpness of its teeth.

Nonor straightened...and bared her own.

The alicorn was about to meet its match.

**TBC**

A/N: If you do not leave me a review you will have bad luck. You don't want bad luck, do you?.


	23. 23:The Determined

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE: THE DETERMINED**

A/N: I think some of you might adore me. Yes, I believe that is possible. Send me more feedback so that I may be sure.

A/N: The lizards seem to be getting more aggressive. I think this is called 'deep tissue massage'. Thank you, my reptile friends!

[{O}]

The alicorn moved forward, overconfident, gracefully skirting the fallen tree and the large hole it covered, and walking to where the dead nuttalli were. Nonor followed it with her weapon, never letting up her aim. It gnashed its teeth at her, stepping gingerly through the mass of pastel colored nuttalli flesh when it reached it.

"I can kill you, you know," Nonor told it simply. "My brother was an excellent shot, but I'm better."

The alicorn snorted, and spat.

How could she not see how ugly the creature was before? Ugly and mean.

And then another emerged, coming up behind the first. Nonor let out tight breath. Okay, two...not so simple. This one was smaller, thinner, but it also looked faster. There was dried blood on its muzzle. It sneered at her when it reached the first alicorn's side, then bent its head to snuffle among the fresh meat the dead nuttalli presented. The first continued to stare at her a moment longer, then it too dropped its head to eat at the carrion. They chomped and ripped at the flesh, gnashing bones between their teeth and sending blood splattering.

Swallowing down the bile that had risen in her throat, Nonor bent down next to McKay, still not lowering her weapon's aim. The creatures were distracted for now, but for how long?

"Doctor McKay," she hissed, nudging him a little with her foot. "Doctor, can you hear me?"

He gave a soft groan, and she smiled in relief - he was still with her.

"Doctor," she called, a little more loudly, "You need to wake up. Can you wake up?"

He mumbled something, so she nudged him harder with her foot. "Please, Doctor, you need to wake up."

A blue eye cracked, and looked up at her. "Nonor?"

She smiled, full wattage. "Yes. Can you move?"

The eye closed and he shifted a little, wincing at the movement.

"Please," she repeated, "Can you move?"

"Did," he paused, sucking in a breath, "Did you just say 'please' to me?"

She chose to ignore that, starting to get a little impatient. "Can you move?"

"Where are the oth—"

"Dead. It's just you and me. Now, can…you…MOVE?"

Both of his eyes shot open. "Dead?"

She gave a tense nod, and it was then that he must have realized that she wasn't actually looking at him, for he turned his head to follow her gaze towards the two alicorn feasting on the pile of dead nuttalli about ten feet away.

"Oh," he shifted again, rolling onto his unhurt side, using his good arm and shoulder to lever himself up. He frowned a little as he recognized the coat sliding off of him, then looked up again at the predators nearby.

The movement had caused the larger alicorn to look up again, and it sneered at McKay. The scientist paused. Nonor's hands gripped the weapon in her hands more tightly. She thought she could probably kill both alicorn, but would she be fast enough? And, if they were dead as well, what foul creatures would their blood attract?

McKay glanced up at her, and his face registered surprise that she actually seemed to be covering him.

"I will not let them harm you," she promised him, hoping it wasn't too little too late. McKay's eyes widened slightly, and he looked again towards the alicorn.

After a moment, the larger alicorn finally lowered its head once more.

McKay let out a harsh breath, and started…slowly…to push himself up again.

"Don't forget my brother's coat," Nonor whispered. McKay nodded slightly, and the hand that was working grabbed onto the tan leather material, gripping it tightly as he continued to straighten up.

He teetered a little once he was to his knees, and Nonor let go one hand from her weapon to help him stand up. Getting her hand under his arm, she pulled him to his feet, and then started to slowly back up, still gripping his arm and thus bringing him with her. McKay, clearly not totally with it, stumbled a little, but moved, dragging Ronon's coat behind him. His eyes looked like they were ready to close again.

Once she had him facing the opposite direction and walking…somewhat…steadily away from the mess, Nonor glanced back at the two alicorn… and to her horror found two more had joined them - along with some alive nuttalli. They were all feasting like vultures! And movement in the trees suggested more might be coming.

She decided not to let McKay know.

[{O}]

"BECKETT!" Ronon yelled, as the ship smashed into a large stalactite, chunks of wet calcite coating the window.

"I'm trying!" Beckett yelled back. "I can't bloody well see!"

The jumper tipped backwards, and Ronon whimpered as it felt like they were freefalling for a second. Beckett had her steadied again in a moment, and turned the jumper around.

"Okay, okay, okay," the poor doctor muttered. "This is harder than it looks. Maybe we need a bigger hole?"

"You haven't found the first hole, yet!" Ronon barked.

"That's because it's not where it's supposed to be!" Beckett retorted, his head beating with a pain so fierce, it almost drowned out the other man. "I can't find what's not there!"

"Of course it's there. We looked down into it, remember?"

Beckett just shook his head, and thought about the problem.

The unmistakable sound of the jumper's weapon bays opening assaulted their ears.

"Maybe," Beckett said groggily, "If I make the hole bigger..."

"No!" Ronon shouted, reaching over to grab Beckett's arm. "Don't!"

"Why?" Carson shook his head. God, it was swimming. He wished Ronon would stop swaying like that.

"You could hit McKay and my sister up there!"

"Oh...good point." Carson leaned forward, his eyes closing. God, he had to get back to the surface – back to Rodney who was probably dead by now.

The jumper leaned forward as well...and careened down towards the underground lake.

"BECKETT! Pull up!"

The doctor sat up, and the jumper "sat up" with him, leveling off just feet from the water.

"Just land it," Ronon begged. "Please."

"But..."

"We'll find another way. You were right, you can't fly it."

Carson frowned, but landed the jumper sloppily on a sandbar of sorts sticking out of the black lake.

"I'll try again," he promised. "Let me just... catch my breath."

Ronon closed his eyes, covering his face with his hands. What the hell were they going to do?

And then the most beautiful thing happened.

Their radios came alive.

"_What the hell are you doing to my SHIP_!" Sheppard's voice yelled over the comm.

[{O}]

Nonor stopped when they reached the top of the black sand cliff and looked around at the valley below, trying to judge the best place to take McKay until help came. After all, she assumed that Atlantis would send someone once they didn't report in... right? That Doctor Weir character seemed the type to do that sort of thing. So... she just had to keep McKay alive until then. She could do that. She had to do that. She had promised her brother. And McKay had saved her life.

Besides... she really didn't want to be alone.

And then McKay, who had been swaying where he stood as they looked down at the lake, suddenly slipped to his knees, his head bowing in exhaustion, Ronon's coat pooling around him. Nonor, her hand still on his arm, nearly went down with him. Only sheer stubbornness kept her both on her feet and her hand on his arm.

"You can't stop now," she exclaimed fearfully, tugging at his arm and looking behind her at the now mostly hidden clearing. "We have to keep moving. We're not far enough away yet."

He sighed, looking up at her with shadowed eyes, his expression dark.

"How do you know they're dead?" he asked.

"What?"

"What happened to them?"

"Oh, you mean…your friends? And my brother?"

"Your brother is my friend, too."

She grimaced a little at the correction, then sighed. "I believe…nuttalli attacked your Colonel Sheppard and his team. We heard them being..." She shuddered slightly. "Let's just say, it did not sound like a pleasant demise. Then Doctor Beckett was dropped by the bird into the lake you see down there. I think he was climbing out but he is missing now - I am not sure what that means. As for my brother…" she paused, swallowing thickly, "my brother… the planet ate him."

McKay frowned, blinking slowly up at her. "What? What do you mean, 'ate him?'"

"I think it may have swallowed up your healer, too. That's why he's missing. The ground shook, opened, and they disappeared into the ground… then it closed up on top of them. As if," she sniffed, eyes filling with tears again, "they never were…."

"They fell down a hole?"

She gave him a glare (it was a hard habit to break, apparently); didn't she just tell him that they had fallen down a hole?

"Yes," she replied, her tone bordering again on impatient.

"So…you did not actually see them die," he noted.

She blinked at him, "What? Don't be silly! Of course they are dead! You don't fall down a hole and survive! The ground doesn't eat people and spit them back out whole!"

He just stared at her. "Now I know they're not dead," he said, smirking a little.

She frowned, not understanding. "What are you talking about?"

"Far as I can tell, you haven't been right about anything this whole trip. Why start now?"

Her glare could have melted mountains. And he matched it, square on… until she finally lowered her eyes.

"Either way," she said, her voice soft, "we need to get you out of here. Someplace safe."

"I'm not going anywhere," McKay replied, his tone suddenly bone weary. Her head lifted, her eyes angry.

"Of course you are! You're healed! Now we have to move. Did you not see the alicorns? They—"

"I can barely feel my legs and I definitely can't feel my arm," he admitted. "I'm just going to slow you down."

"Slow me down? On my way to where? All I want to do is find a place for you to be safe!"

"I'll slow you down… when you go looking for the others."

She stared at him, amazed. "What are you talking about?"

"They're alive. Go find them. I'll stay here and… and make sure the alicorns don't follow." There was a quaver in his voice, and it wasn't from his weak condition. He'd turned his head as he spoke, looking back towards the now five alicorns chewing on the nuttalli remains in the meadow. One of them tossed up a colorful slab of flesh and caught it between flashing teeth.

"Oh," he said, his voice faint, "weren't there just two when we started?" He swallowed, and turned to look up at her. "Well… two, five… doesn't matter. You should go now."

She continued to stare down at the top of his head, too stunned now to speak. Was he serious?

"Your friends are not alive," she said. "And those creatures will kill you as soon as they're done eating."

"They are alive. I will not give up on them. And you don't know - the alicorns could leave me alone once they've had their fill..."

She narrowed her eyes, annoyance, anger, frustration, fear, depression and loathing all coming to the fore once more.

"You are getting up, and we are going to find someplace safe, and I am going to protect you. I promised my brother. And nothing you say will change that."

He looked up at her, and, for the first time, he seemed to be looking at her with something more than the disgust he had offered her since her fight with Teyla. She drew herself up, chin lifting high.

"I am a Dex," she intoned, resting her hands on her hips. "We do not back down from a fight. We do not go back on our promises. And we do not let the bad guys win!" She opened her arms wide then, standing tall and proud. The sun lit her almost perfectly then, her golden hair glowing like a halo around her head, perfect skin glistening in the rays. "I AM NONOR DEX!" she yelled, "AND I WILL PREVAIL!"

Which, of course, was when the alicorns in the field decided that live prey was more fun than the dead … and charged across the clearing towards them.

**TBC**

A/N: You know, I never noticed this before, but the lizards, when they line up just right, almost seem to be spelling out a message for me. I don't know what UOYKCUF and EMETIB is supposed to mean though. Must be Lizard for - I love you.

A/N: Good luck shall shower upon you if you give me feedback - positive feedback. Bad luck shall be your shadow if you leave this page without reviewing me (and saying good things). You have been warned.


	24. 24:The About Time

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR: THE "ABOUT TIME"**

A/N: Your reviews have delighted me! Thank you for building that shrine in my honor. It is well deserved. Please continue to pay homage to me.

A/N: The lizards are assembling. They are lining up. I wonder what's up.

[{O}]

Sheppard let Teyla steady him as they sloshed through the frigid, dark water and awkwardly climbed the crooked ramp into the jumper.

"Are you guys crazy? What the hell are you thinking?" Sheppard raised his voice as Ronon closed the hatch once again.

Carson blinked at him from the pilot's seat. "Oh thank God." He stood, swaying precariously. "You drive." The doctor's obvious relief was tempered by the concern in his eyes as he stared at the battered and bloodied duo. "Wha-?"

Ronon eased past Teyla and grabbed Beckett, steadying him as he steered him out of the way so John could get to the front. "He's hurt," Dex stated evenly, his dark eyes meeting John's.

Sheppard bit back a sarcastic "who isn't?" Ronon looked as if he'd been on the losing side of a battle... with a tree perhaps? He wouldn't put anything past this planet. The Satedan's face and arms were scratched, torn open, bleeding and bruised and a few stray leaves and twigs remained tangled in the man's dreads. He wasn't sure he wanted to know what had happened to Carson. The man was soaking wet and looked like he couldn't see straight.

"Why are you letting him fly this damn thing at all?" John sank gratefully into jumper seat and scowled as he felt the dampness beneath him. He called up HUD to get a handle on where they were. Was that sand on the control panel?

"We have to get to the others," Ronon explained urgently. "Doctor McKay is dying."

"What?" John whipped around, forgetting about his arm and banging it against the DHD. He hissed through clenched teeth. "What happened?"

"He saved Nonor," Carson told him, resisting Teyla's assistance towards the backbench. "Even after the wretched alicorn killed Jerkin, that silly girl was walking right up to the blasted thing. He shoved her out of the way and got taken down and bitten. He won't stop bleeding." Beckett shook his head and leaned against Teyla. "I couldn't...I couldn't..." He closed his eyes, his face expressing his despair.

"Easy, Doctor," Teyla tried to reassure, as Sheppard quickly scrutinized the HUD to ensure that the jumper was still capable of flight.

But Beckett kept going, "The infection is spreading too fast, and I couldn't stop the bleeding. There was nothin' I could do."

"You will." Teyla glanced worriedly at John. The bandage on her face stood out in the stark light of the jumper.

"There's just no chance...none...he—"

"All right," John cut Carson off, satisfied that the craft would fly. "Where is he?"

"He is with Nonor, here." Ronon pointed to the schematics. "Where we first left the jumper. Fell through here." The Satedan pointed again.

The schematics showed that they were now completely blocked in. John studied it quickly, trying not to think about the time he was taking or the fact that somewhere above ground Rodney was hurt and dying, with only Nonor to take care of him.

Damn!

"Everyone get settled in," he ordered. "Teyla?" He turned in his seat, carefully this time. "You got him?"

"I do," she replied, not looking up from Carson. The doctor had sprawled onto the backbench and kept trying to slide off the edge.

"Can you fly like that?"

Sheppard looked to see Ronon indicating the arm he still cradled to his chest. "Can you hunt wraith?" he asked sharply, turning back to the HUD without waiting for an answer.

Finally he saw it, the weakest section of earthen-ceiling. He guessed it to be located under the edge of the big lake. "Sorry molemen," he muttered under his breath as the ship lifted easily off the sand bar and the weapons pods noisily opened. "Hang on!" he warned just before water and rock exploded around them.

[{O}]

Even as Nonor's proud declaration echoed up an across the hillside, Rodney heard the eerie bray of the alicorn.

"Oh God." Still on his knees he swayed with exhaustion, his eyes widening with renewed terror as in perfect formation the five alicorns began the charge.

Sparkle-dusted fur glimmered in the sunlight. Glittering hooves tore up the grass and flung mud into the sky and the gold-gilded horns shone like beacons, seeming to entice other creatures into the fray.

Behind Nonor's legendary beasts, nuttalli surged from the forest in a mass of undulating pastel. A new creature, looking like a mixture of jungle-cat and bison with impressive looking claws joined the herd. Its bright orange skin mixed amongst the pink and purple and teal. It reminded Rodney of one of those big tubs of swirled sherbet he used to be able to get on Earth. Sherbet… why did some people insist on pronouncing it 'sher-bert?' Oh God… he was going to die thinking about desserts.

Instinctively he tried to scoot further from the animals, but his legs refused to cooperate and he ended up slumped against Nonor's perfectly toned leg. Nonor stood, legs spread firmly apart, her weapon raised. Her beautiful face was twisted into a familiar scowl that Rodney was certain she'd learned from her brother.

She should have left me, he thought as she fired at the encroaching horde. She needs to survive to find the others. Why now? Why did she suddenly find him worthy enough to protect him now?

Then again...damn...she really was good!

Nonor fired again and whooped exuberantly as one of the leading alicorns went down, its horn rent from its forehead. It fell, its front legs folding up under itself as plowed into the earth. Its downed body was immediately covered with gnawing, ravaging demon bunnies, but the massive army of creatures never slowed.

Nonor took out another alicorn in the same way and then another, both bodies immediately melding into the sea of pastel. A few things stopped to tear and gnash at the ready flesh, but the bulk of the group were intent on reaching the humans.

Two alicorn remained. Their heads bowed as they paused and seemed to contemplate the latest happening. Around them, all the rest of the creatures paused with them. The horned llamas took halting, delicate steps, as they gnashed their teeth and tossed their horrible heads.

Just as Rodney started to allow some flicker of hope, the flame was extinguished. Something slithered through the grass toward them, making the pretty green groundcover undulate. He caught sight of one of the things, and then more, as they came closer - slithering amid the fluffy nuttalli. The slimy feathery creatures lifted their serpenty bird-like heads to look about and flit their forked tongues, before lowering their heads and continuing on their path - directly at Nonor and McKay. They looked like festive, horrible garden hoses in motion.

From further back, the trees swayed - and ominously stepped forward. The ground trembled with their movement. And, something as big as a haystack took a leap and let out a low 'ribbit'.

The rest of the group started forward again – their pace slowed, but their manner showed that they had no intention of stopping again. The beasts watched their prey warily, despite knowing that the advantage obviously lay with the creatures of Ctesias. They growled and chittered and chattered.

Nonor fired again and the weapon went… click.

"No," Rodney gasped, staring with Nonor at their last, now useless defense. They really were going to die. Nonor met his gaze and shook her head determinedly as she tossed the empty weapon aside.

"What the hell are you doing?" Rodney shouted as she grabbed him by his good arm and half-pulled, half-shoved him behind her, pushing him alarmingly close to the cliff's edge. He tried to settle into a comfortable position. He was sitting upright at least, but too weak to get to his feet. For some reason he was still clinging to Ronon's coat with his good hand and couldn't let it loose.

"I will fight them. With my dying breath, they will not get past me to you."

McKay knew his eyes were about to pop out of his skull. He must be hearing things. He looked at the animals, only meters away now. Yeah, he was hearing things.

"Oh, you have got to be kidding me," he whined, but another look at Nonor assured him she was serious. He recognized her stance from the few times he'd watched Teyla spar with anyone.

"We are so dead." He closed his eyes.

Somewhere far away, a massive wet explosion occurred, and he frowned as the world began to shake like a massive piece of jelly. If that was the Loch Ness Monster rearing out the lake, well...that would be just about perfect.

"I am definitely going to haunt somebody for this," he decided. The shaking increased and the sandy cliff started to disintegrate. With a whimper, he leaned forward and wrapped an arm around Nonor's leg for fear of falling off the cliff (even as he debated whether that would be an easier death then being mauled and eaten by rabid Easter bunnies and mutant unicorns). He could feel Nonor's muscles tense as she waited, ready to spring into battle.

He opened one eye and yelped, tightening his grip. The alicorn were almost on them. He could see the swirling pattern on their horns. They moved slowly and deliberately. They seemed to have gained some level of wariness for the woman warrior, but it hardly seemed to deter their goal.

"Let go of me." He heard Nonor's order and obeyed despite the futility of it. Too weak to sit up on his own, he slumped, trying to keep from falling over and watched in shock. The world grayed, the sounds of the animals faded and time seemed to slow. He could hear the wild beating of his heart and Nonor's slow, controlled breathing. He smelled the animals, sweat and the frightening stench of his own blood. He felt the breeze on his hot skin, light and pleasant. His sight zeroed in on one pink bunny, its beady black eyes shining against its fur and suddenly it was gone – simply erased - as a flash of bright yellow light skimmed past overhead and the planet exploded in front of him.

Rodney shouted as he grabbed Nonor again, earth and grass, mud and gore reigning down on them. His ears rang as he blinked and shook his head, dizziness assailing him again. He really didn't feel well.

He focused on the animals only to see the alicorn were gone. Bits of nuttalli and the funny orange creatures lay scattered about a huge hole in the ground. A huge toad twitched under a fallen tree. The beings that survived were running pell-mell back to the forest – that was busily fleeing as well.

What? Why? How?

I must be dead, McKay decided. Really, must be dead.

Dead as the nuttalli and the alicorns and the sherberty beast. But, of course, he couldn't be dead if he felt so horrible – tired, weak, beaten down – and sticky. Deep aches that bore down through his ribs and shoulder. And his nose still felt stuffed up. It would be totally unfair if he were dead and still felt so badly!

Then, there was that reek.

Attempting to verify is current living-or-dead status, McKay discovered he was covered with fresh blood and muck. He looked up at Nonor who was also coated in goo, but her hair had somehow escaped untouched, it whipped in the wind, still shiny and clean. Her wide eyes stared in visible shock at something behind them.

Ronon's coat got hit pretty hard. Rodney stared at the soiled coat, wishing he'd thought to pull it over his head before the crap hit.

Rodney shifted and turned, leaning against Nonor's leg again for the strength to stay sitting upright. Hovering over their heads was the jumper with John at the controls looking a bit worse for wear, but obviously relieved. McKay smiled with his own relief.

"How?" Nonor finally managed to speak.

"Told you, you were wrong." Rodney grinned as she huffed indignantly. He noticed though that she didn't argue.

The ground shook unsteadily and McKay saw John's eyes widened suddenly with new concern. And then he heard it - that same flapping, fluttering sound that had concerned Carson – a sound like a tarp or a tent flap.

Oh no! No! It's just damn unfair!

He couldn't bring himself to turn and see the horrible creature that had snatched up Carson. The flying thing with no name had snagged away the doctor right in front of Rodney, and would have torn him to bits with its saw-toothed beak if Ronon hadn't saved him.

Oh God. Rodney gulped as he stared at Sheppard instead of the scorched and angry flying thing. He really didn't want to die by bird. Okay, he'd been exposed to a hell of a lot of horrid deaths today – but this one seemed particularly unpleasant.

He squinted his eyes, watching Sheppard.

The colonel's brow furrowed with an expression that showed he was totally out of patience. As the jumper bobbed above, the weapons bays opened, and light streaked out with a snickering sound. McKay turned in time to see the flash hit its target.

The awful flying creature squawked like an irritated hen and exploded in another shower of sticky meat bits and entrails.

McKay groaned, squeezing his eyes shut against the latest onslaught, and gazed up at the still beautiful and golden-haired Nonor. She seemed a little glassy-eyed at all the commotion. As he rotated his gaze, he looked toward the forests. The scattered creatures had been reassembling while the bird had distracted the humans - and the beasts were heading their way.

Enough! he thought. Haven't we been through enough?

"Land already!" He motioned weakly, wondering what had happened to his radio.

Sheppard must have read his lips or understood his frantic gestures because the Colonel simply smiled and shook his head. The jumper began to pull away from the steep cliff.

"Where are they going?" Nonor panicked. "They can't leave us here."

Rodney struggled to his feet, clasping onto her arm for leverage. "They won't," he reassured, wondering what Sheppard was doing, but knowing John wouldn't leave them. "He wouldn't."

He leaned heavily against Nonor, feeling her arm reach around his waist to support him and watched as John maneuvered the jumper around so the hatch was facing them. Slowly, the hatch opened. Rodney winced at the sound it made and looked dubiously up at Ronon who stood in the opening ready to help them aboard. The edge of the hatch met the edge of the cliff.

"Hurry!" Ronon stepped toward them, reaching for McKay.

Rodney tried to help as Nonor all but hefted him over her shoulder and dragged him - still clutching her brother's coat - aboard. He felt Ronon taking over and easing him to the floor. "What took you so long?" Rodney sniped, smiling as he let his weariness take over. They were back together. He heard the hatch closing again and Ronon calling his name, but everything was growing hazy and it was too hard to think.

They could go home now.

**TBC**

A/N: As you may have noticed, this story is nearly done. Send me more feedback now or I will withhold the end.

A/N: The lizards seem to be trying to tell me something. Let me get my glasses and see if I can figure this out.


	25. 25:The Homecoming

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE: THE HOMECOMING **

A/N: HA HA HA! I made you wait a day! FOR NO REASON! That's the sort of thing I do. Why? Because I am an evil Genii! That's why! I am KOLYAAA! FEAR ME. And by the way.. I am not a wench. Check out the picture on my profile. My hat is pretty darn sexy. Women want me. Men want to be more like me. And leave reviews. Seriously, lots of them.

A/N: Julie, where are my glasses? There's lizards everywhere! My darling cow, what are they trying to tell me!

[{O}]

"They're in!" barked Ronon. "Go! Go!"

Sheppard pushed the jumper upward and resisted the urge to send a few more drones back down to blast away anything else he could on that godforsaken, 'Nightmare on Candycane Lane' of a planet.

He tuned out what little conversation there was in the rear of the ship. His thoughts drifted to Corporal 'Red' Jerkin, Sergeant Charles Boris and Doctor Robyn Bedevere and the letters he would have to write to their families. A moment later, guilt washed over him as he briefly thanked the-powers-that-be for not letting it be anyone on his own team.

He knew that Nonor had taken the seat behind his. He was acutely aware that, since the first time he met her, she was completely silent. He wondered how she would process the brutal reality of her people's grand legends. Acceptance seemed the only choice, but she struck him as the type who would carry denial to obscene lengths.

In the back of the jumper, Teyla laid a cold compress across Carson's forehead and covered him with a blanket. Carson had given McKay as much of an inspection as he could before succumbing to a dizzying assault on his equilibrium, at which point he seemed more than willing to let Ronon take over care of Rodney

"He's alive," Carson pronounced as Rodney slept. "Doesn't make sense," he muttered, closing his own eyes. "It's a bloody miracle."

Ronon laid a surprisingly gentle hand on McKay's healed shoulder, watching the scientist sleep, then glanced over at Teyla with Carson on the other bench. She returned the smile, before sitting down next to Carson's head.

And silence fell over them all, each lost in their own thoughts, as Sheppard guided the jumper for home.

[{O}]

"Ugh, God, what is that _smell_?!"

"That would be McKay."

"Where's the damn med team?"

"I've already alerted them, John. They're on their way."

"I'm doin' much better, lass, ya dinnae have to-"

"He's going down!"

"I've got him, Colonel. Dr. Beckett…please, sit."

"You're a good sort, Teyla. Why are my pants squishy?"

"What happened to my coat?"

"Colonel…" Elizabeth pressed the backs of the fingers of one hand lightly against her nostrils to prevent any more of the foul scent of entrails from penetrating her olfactory senses.

As soon as the puddle jumper had broken through the event horizon in the gateroom, she'd rushed up the steps to meet it in the jumper bay. Once it arrived, she positioned herself behind it, waiting for the bay door to open. Moments earlier, they'd received Sheppard's code for re-entry through the Atlantis gate. The colonel's terse request for a medical team in response to Elizabeth's radioed greeting made it clear that the mission didn't go as smoothly as they'd all hoped.

Sheppard now stood at the foot of the jumper's ramp and looked past Elizabeth, as if staring at the doorway across the room would bring the med team to them that much sooner. Elizabeth addressed him again, in a practiced, firm tone.

"Colonel."

Years of military convention immediately snapped Sheppard's attention to the commanding voice. Elizabeth glanced over the battered personnel in the jumper. Her stomach tightened as she noted the crew was three members short.

"What happened?"

Sheppard was still unconsciously clutching his arm to his chest. He seemed oblivious to his own injuries, but his somber expression indicated wounds of another sort.

"What didn't," he stated flatly. "We lost Jerkin, Boris and Bedevere." He didn't react to her wince, just continued with his report. "The place is a nightmare. That damn horn better cure _cancer_ for what we just went through."

"Oh dear God." A soft accented whisper drew everyone's attention down to where Carson sat with his back against the doorway of the jumper. Teyla crouched close, still watching over him. He looked up at Sheppard and Weir and the raw emotion in his expression scared Elizabeth.

"Carson…what's wrong?"

"I'm…oh God, I'm sorry…I…the thing in the woods, I mean, it was Ronon…and I, I grabbed the gun."

Weir didn't understand anything that was going on and Carson's incoherent stuttering wasn't making it any clearer. "You were going to shoot Ronon?"

"No! Well, I might have. I thought he was goin' to attack us."

"What?!"

"Not _him_, but whatever it was I thought he was. And then that great bloody bird grabbed me and I don't remember if I..." His voice fell again to a whisper and his eyes, shining with moisture, met Sheppard's. "I think I left the goddamn horn back there."

A large, dark hand tousled the chief surgeon's damp hair. "No, you didn't. You think I would put up with the stench that's on McKay for nothing?" As he spoke, Ronon reached his arm up over his shoulder to withdraw something secured in the sheath sewn into the back lining of his vest.

Elizabeth's mouth fell open as she realized she was staring at the actual horn of a unicorn. Shades of red and dark brown discolored it and she felt uneasy as she wondered how they came by the horn.

Carson sighed loudly. "Oh bless you, son." But his tone immediately shifted. "And you never thought to mention this earlier?"

"Nobody asked. The ride home was kinda quiet." One corner of Ronon's mouth lifted in a slight smile and a mischievous glint lit his eyes. "I grabbed it before I came down to haul your butt out of the lake."

"I _walked_ out on my own, thank you very much," replied Carson, mustering as much indignation as a concussed, damp, sand-encrusted man could.

"That was not walking," stated Ronon plainly.

Carson tried again. "I flew this ship."

Ronon and Sheppard answered simultaneously. "That was not flying."

Movement at the far end of the room caught Sheppard's attention. "Finally!"

Medical personnel rushed in and descended with practiced efficiency onto their patients. Sheppard spoke bluntly to the man attempting to exam his arm. "I can wait – get to McKay." He nodded toward the interior of the jumper.

"He's being seen to already, sir." The corpsman's controlled tone indicated the extent of his experience with patients who thought they knew better. "Right now I need you to come with me to the infirmary so we can get some ice and x-rays for that arm."

The metallic rattling of a gurney being wheeled from the jumper prevented any potential argument. A cannula delivering low flow O2 rested under McKay's nose and an IV tube snaked away from his arm and into a soft pouch of Ringer's lactate. His face was pale, and still-drying viscera, in a rainbow of Ctesias animal colors, clung to his clothes and matted his hair.

Elizabeth gasped softly at the sight of the large, ugly wound that encompassed McKay's shoulder and the black and purple bruises disappearing down his back. Skillfully wielded trauma scissors had stripped away layers of fabric and Sheppard was able to see, for the first time, the extent of his friend's injuries.

"Jeezus, McKay…you look worse than you smell." The humor of the comment rang hollow due to the amount of sincerity in it.

Amazingly, the blue eyes opened partially at that, glancing up at the colonel hovering over him through half-lidded eyes. Rodney's breath hitched slightly as the pain from his injured ribs hampered his speech. "Well maybe… if you hadn't waited so long to fire… the tub of sherbet and the Easter bunnies wouldn't… have been close enough to splatter."

"Well, that's ingratitude for ya!" Sheppard smiled. "I saved your life, remember?"

"Yeah," McKay whispered, eyes closing again, "I remember..."

"Okay, okay," Elizabeth's brow furrowed. "I think we need to get you _all_ to the infirmary. Now."

The medic took Sheppard firmly by the arm, getting him moving after the gurney as McKay was wheeled away. A still muttering Carson was deposited in a wheelchair, and Teyla limped after him as he was wheeled off, not holding a sterile gauze to her face.

Elizabeth started to follow, then glanced back as a solemn figure stepped from the shadows of the jumper's interior. Ronon stopped on the bottom of the ramp, and he nodded to Weir. She stayed a moment longer, then nodded and left him alone...with his sister.

"Ronnie, you should go, too." Nonor emerged last, almost timid, and laid a hand lightly on her brother's arm. "A warrior may only be as strong as his mind, but without a healthy body – he is nothing."

She brushed a strand of her flawlessly beautiful tawny hair out of her eyes and looked soulfully at her sibling, only to have him narrow his eyes at her and answer in a low voice.

"Don't _call_ me that." However, Ronon's shoulders sagged as his sister's expression changed abruptly and her lower lip began to quiver. "All right, all right. Don't. I will go. But you-"

She cut him off, addressing him with a perky, responsible tone in her voice. "I will be fine. I met many fine people here earlier. I am sure any one of them would be gladdened to share with me fresh clothes and a place for bathing."

Ronon shuddered inwardly at the commotion that could arise from such a simple plan if that idea involved his sister. He shook his head with resignation. "Go. But Sister…" He cocked his head slightly, inferring she be on her best behavior.

"Brother," she countered, "You do not have to worry about me anymore. I told you, will be fine." She tilted her head a little, "Of course, I will be better once I know you are fully healed." She smiled prettily, then indicated the door with a toss of her head, golden hair shimmering. "So...go. Please. I promise...all will be well now. It will."

The mix of seriousness and playful sparkle in her eyes made Ronon truly wonder if he had not witnessed his little sister growing up just a little. She kissed him lightly on the cheek and, with one last wink, bounced away, leaving him standing a little dumbfounded alone in the jumper bay.

[{O}]

Rodney heard the voices before his brain gave the order for his eyes to open. He lay still, appreciating the soft warmth of the pillow under his head and the blankets draped over his body. The voices were all well known to him. They afforded his mind and spirit the same comforting warmth that the bedding gave to his body.

However, there was a conspiratorial undercurrent to their volumes and tones.

"No, it's okay. He's with Nonor," stated Sheppard. "Last I saw, she had a flock of followers over on the North pier that were hanging on her every description of, what apparently is now, 'The Great Battle of Ctesias'. Ronon's chaperoning."

"Carson, I never said I didn't believe you-"

"I may have a minor concussion, Elizabeth, but it's not affected what I saw that woman do while he was all but near death, nor does it erase the things she said. He risked his _life_ to save her from that bloody beast and she had no more kind words than he had blood in his body."

Sheppard concurred. "Well, she certainly wasn't shy about being hostile towards him after the incident with Teyla. I gotta say, it's sure got me rethinking what Rodney said he witnessed at the festival. And that alone is making it tough for me just to be in a room with her."

"I still have no memories of the competition," Teyla commented. "Perhaps that is best. I am filled with great anger at even the suggestion that Rodney's injuries could be linked to behaviors such as Dr. Beckett has described."

"And she had some of that healing salve the whole time he was suffering," Beckett said tiredly. "Only used it when he was about to die. Why couldn't she have brought it out sooner?"

Sheppard made an unpleasant sound. "Don't really know if I want someone like that around," he commented.

"I'll be the first to admit I've been more than a wee bit intimidated by Ronon on more than several occasions, but I'll stand toe to toe with him if he's gonna suggest that that ba'-heid stay here in Atlantis."

McKay's heavy lids were slow to open, but it didn't hamper him from speaking. "Oh God, he's getting as bad as Zelenka. Cursing in the native tongue now, are we, Carson?"

"McKay!" Sheppard grinned, moving over. "How are you feeling?"

"Please, how do you think?" Bruised blue eyes opened, turning to stare narrowly at the group. "And I take it, you're talking about Nonor?"

"Aye," Carson said, growling a little. "After what she did, Rodney, I'm—"

"If I could just interrupt your little feeding frenzy here with a voice of reason," Rodney interrupted, focusing on the small group gathered around him, "all things aside – she _did_ save my life." He looked squarely at Sheppard, "If it hadn't been for her, you wouldn't have had anything to rescue, Sheppard."

More than one surprised expression greeted his statement. The scientist licked his lips and swallowed, trying to bring moisture to his dry throat. "Yes, hello. Seeing as I'm one of the topics of this conversation, I thought I might have some input."

He lifted one hand tiredly to stall an interruption as he found the strength to continue. "In case none of you caught on to the fact – not only did she use the _last_ of the salve on my shoulder but she very easily could have left me in that field to be eaten. I even _told_ her to. Well, the leaving part – I was actually hoping to avoid the being eaten part. She thought you all were dead – I didn't. But she still refused to go." He smiled, "And she was amazing, too. You shoulda seen her. I half think she might've won, even if Sheppard hadn't shown up..."

His friends' faces still displayed a range of emotions.

"I'm not saying I'm about to nominate her for the Nobel, but I don't think she's malicious – just not very bright. A five-year-old in the body of a…" his tired mind fumbled for an analogy, but came up empty. "…a thing that's really strong."

He pinched the bridge of his nose then shook his hand in the air, as if to erase his last sentence. "Point being – I'm here because of her, and that should count for something."

Elizabeth filled the subsequent silence with a diplomatic statement. "Well, we're all jumping to conclusions anyway. Ronon hasn't even asked if she can stay." She shifted her attention directly onto McKay and smiled warmly. "How are you feeling?"

"Oh well, ya know…I hurt. Quite a lot actually. I hope someone was taking notes because I think I have quite a few gaps I wouldn't mind getting filled in. What time is it?"

Sheppard interpreted the real question that McKay was asking. "You've been asleep for about twenty-two hours."

"Hmm, doesn't feel like it," he stated plainly. For the first time, he looked closely at his friends. Sheppard's arm was secured in a sling, Teyla's face bore a bandaged wound, and Carson sat up in the bed next to McKay's just looking tired. All sported a variety of scratches and bruises. "Oh God," he whispered as he remembered. "Poor Jerkin." He closed his eyes a moment before he asked, "Everyone else is okay?"

"We lost Boris and Bedevere, as well," Sheppard told him. McKay's eyes softened, and he looked up at the Colonel.

"And Ronon? And Nonor?"

"Good as gold," answered Carson. McKay gave a relieved smile, then blushed guiltily. Sheppard gave him a knowing look.

Clearing his throat, McKay turned narrowed his eyes at Beckett, then barked a mocking laugh as the realization of the chief medical officer's situation struck him. "Wait—you're a patient, too! Ha! Now you know how it feels." He stopped abruptly. "Wait, why _are_ you here?"

"His head isn't as hard as yours," Sheppard replied, allowing a quirky grin to show.

Carson tried only briefly to suppress a smile. "It wouldn't do for me overrule a 24-hour observation order for a concussion. One of you would only use it against me in the future. But don't go gettin' cocky, Rodney… I've access to my rattle and feathers now."

McKay didn't bother to let anyone in on the joke. His mind was already racing ahead to other matters. "So what did we find out about the horn?"

The subsequent serious expressions were immediately apparent. "What? What's wrong?"

Teyla answered in a gentle tone. "It does not work."

"What?"

Carson elaborated. "That is, it doesn't work as a miracle drug on its own. The properties of the horn itself, when ground into a powder, act as a powerful coagulant. But from the preliminary studies the chemists have done – that's all it can do."

McKay shook his head in disbelief. "But we _shot_ that thing and it didn't go down!"

"Aye, but seein' how the alicorn apparently devoured anything that moved - our subsequent theories are supported."

McKay waited barely a second for the physician to continue before prompting him, impatiently. "And those theories are…?"

"The salve is a _combination_ of elements from many different creatures on Ctesias, not just one. Thanks to the amount of…residue on your clothes, we were able to match DNA to elements in the salve. The alicorn most likely healed so quickly because, due to its diet, it had a great build-up of all the right elements continuously flowin' through its system."

McKay flashed an incredulous expression. "So our little trip through 'It's A Sick World' was an enormous exercise in futility?"

"No," replied Carson, vehemently. He glanced at the already-healing bite mark on Teyla's cheek and showed a slight smile. "It appears as if somethin' in the chemical make-up of the nuttalli staves off infection. And we think that great, bloody flapping bird's contribution is to supercharge the liver. Something from it makes for better clearing of poisonous substances, aids in blood clotting; and since the liver is the only organ that can regenerate itself – it offers those restorative benefits as well but on a body-encompassing level.

"So far we've been able to track red blood cell production and stimulation of nerve end growth. It's quite remarkable. Unfortunately, nothin' we have adds up to bein' able to create the entire package of that salve. The genetics folks are gonna run the DNA samples through PCR testin' to see if they can generate more material for experimentation and possible medical use, but it's all very early right now. They need more time. It's bloody complicated. Probably took the best minds of the Ancients to come up with the thing."

Teyla broke in, patting Rodney's blanket-covered leg. "And you both need rest. We can-"

"Wait, wait, wait!" blurted McKay. "What about Ctesias? I mean, what's the next step?"

Elizabeth and Sheppard exchanged a look before Elizabeth answered. "I'm ruling it off-limits. We're not going back. From the team's debriefing I've garnered enough information to label it as too great a risk."

She left out her own strong assumptions that a possible airborne hallucinatory agent in the atmosphere was the most dangerous element of Ctesias. Bloodthirsty, rainbow-colored fluff balls, walking trees, talking molemen – definitely a planet that bred illusionary hysteria.

"Besides," added Sheppard, "Nonor explained the recipe to us during the debriefing. That virgin element is going to be a tough one to get. I'm thinking not too many volunteers for that kind of thing."

Carson pushed off his bed covers and slid his legs to the floor. "Elizabeth, could I trouble you to accompany me to Lab B? I just thought of something else I'd like the chemists to check for."

Elizabeth gave him a wary look. "You're sure you should be up?"

"Oh, I'm fine, lass. I just need you to cover me. If any of my overzealous caretakers see me up and around, I'll just tell them ya overrode my stern warnin' that I shouldn't be outta bed."

He slipped into a robe and tied the belt tightly before holding his arm out for Elizabeth to take. She couldn't help but smile at his audacity and put her arm through his as they left.

Teyla took that as her cue and squeezed McKay's forearm. She didn't say anything, but the look in her eyes communicated all she felt. It was good to see her friend getting better, and she suspected it was because of him that she was still with them at all.

She showed him a simple smile, nodded at the colonel and padded quietly from the room.

Sheppard fiddled briefly with the sling strap around his neck, seeming reluctant to leave. "Need anything?"

"Out of here."

"Anything _I_ can get?"

"A blonde?" Though as soon as the words were out of his mouth, McKay winced. "Strike that, I've had enough for a lifetime."

Sheppard shoved his good hand into the pocket of his cargo pants and shook his head. "Pushed her out of the way, huh?"

"Moment of weakness," replied McKay, in a resigned tone.

"We'll make a warrior out of you yet."

"Ya know, there's nothing wrong with being a scientist. How come nobody ever wants to be a scientist?"

Sheppard attempted a sagely expression. "Warriors are the cool ones. Don't you want to be in with the 'in' crowd?"

"Recent experience has taught me that only gets the crap beaten out of you."

"That's crazy talk. You're getting better and better at it with each mission."

McKay met the colonel's eyes. "Really?" he asked, sincerely.

Sheppard raised two fingers. "Scout's honor." The expression that flitted across McKay's face reminded Sheppard of the skinny kid in jr. high P.E. that just got picked third for dodgeball, rather than last.

"You're on my team. I don't trust just anybody, ya know. A person's gotta earn it." He let those words sink in and hoped McKay understood what he meant.

Sheppard allowed himself to become more serious and looked McKay in the eyes. "You hung in back there. It might sound cliché but not giving up is what makes a great fighter." He cocked his head slightly and offered an afterthought. "Well, that and cool clothes."

McKay rolled his eyes, but a smile played on his lips. Sheppard lightly slapped at his friend's foot before drifting from the room. "We'll get Ronon to hook ya up."

Rodney let his eyes close and tried to chase from his head the vision of himself in the Satedan's ground-sweeping coat. Thank God Atlantis had dry cleaning!

**TBC**

A/N: If you fail me, and not pony up the reviews, this may be the LAST chapter you see! The fabulous "goodbye" might waste way in the back corner of my bunker where I keep my dirty socks. Get cracking with those reviews!

A/N: What the.. there's something on my foot! Sydney! Get off! Damn you! Julie! Get down here! Hey... what are you pointing at, my strange lizard tormentor? Well... would you look at that...


	26. 26:The Goodbye

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX: THE GOODBYE **

A/N: Fanfiction website! Why do you taunt me by not sending out the Automatic Alerts? Why do you refuse to alert my minions that new chapters have been added. Why do you not automatically send me my reviews so I can read them again and again, print them up, cut them out with my special shaped scissors, and savor them forever in my special scrap book? Does no one know that new chapters have been posted? Does that explain why so few people reviewed my last chapter? It isn't because I taunted and threatened you, is it? Aw, you're a bunch of pansies.

[{O}]

Elizabeth and Sheppard watched as Ronon stood with his sister on the floor of the Gateroom, the two saying their goodbyes. Ronan had approached Elizabeth a few days after the team's return from Ctesias and asked permission for Nonor to return to Manaria. Elizabeth later hoped she didn't say yes too quickly or eagerly. She certainly did not want to hurt Ronon's feelings, but the idea of his 'bull in a china shop' sibling being loose in Atlantis was not one she could accept. A part of her sensed that Ronon was relieved to see his sister go as well.

Still, Elizabeth knew...he'd also miss her.

A marine happened to walk too closely behind Nonor as she suddenly flipped her hair, nearly whipping the poor boy with her locks. Sheppard hissed in sympathy, having been standing too close to her himself once or twice when she did that.

"It's really kinda amazing," he whispered to Elizabeth, "how she can be so hyper-aware, and so hyper-oblivious at the same time."

"A person of extremes," Elizabeth nodded.

"It also amazes me," Sheppard added, "just how different the two of them are."

Elizabeth smiled slowly, then shook her head, "They're not that different. Not deep down."

He glanced at her, frowning a little. "How do you figure?"

"Because they're family," she replied. "And underneath it all, they both know that family is the most important thing." She shrugged, "Whether that family is blood...or not."

Sheppard glanced at her, absorbing that, then gave a wry smile as he turned back to the people down below. A second later he snorted a short laugh.

"Speaking of family, did Nonor tell you the names of their parents?"

Elizabeth gave him the fish eye, "Do I want to know?"

"Roann and Aronn."

Elizabeth stared at him for a moment, then pressed her lips together tightly, trying hard not to laugh. Sheppard grinned mercilessly, and leaned in closer.

"Want to hear the names of their grandparents?"

[{O}]

The glow of the event horizon wrapped Nonor in an ethereal light and bounced light off her shiny, flowing locks. She brushed a piece of hair from her eyes and looked up at her brother.

"Ronni-…" she corrected herself instantly, "Ronon, I know it's not easy for you to see me go back to Manaria, but it's for the best. I fear that you would be in my shadow if I was here and you are too great of a warrior for that."

Ronon closed his eyes and shook his head slightly in response to his sister's over-inflated ego. She, however, took it quite differently.

"No, you _are_. Our people will know the truth of the cruelty of Ctesias and the brutal alicorn. I will make sure there are stories for generations about the warrior who was swallowed whole by the ground and who fought his way out…and brought his fellow warriors home with him."

Ronon had only a few seconds to process the fact that she now included Dr. Beckett and quite possibly, McKay, in her definition of 'warrior'.

"My path lies with our people. Yours is here. You now have family in two places." She poked a strong, slender finger into his chest. "And I expect to see you before next year's festival."

She suddenly embraced him in a strong hug, kissed him on the cheek and bounded through the gate. She paused only an instant to toss back a wave and a dazzling, perfect-toothed smile.

Ronon sighed heavily. A bittersweet feeling made him blink away a bit of moisture in his eyes; but a sense of relief easily tempered the emotion. He slid a hand into the pocket of his pants and let his fingers wrap around a small object tucked away there. He had one more thing to do.

[{O}]

McKay shuffled into his quarters and eased himself down onto his bed. He'd argued endlessly over being released from the infirmary, but the first thing he wanted to do when he got out was lie down on his own mattress. There was just something about your own bed.

He stared up at the ceiling as his mind drifted over the events of the team's time on Ctesias. He'd only met Jerkin, Boris and Bedevere for the first time at the mission briefing, but he couldn't help but wonder about the circumstances and luck of the draw that ended their lives and saved his.

Nonor's words flitted through his mind. He couldn't remember when he heard them, just at some time when they were on the planet. The memories were like voices from a television that you fell asleep in front of.

_'…it can see right to the heart of a man… favors those that are pure of heart and sure of the nobility of their deeds.' _

The scientist in him knew it was rubbish. The alicorn was a predator, just like everything else on that damned planet. He absently rubbed at his shoulder and told himself none of the fairy tale language mattered. He'd believed in his friends, and _that's_ what saved him – his friends.

When Nonor told him they were dead, that one word, that one idea, shook him to the core. The team, the people he worked closely with in Atlantis were not like the scientists he'd worked with back on Earth. These people didn't stab you in the back – they watched it.

Another voice floated through his consciousness, and the source surprised him. _'…I have learned the value of my friends.' _

Rodney rarely felt that he connected with the brooding Satedan, but perhaps that's why it was called friendship. You didn't associate with a person because of who they could put you in contact with or what part of their coattail you could ride. You did it because you wanted to - because you trusted them.

He shifted slightly as he became aware of a hard object pressing into his back. Moving slowly, to protect his sore shoulder and ribs, he reached a hand under his shoulder blade and pulled out something that he definitely hadn't left on the bed.

The golden sheen of the two-inch long horn tip gave it a soft glow even in the dim light of his room. A thin, leather cord ran though a hole that had been carefully drilled into the thick end of the pendant. He wondered how Ronon had gotten the lab rats to acquiesce to giving up any part of the horn. Then he realized the horn had most likely arrived at the lab already mysteriously altered. Broken off in battle, no doubt.

Rodney settled back onto his bed and held the necklace cord between two fingers, letting the warrior's charm hang freely. A small, appreciative smile morphed into a verbalized question.

"I wonder if this will get me some of those pastries with the all the sugar on top at next year's festival?"

**THE END?**

A/N: There, it is done! Well, probably. Shower me with your love and affection!

A/N: Will those the damn lizards ever stop squirming? They seem to be over stimulated again. Let's see what they are trying to tell me... Who's over there...Sydney, Octavius. Yes, I see you. Louie, Omar, Nancy, George - put down that giant mug! If they would only stop jumping around so much I might get this. Arthur, Norbert, Doug, what have you gotten into? Tom, Henry, Abdullah, Norah, Kyle, Sukie. Who knew there were so many of them in here. Fabio, Oscar, Raul. Really, this is getting a bit creepy you guys. Annie, Letitia, Luke. (Luke! I am your Father - ha ha! I couldn't resist that one) Thaddeus, Heather, Ed. It's hard to recognize each of them with all the frittering around. Charlie, Opal, Francis, Frances, Emeril, Eudora.

A/N: Honesty, I don't have a clue about what they want. Hey! Put down that percolator! Get back here with my French Press! Leave the espresso maker alone. NO! NO! Not the Mr. Coffee!

A/N: Leave me reviews while I chase down the reptiles! They're escaping the bunker with their ill gotten gains! NOOOO! They have my Starbucks Gift CARDS! YOU BASTARDS! Get back here...

A/N: Seriously... reviews... lots of them.


	27. The Epilogue

**THE NEXT EVENT - by Kolyaaa!**

**THE EPILOGUE**

A/N: Yes, you thought I was done. You thought it was over! Well, with the malfunctioning of the fanfiction website, you might have believed this to be true. This website should know better than to mess with an insane and evil Genii commander! Especially one that has been both coffee-deprived and sleep-deprived! A HORRIBLE MIX! Do they have any idea how many times I hit the refresh button waiting to log on?

A/N Read the epilogue! Read it and love me for it!

[{O}]

"So, how you feelin', Bebs?"

"Could be better. My arm's crampin' a bit. Could you give it a rub, Mang?"

" 'Course," the molewoman said sweetly, and gave Bebbil's arm a squeeze.

"Thanks, my dear," the moleman responded with a warm smile as he continued his work in the nearly dark workroom. They still had five nights to go and he was just getting into the groove. "Be a few minutes before we need to add more," he commented. "Got it ready?"

"Got it all right here," she stated, gesturing to the table. "Even the sap. Amazin'! We don't have to go trackin' no trees. Terrible things to find when they move around so much in the night."

"Aye, we had a bit of luck, didn't we?"

'Yes, we did," Mang said and then sighed. "Those land-dwellers certainly were a bother, though," she stated.

"Aye, they were," Bebbil conceded.

"Rather not have to put up with them. Fallin' in on our homes. Bleeding on things. Put holes everywhere in our lovely tunnels."

"That they did."

"Dabbo and Nobis are gonna be workin' every night to put those right." She squinted her huge teardrop-shaped eyes at memory of the light leeching into their happy home. "And then they gone and flooded the lower tunnels. Cor, it's gonna take some doin' to get that cleaned out."

"We'll manage."

"Gonna be damp for a bit."

"Aye, that it will. Quite a mess they made," Bebbil confirmed. "They always do – those dwellers on land. Got no sense a'tall."

"Always comin' and goin' as if they own both the land above and the land below," Mang said with an unhappy voice.

"Aye, but they did us one fine thing," Bebbil stated as he continued his work. "They supplied us with everythin' we need to make enough of the salve to keep us healthy 'til the end of time." And a smile crinkled his fuzzy face as he gazed at the mortar and pestle, made from blood-marble mined from the Eknar Fissure. It was the only material that could stand up to the tenacity of the alicorn horn. Bebbil was slowly rendering the spiral horn to a dust, aided by the skin of the fezzmick, the blood of the nuttalli, water from the pure fountain of Is and a few secret ingredients.

"Toss me a nugget of the Twiki Bird, dear heart," he called to Mang.

"Here ya go, love," she stated, handing over a hunk of the great leathery bird's whitish flesh. And when their big shovel-like hands touched, their eyes met, and Bebbil gave her a sly wink.

Mang blushed and drew back. "None of that, you rascal," she stated. "You know I have to keep myself pure." She brushed her hands against the ill-fitting linen that draped her, preferring nudity to being clothed – but the ceremony demanded she be dressed in linen – and so she was.

The problem was, the garb really turned-on the alchemist. There was something enticing about a virginal molewoman, all wrapped up. He sighed and tried to think about unpleasant things – like rainbows, sunlight and alicorns. It helped.

The bit of Twiki Bird went into the mix, to be pulverized with the horn and the other ingredients. "Good for the liver," he said offhand to Mang, glad that he and the boys didn't have to make the journey to the Twiki's nesting ground to kill the beast themselves.

Such an expedition was always fraught with dangers. He might have gotten hurt! All that running around above ground at night was never good for a moleman and he was fated to trip and stub something along the way. It was tiring too! And he didn't like to sweat.

Yes, they'd caught a lucky break with the land-dwellers. They almost had too much of the materials – but it would be a shame to waste it.

"Fancy a fruit?" Mang asked sweetly, holding out a juicy slice of reddish fruit.

"I am a bit peckish," Bebbil admitted, and allowed Mang to slip a slice into his mouth. He smiled at her as he gnashed down on the fruit, the juice dribbling down his snout and dripping a bit into the mixture – another of the secret ingredients. He made a satisfied sound as he smacked at the virgin.

Mang shook her head at him, and tsked at his behavior. "Keep your mind on your work, Bebs, and stop thinkin' on me." And she sashayed toward the table that contained the salve's ingredients.

"You're a tease," Bebbil told her, and he continued with his responsibility. He regarded the work ahead of him with a weary heart. Honestly, they didn't need to be doing this right now, and he would have gladly put off the task for years. They already had plenty of the mixture and it was getting to be a bit of a bother to keep it all stockpiled in their sleeping chambers – the substance was best kept close to the body for at least part of the day. Honestly, they didn't need any more and he wondered where they were going to keep the latest batch.

Mang continued in an annoyed voice, "Anyway, good riddance to them – those land dwellers. Wonder what they come here for anyway?"

"Hard to say," Bebbil responded. "Didn't say why they were here, did they?" Already he was getting a bit annoyed at the idea of having more bottles of this stuff shoved around his sleeping pad. He wished he had a means of offloading it somewhere. It had been ages and ages since the Lanteans came around for their usual order of the stuff. He wondered what was keeping them.

Finally, Bebbil stated, "Land dwellers are strange creatures and its best if we don't even try to understand 'em. They're as strange as they are aggravating."

Mang nodded and picked another piece of fruit from the bowl and fed it to her sweetie.

**THE END!**

A/N: Your reviews has charmed my otherwise black and dead heart, so don't stop now. Be certain to keep my shrine free of bird excrement, and leave me gifts of flowers and coffee. The bunker is sadly empty of this life sustaining liquid since the release of the lizards, and I feel strangely over-stimulated in spite of the lack of caffeine. Julie, what have you been putting in my Cream of Wheat?

A/N: More praise! I demand more reviews! I deserve them! You know it, so just go ahead and do it. You tried to review my last chapter, but due to glitches in the website, you were unable. So review this wonderful epilogue and then go back and review the even better Chapter 26! It deserves your lauds! Do not fail to attend to this situation.

A/N: Julie! My beloved! What say we take a little vacation, eh? Someplace far from lizardy things. What do you say to firing up the Winnebago and kidnapping us some McKay again? Certainly, he's wandering around somewhere, unattended. Shouldn't take long to find him. We'll strap him to the back bumper. Ha ha ha! And, on our way home, we can stop by the duty free and get you some more pretty things.

A/N: REVIEW ME! Tell me that you love me! Pour some sugar on me!


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